IoT...


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    0_1479676332984_20161120_211056.jpg




  • area_can



  • @bb36e oh boy, this thing deserves either its own thread, or an honorable mention in the Kickstarter one.

    I mean... The concept is kinda cool, sort of like turning your keyboard into a dashboard for various stuff. But then you realize a keyboard is not a display, and the information you can show on it is pretty limited.

    Their example idea is that you hook to Jenkins or VSTS and set the "B" (for "Build") key to turn red if the build is failing and green if the build is falling. Okay, cool - now imagine you have 50 more shortcuts like that, with various colors. How the fuck are you supposed to remember which key's color stands for what? You'd need a fucking cheat sheet!

    They talk about the "Q" button (great name considering there's already a "Q" button on the keyboard somewhere around WERTY) that's supposed to pull up recent notifications. But all they say is that it works for recent ones - if your semicolon had been fuchsia for a while, you're shit outta luck.

    And either way it's just notifications. Wouldn't it be nice if I could, say, press the fucking B button and have it open VSTS showing the failing build? You know, since it's a keyboard? Nothing about that.

    Or you know what would be even nicer? If it was actually a display instead of a keyboard. Hell, just hook some reprogrammed 7 inch tablet up to the PC and have it show me all that information. I'd totally buy or make a dashboard like that - provided it has a resolution of at least 720p, and not 104 pixels total.


  • I survived the hour long Uno hand

    You see it without looking at it. It’s similar to being in your office and knowing what the weather's like outside without actually having to look out the window.

    "office"? "window"? What are these strange, alien concepts?



  • @Yamikuronue oh yeah, forgot to mention that horrible copywriting effort.

    That’s where the Q button comes in. You push it and that little savant sends a 5 volt discharge to your 32-bit Das Keyboard 5Q CPU, which in turn tells your desktop to display what information is currently streaming from your keyboard. In this very case, it tells you that your “New product launch” project is complete. That’s what the Q button is for. It means “on cue” — but badly spelled.

    So many things are wrong with this paragraph. From the cutesy "little savant", to nonsense technical jargon ("32-bit processor"? Are we going to bring the Jaguar "do the math" ads next? And why should I be impressed that a switch routes a 5 volt pulse to a processor? That's what switches do!) all the way to the wacky XTREME KOOL misspelling.

    Das, you're making $300 gear. Have dignity.


  • area_pol

    @Maciejasjmj said in IoT...:

    The product is clearly intended for professional users and those usually don't need to look at the keyboard. So with that I would have to stop looking at the screen, and look at the keyboard to see if there are any notifications.

    I know where the keys are, the shortcut mapping can be shown on the screen:
    0_1479692935847_blender-shortcuts.png

    "Q" button that's supposed to pull up recent notifications.

    Why is that part of a keyboard? If one wants notifications to show on some keypress, bind that key (on a normal keyboard) to show the notification list.

    If it was actually a display instead of a keyboard. Hell, just hook some reprogrammed 7 inch tablet up to the PC and have it show me all that information.

    Or buy a small HDMI screen.

    The only way this keyboard can be useful is to program it to display pretty patterns or play snake.



  • @Adynathos said in IoT...:

    The product is clearly intended for professional users and those usually don't need to look at the keyboard. So with that I would have to stop looking at the screen, and look at the keyboard to see if there are any notifications.

    But peripheral vision! Since, you know, one key being off-color is something you'd totally see at a glance.



  • @Adynathos said in IoT...:

    0_1479692935847_blender-shortcuts.png

    INB4:
    0_1479719622398_16k.jpg


  • :belt_onion:

    @Maciejasjmj said in IoT...:

    Or you know what would be even nicer? If it was actually a display instead of a keyboard. Hell, just hook some reprogrammed 7 inch tablet up to the PC and have it show me all that information.

    It's almost like someone had that idea in the 80s...

    0_1479724550363_upload-8c9e8712-7691-45c9-b356-5747f883d1c0

    Oh. Right.

