Internet of shit



  • Leads to https://twitter.com/internetofshit and much hilarity / facepalm. Example:



  • That's what he gets for not using HTCPCP.



  • Almost fell out of my chair when I read the Guardian Pick comment:

    Sounds like a case of the port not calling the kettle back.


  • :belt_onion:

    @tufty said in Internet of shit:

    Leads to https://twitter.com/internetofshit and much hilarity / facepalm. Example:

    After a while you'd be glad to give all your data to Russian hackers if they stick to their promise of keeping your lights working.



  • @dcon Excellent. Didn't see that as some combination of uBlock and Ghostery stops comments showing up on many / most sites.

    If only I could make it work on specific comments...


  • sockdevs

    @Groaner said in Internet of shit:

    That's what he gets for not using HTCPCP.

    HTTP 418


  • :belt_onion:

    @Groaner said in Internet of shit:

    That's what he gets for not using HTCPCP.

    I tried it once, the other side would only respond with 402 Fuck you - Pay me.



  • @JBert said in Internet of shit:

    @Groaner said in Internet of shit:

    That's what he gets for not using HTCPCP.

    I tried it once, the other side would only respond with 402 Fuck you - Give me money.

    Fixed for @Lorne-Kates



  • @JBert said in Internet of shit:

    After a while you'd be glad to give all your data to Russian hackers if they stick to their promise of keeping your lights workingmaking the trains run on time.

    FTFY.

    File Under: Or on Thyme.



  • ...and after he finally got the machine to make the tea it created a liquid that was almost, but not quite, entirely unlike tea.


  • area_pol

    Now the Hadoop cluster in garage is going nuts due to RT to @internetofshit, saturating network

    The kettle tried to send the tea back to him through WIFI, I guess the network wasn't waterproof and crashed.

    Home network infrastructure needs significant improvement to get ready for WIFI enabled toilets.



  • @tufty said in Internet of shit:

    Leads to https://twitter.com/internetofshit and much hilarity / facepalm. Example:

    So, the socket has to communicate to the bulb to cut the power to the socket?



  • @xaade said in Internet of shit:

    So, the socket has to communicate to the bulb to cut the power to the socket?

    "You're using an environmentally nasty kind of electricity. I'm not turning on that bulb - it can only use solar power."



  • @dcon DUMMY MODE ENGAGED


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @xaade said in Internet of shit:

    So, the socket has to communicate to the bulb to cut the power to the socket?

    It won't change the power status of the bulb until the bulb confirms that it has successfully applied the update by reporting the signature of the firmware it has installed, countersigned by an authorised software management key.
    Or something idiotic like that.


  • :belt_onion:

    @dkf said in Internet of shit:

    @xaade said in Internet of shit:

    So, the socket has to communicate to the bulb to cut the power to the socket?

    It won't change the power status of the bulb until the bulb confirms that it has successfully applied the update by reporting the signature of the firmware it has installed, countersigned by an authorised software management key.
    Or something idiotic like that.

    Internet of Thing fans would shove the bulb up their ass to secure an enlightened chain of trust


  • :belt_onion:

    @dse said in Internet of shit:

    @dkf said in Internet of shit:

    @xaade said in Internet of shit:

    So, the socket has to communicate to the bulb to cut the power to the socket?

    It won't change the power status of the bulb until the bulb confirms that it has successfully applied the update by reporting the signature of the firmware it has installed, countersigned by an authorised software management key.
    Or something idiotic like that.

    Internet of Thing fans would shove the bulb up their ass to secure an enlightened chain of trust

    Why your <small> tag has leaked out of the quote to make the font of my reply small? Nude :baby: bug?


  • sockdevs

    @dkf said in Internet of shit:

    @xaade said in Internet of shit:

    So, the socket has to communicate to the bulb to cut the power to the socket?

    It won't change the power status of the bulb until the bulb confirms that it has successfully applied the update by reporting the signature of the firmware it has installed, countersigned by an authorised software management key.
    Or something idiotic like that.


    Inkjet printers ahve been getting away with that shit for years now and are just now starting to get flack for it, are you SURPRISED that the fine folks at the internet of things stole that playbook?

    cause i'm not.

    filed under </small>


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @accalia said in Internet of shit:

    are you SURPRISED

    Inspired, actually. :imp:





  • I got some spam from the IEEE Computer Society for a "FREE IoT Event" in Denver 1 Nov. Anybody near there want to go ask the speakers some pointed questions about security? Let me know; I'll give you the link to register.



  • @Adynathos said in Internet of shit:

    Home network infrastructure needs significant improvement to get ready for WIFI enabled toilets.

    Home network infrastructure spends most of its time routing shit already.


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @tufty said in Internet of shit:

    Home network infrastructure spends most of its time routing shit already.

    But the internet is not a series of tubes! That's plumbing



  • @dkf said in Internet of shit:

    But the internet is not a series of tubes!

    Damn right ... it's pussy and cats



  • @dkf said in Internet of shit:

    But the internet is not a series of tubes!

    No. It's one giant, unstoppable, shitehose.



  • @dse said in Internet of shit:

    @dkf said in Internet of shit:

    @xaade said in Internet of shit:

    So, the socket has to communicate to the bulb to cut the power to the socket?

    It won't change the power status of the bulb until the bulb confirms that it has successfully applied the update by reporting the signature of the firmware it has installed, countersigned by an authorised software management key.
    Or something idiotic like that.

    Internet of Thing fans would shove the bulb up their ass to secure an enlightened chain of trust

    Sounds like an ideal use for those old incandescent bulbs(1) we all have lurking in a corner of the house. I have some that are rated for 100W on Edison Screw (E27?) fittings.(2)

    (1) In keeping with previous discussions, I went to my Carrefour and investigated their LED-bulb offerings. They have a much wider range of power equivalences now, all the way up to 100W equivalent.