    Now, granted, it's silly numbers here, but LCARS was imagined as a contextual system: labels and buttons were supposed to be customizable and different layouts would be used for different contexts. Which kinda does sound like Optimus and this Das Keyboard variant, doesn't it?


  • Impossible Mission Players - A

    @Onyx said in IoT...:

    @Maciejasjmj said in IoT...:

    Or you know what would be even nicer? If it was actually a display instead of a keyboard. Hell, just hook some reprogrammed 7 inch tablet up to the PC and have it show me all that information.

    It's almost like someone had that idea in the 80s...

    0_1479724550363_upload-8c9e8712-7691-45c9-b356-5747f883d1c0

    Oh. Right.

    Now, granted, it's silly numbers here, but LCARS was imagined as a contextual system: labels and buttons were supposed to be customizable and different layouts would be used for different contexts. Which kinda does sound like Optimus and this Das Keyboard variant, doesn't it?

    I remember when I started trying to implement some of that as a Windows Shell replacement. Didn't get very far (because inexperience with WinAPI and hooks in general).

    Now it's almost impossible with how Windows 10 is isolating apps and crap...



  • @Onyx said in IoT...:

    LCARS


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @Adynathos said in IoT...:

    I know where the keys are, the shortcut mapping can be shown on the screen:
    0_1479692935847_blender-shortcuts.png

    That reminds me of the official reminder cards we used to have for use with Word Perfect. All functionality was done with function keys and assorted shift-like modifiers (Ctrl, Alt, etc.) I forget how far the chording went; I learned to use LaTeX rather than putting up with that horror.


  • mod

    @Maciejasjmj said in IoT...:

    But peripheral vision! Since, you know, one key being off-color is something you'd totally see at a glance.

    Especially if you're actually using the keyboard for it's original purpose.



  • Cloud connected keyboard?

    1. Press a key
    2. Keystroke is handled by local window service
    3. Keystroke is encrypted and wrapped in DRM, and uploaded to a Web Service
    4. They keyboard monitors the Cloud Service for a Keystroke response
    5. Cloud Keyboard decrypts keystroke, and puts it in a job queue
    6. Cloud Keyboard computers associate the keystroke with your Cloud Keyboard PRO Account, and translate the package into a standard keystroke
    7. Using a CDN, a response is added to the P2P Keystroke Response cloud
    8. Your computer receives the Keystroke Response, and does a DRM-check, license-check, and decryption on the response
    9. The appropriate keystroke is sent to a USB Keyboard proxy, and then to Windows

    SIGN ME PU

    (whoops, they forgot the Cloud is asynch)


  • Impossible Mission Players - A

    @ben_lubar said in IoT...:

    @Onyx said in IoT...:

    LCARS

    OMG

    WTF BBQ?

    This site is horrifying...

    0_1479960774630_upload-9229bd2d-fa04-48b7-94ac-f626938bfa26

    You've literally overloaded my perception and interpretation with this page...



  • @Tsaukpaetra said in IoT...:

    @ben_lubar said in IoT...:

    @Onyx said in IoT...:

    LCARS

    OMG

    WTF BBQ?

    This site is horrifying...

    0_1479960774630_upload-9229bd2d-fa04-48b7-94ac-f626938bfa26

    You've literally overloaded my perception and interpretation with this page...

    It's not new:

    https://what.thedailywtf.com/post/122887


  • Impossible Mission Players - A

    @ben_lubar said in IoT...:

    It's not new:

    So how is libelously assuming I believed it was new OK?

    Also, apparently havenworks.com is no longer available.

    Thank goodness for Wayback machine, right?

    0_1479961959313_upload-3f581ed4-b199-42ab-af06-7cd7ec28aca0



  • @Tsaukpaetra said in IoT...:

    So how is libelously assuming I believed it was new OK?

    So how is libelously accusing me of assuming you believed it was new OK?

    I just wanted to post a link to that old topic.


  • Impossible Mission Players - A

    @ben_lubar said in IoT...:

    I just wanted to post a link to that old topic.

    I just wanted :giggity: . Looks like neither of us got what we wanted.



  • @Tsaukpaetra said in IoT...:

    @ben_lubar said in IoT...:

    @Onyx said in IoT...:

    LCARS

    OMG

    WTF BBQ?

    This site is horrifying...

    0_1479960774630_upload-9229bd2d-fa04-48b7-94ac-f626938bfa26

    You've literally overloaded my perception and interpretation with this page...

    [GAAK!! RALPH!!] All I can say is that the image does not do it justice.


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @Tsaukpaetra said in IoT...:

    This site is horrifying...

    You should have taken a video. A static image just does not capture the awesome awfulness.


  • Impossible Mission Players - A

    @dkf said in IoT...:

    @Tsaukpaetra said in IoT...:

    This site is horrifying...

    You should have taken a video. A static image just does not capture the awesome awfulness.

    Good idea!

    Ok Google, remind me in fifteen hours to record a video. Yes.


  • Impossible Mission Players - A

    @Tsaukpaetra said in IoT...:

    @dkf said in IoT...:

    @Tsaukpaetra said in IoT...:

    This site is horrifying...

    You should have taken a video. A static image just does not capture the awesome awfulness.

    Good idea!

    Ok Google, remind me in fifteen hours to record a video. Yes.

    lingscars com – 02:40
    — Anthony Takata


  • sockdevs

    @Tsaukpaetra That site makes Geocities sites look professional



  • @Tsaukpaetra LOL'd when you got to "Set up Internet Explorer 11"...


  • Impossible Mission Players - A

    @anotherusername said in IoT...:

    @Tsaukpaetra LOL'd when you got to "Set up Internet Explorer 11"...

    Yeah, I hadn't run it yet on that machine. :D


  • area_can

    Telly station CW-6 said the blunder happened during a Thursday morning news package about a Texan six-year-old who racked up big charges while talking to an Echo gadget in her home. According to her parents' Amazon account, their daughter said: "Can you play dollhouse with me and get me a dollhouse?" Next thing they knew, a $160 KidKraft Sparkle Mansion dollhouse and four pounds of sugar cookies arrived on their doorstep.

    During that story's segment, a CW-6 news presenter remarked: "I love the little girl, saying 'Alexa ordered me a dollhouse'."

    That, apparently, was enough to set off Alexa-powered Echo boxes around San Diego on their own shopping sprees. The California station admitted plenty of viewers complained that the TV broadcast caused their voice-controlled personal assistants to try to place orders for dollhouses on Amazon.

    ...

    This is not the first time an ill-conceived TV spot has caused havoc with voice-control systems. In 2014, a Microsoft Xbox commercial featuring actor Aaron Paul demonstrating Kinect voice control was blamed for causing consoles across the US to spontaneously boot up and launch the game Titanfall every time the ad aired. ®


  • area_can


  • area_can


  • sockdevs

    ...why is a water dispenser running freakin' Windows? :wtf:



  • @RaceProUK said in IoT...:

    ...why is a water dispenserrefrigerator running freakin' Windows? :wtf:

    FTFY

    But your question is still valid.


  • area_can

    @RaceProUK now it's smart!

    they can get your water from the cloud now


  • sockdevs

    @bb36e said in IoT...:

    they can get your water from the cloud now

    0_1483980742576_WYDTISI.png



  • @bb36e said in IoT...:

    OH YEAH WELL I PUT MY DICK IN YOUR TEA!!!

    ... YOUR TEA IS HOT THIS WAS A BAD IDEA!!!! :eggplant::fire:



  • @Lorne-Kates said in IoT...:

    OH YEAH WELL I PUT MY DICK IN YOUR TEA!!!

    :doing_it_wrong: don't put your dick in, just the cream...



  • @Yamikuronue said in IoT...:

    You see it without looking at it. It’s similar to being in your office and knowing what the weather's like outside without actually having to look out the window.

    "office"? "window"? What are these strange, alien concepts?



  • @Onyx said in IoT...:

    @Maciejasjmj said in IoT...:

    Or you know what would be even nicer? If it was actually a display instead of a keyboard. Hell, just hook some reprogrammed 7 inch tablet up to the PC and have it show me all that information.

    It's almost like someone had that idea in the 80s...

    0_1479724550363_upload-8c9e8712-7691-45c9-b356-5747f883d1c0

    Oh. Right.

    Now, granted, it's silly numbers here, but LCARS was imagined as a contextual system: labels and buttons were supposed to be customizable and different layouts would be used for different contexts. Which kinda does sound like Optimus and this Das Keyboard variant, doesn't it?

    Unless it has some haptic feedback (no not that crappy vibration haptic, tactile, like feeling the edges of buttons), I hope it dies in fire. You know how autocorrect is so bad, and you complain about it all the time? That's because you're constantly making spelling mistakes because you don't know where the keys are and the device is having to infer what you meant.


  • area_can

    @Lorne-Kates said in IoT...:

    OH YEAH WELL I PUT MY DICK IN YOUR TEA!!!
    ... YOUR TEA IS HOT THIS WAS A BAD IDEA!!!!

    0_1483983939390_upload-243480b0-be8a-4ab9-a58b-93a199fb358d


  • Impossible Mission Players - A

    @xaade said in IoT...:

    @Onyx said in IoT...:

    @Maciejasjmj said in IoT...:

    Or you know what would be even nicer? If it was actually a display instead of a keyboard. Hell, just hook some reprogrammed 7 inch tablet up to the PC and have it show me all that information.

    It's almost like someone had that idea in the 80s...

    0_1479724550363_upload-8c9e8712-7691-45c9-b356-5747f883d1c0

    Oh. Right.

    Now, granted, it's silly numbers here, but LCARS was imagined as a contextual system: labels and buttons were supposed to be customizable and different layouts would be used for different contexts. Which kinda does sound like Optimus and this Das Keyboard variant, doesn't it?

    Unless it has some haptic feedback (no not that crappy vibration haptic, tactile, like feeling the edges of buttons), I hope it dies in fire. You know how autocorrect is so bad, and you complain about it all the time? That's because you're constantly making spelling mistakes because you don't know where the keys are and the device is having to infer what you meant.

    Man it's a good thing we have accurate keyboards with true haptic feedback to help us out...

    0_1484031500683_Screenshot_20170109-235814.png



  • But, noooooo, voice-only interfaces is a GREAT idea.



  • @Tsaukpaetra I donut seem to have the same amount of lock.


  • Impossible Mission Players - A

    @xaade said in IoT...:

    @Tsaukpaetra I donut seem to have the same amount of lock.

    Once you get a neural interface you never go back!



  • @Tsaukpaetra said in IoT...:

    @xaade said in IoT...:

    @Tsaukpaetra I donut seem to have the same amount of lock.

    Once you get a neural interface you never go back!

    Arguably because the laughing man hacks your mind...


  • Impossible Mission Players - A

    @xaade said in IoT...:

    @Tsaukpaetra said in IoT...:

    @xaade said in IoT...:

    @Tsaukpaetra I donut seem to have the same amount of lock.

    Once you get a neural interface you never go back!

    Arguably because the laughing man hacks your mind...

    But how would you be able to tell?



  • @dkf said in IoT...:

    @Adynathos said in IoT...:

    I know where the keys are, the shortcut mapping can be shown on the screen:
    0_1479692935847_blender-shortcuts.png

    That reminds me of the official reminder cards we used to have for use with Word Perfect. All functionality was done with function keys and assorted shift-like modifiers (Ctrl, Alt, etc.) I forget how far the chording went; I learned to use LaTeX rather than putting up with that horror.

    I thought WordPerfect was awesome, though I haven't used it for awhile. I was outraged when I sat down to a computer that didn't have the cards. The most awesome feature in WordPerfect, one that has yet to be duplicated since, was "Reveal Codes". Ctrl+F3, or something like that, as I recall.


  • sockdevs

    @Tsaukpaetra said in IoT...:

    @xaade said in IoT...:

    @Tsaukpaetra said in IoT...:

    @xaade said in IoT...:

    @Tsaukpaetra I donut seem to have the same amount of lock.

    Once you get a neural interface you never go back!

    Arguably because the laughing man hacks your mind...

    But how would you be able to tell?

    0_1484070667672_upload-208908d0-2587-40e3-9973-2b70f7c092b0


  • Impossible Mission Players - A

    @tharpa said in IoT...:

    @dkf said in IoT...:

    @Adynathos said in IoT...:

    I know where the keys are, the shortcut mapping can be shown on the screen:
    0_1479692935847_blender-shortcuts.png

    That reminds me of the official reminder cards we used to have for use with Word Perfect. All functionality was done with function keys and assorted shift-like modifiers (Ctrl, Alt, etc.) I forget how far the chording went; I learned to use LaTeX rather than putting up with that horror.

    I thought WordPerfect was awesome, though I haven't used it for awhile. I was outraged when I sat down to a computer that didn't have the cards. The most awesome feature in WordPerfect, one that has yet to be duplicated since, was "Reveal Codes". Ctrl+F3, or something like that, as I recall.

    0_1484117595961_upload-04037b4a-217f-4159-a979-8da25941266c

    ???


  • area_deu

    @tharpa said in IoT...:

    @dkf said in IoT...:

    @Adynathos said in IoT...:

    I know where the keys are, the shortcut mapping can be shown on the screen:
    0_1479692935847_blender-shortcuts.png

    That reminds me of the official reminder cards we used to have for use with Word Perfect. All functionality was done with function keys and assorted shift-like modifiers (Ctrl, Alt, etc.) I forget how far the chording went; I learned to use LaTeX rather than putting up with that horror.

    I thought WordPerfect was awesome, though I haven't used it for awhile. I was outraged when I sat down to a computer that didn't have the cards. The most awesome feature in WordPerfect, one that has yet to be duplicated since, was "Reveal Codes". Ctrl+F3, or something like that, as I recall.

    My dad swears on WordPerfect. Mostly because of exactly that function. Also because apparently it works on pretty much any version of Windows since like 95.

    @Tsaukpaetra said in IoT...:

    0_1484117595961_upload-04037b4a-217f-4159-a979-8da25941266c

    ???

    It's more than that. From what I understand, it shows all the formatting codes in a more LaTeX-y way. Hard to describe, but it shows you exactly where any formatting/layout/etc option is set, not just paragraphs or linebreaks.


  • Impossible Mission Players - A

    @Akko said in IoT...:

    @tharpa said in IoT...:

    @dkf said in IoT...:

    @Adynathos said in IoT...:

    I know where the keys are, the shortcut mapping can be shown on the screen:
    0_1479692935847_blender-shortcuts.png

    That reminds me of the official reminder cards we used to have for use with Word Perfect. All functionality was done with function keys and assorted shift-like modifiers (Ctrl, Alt, etc.) I forget how far the chording went; I learned to use LaTeX rather than putting up with that horror.

    I thought WordPerfect was awesome, though I haven't used it for awhile. I was outraged when I sat down to a computer that didn't have the cards. The most awesome feature in WordPerfect, one that has yet to be duplicated since, was "Reveal Codes". Ctrl+F3, or something like that, as I recall.

    My dad swears on WordPerfect. Mostly because of exactly that function. Also because apparently it works on pretty much any version of Windows since like 95.

    @Tsaukpaetra said in IoT...:

    0_1484117595961_upload-04037b4a-217f-4159-a979-8da25941266c

    ???

    It's more than that. From what I understand, it shows all the formatting codes in a more LaTeX-y way. Hard to describe, but it shows you exactly where any formatting/layout/etc option is set, not just paragraphs or linebreaks.

    So something akin to View HTML Source then? (Not sure if that's still available, I can't imagine many would use it)


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