    (2) The British generally use bayonet fittings for full-size sockets, while the Americans generally use screw-thread fittings ("Edison screw", generally E27). The French, in a spirit of fraternité, use both, although not in the same socket. I have yet to try to find out why, but some of the 60W fittings in my flat use screw-thread bulbs, while others use bayonet bulbs. It's really annoying.



  • @Steve_The_Cynic Before the early '70s, bayonet fittings used to be the most common fitting in France, but they have been largely superceded by the Euro-standardised E14/E27/E40. You can still get BA22 bulbs and fittings, but it's getting harder and harder to do so.

    Not sure if there's really much difference in safety or ease of use between the two.

    The septics use their own almost compatible standards, as per usual. They don't use E27, it's E26 over there.



  • @tufty Around here everything used to be E27 and occasional E14 until the halogens came around with all those crappy G4 and G9 and R7 and whatnot and now it's an unholy mess.



  • @Bulb Amen to that. My halogens are GU5.3, I want to swap them for LEDs but that probably means throwing away the transformers, etc, If I'm doing that I might as well bin the lot and go GU10, the bulbs are cheaper.



  • @tufty My flat is now completely GU10. I had quite a few G9 but they were a pain in the arse. They broke quickly, were very difficult to find, and generally didn't come in very bright versions.

    We worked out it was much cheaper to just replace the lights with GU10 versions in every room.



  • @Adynathos I would more readily accept:

    ERROR_TEA_PACKET_TO_LARGE: Try setting max_allowed_packet to "one_bag" for MyTEA Server.



  • @Bulb I lived in a newly built house in the UK and all ceilings had some weird fittings which looked like it was a low-energy bulb with the electronics in the fitting instead of in the bulb. Which makes sense (assuming the part that breaks is not the electronics), but I never saw this fitting anywhere else, and more worryingly I never saw any matching bulb in any shop.

    Luckily for me, the bulbs lasted longer than I lived there (which was about 5-6 years, so at least they were not too shitty...) so I never really needed new ones, but to this day I have no idea what standard they were.



  • @tufty said in Internet of shit:

    Data specialist Mark Rittman spent an entire day attempting to set up his new appliance so that it would boil on command

    Somehow he reminds me of the poor sod Arthur Dent who tried to teach the Nutri-Matic drink synthesizer to make tea in HHTG2.

    Douglas Adams must be spinning in his grave.



  • @remi With energy saving bulbs, it's almost always the electronics that packs up. They don't like brownouts or fluctuating power supplies at all.

    The promisesales pitch was that they would outlast filament bulbs. They don't.



  • @tufty I don't know if they really outlast filament bulbs (actually, I know they don't, you are right...) but I find that in practice, under normal conditions (*) they last long enough that it doesn't matter.

    I still have some old ones that are more than 10 years old (you know, leftovers from previous homes that stayed at the bottom of the bulb-box...) and work perfectly. To me, that's long enough that if they last less than conventional bulbs, I won't really see the difference.

    (*) I know, everyone has weird stories of a socket that burnt bulbs in a few months or so... mine is an outside lamp in my front garden, I guess some water must creep in somehow.



  • @tufty said in Internet of shit:

    With energy saving bulbs, it's almost always the electronics that packs up.

    I've heard it's typically the miniaturized version of the electronics packed in retrofit bulbs that overheats and burns out, and external electronics are hardier.


  • Grade A Premium Asshole

    Internet of shit device you can use to step in real shit!



  • @blek No-box strikes again

    0_1477422923945_upload-812168a7-8357-4fc9-8400-0e7e98840d34

    Nodebb don't touch this link



  • @blek said in Internet of shit:

    Internet of shit device you can use to step in real shit!

    The future of footwear.



  • @CreatedToDislikeThis
    I'll by late today ... my shoes aren't fully charged yet.



  • We should combine the shoes with solar roadways, then they could charge as you walk. :mans_shoe: :battery: :sun_with_face:


  • Grade A Premium Asshole

    @blek said in Internet of shit:

    Internet of shit device you can use to step in real shit!

    That's the dumbest fucking thing I believe I have ever seen.


  • Impossible Mission Players - A

    @Polygeekery said in Internet of shit:

    @blek said in Internet of shit:

    Internet of shit device you can use to step in real shit!

    That's the dumbest fucking thing I believe I have ever seen.

    You may have missed my post in the status thread about earplugs.


  • Grade A Premium Asshole

    @Tsaukpaetra I did.



  • @Tsaukpaetra said in Internet of shit:

    You may have missed my post in the status thread about earplugs.

    WHAT DID YOU SAY I CAN'T HEAR YOU I HAVE PLUGS IN MY EARS!


  • Impossible Mission Players - A



  • @Tsaukpaetra Perfect for the married man !



  • @Boner said in Internet of shit:

    We should combine the shoes with solar roadways, then they could charge as you walk. :mans_shoe: :battery: :sun_with_face:

    If I can charge a torch or radio with kinetic energy, I should be able to charge shoes by walking anyway. But I'm really waiting for a USB-mitochondria adapter that I can install in my arm and charge devices by burning calories,all without leaving my seat.



  • @CarrieVS said in Internet of shit:

    But I'm really waiting for a USB-mitochondria adapter that I can install in my arm and charge devices by burning calories,all without leaving my seat.

    You’d sell that kind of gadget faster than you can make them to all the fat people who want to reach some kind of idealised weight they’ll never get to even if they do manage to put down their smartphones for more than two minutes.



  • @hungrier I got one onebox over in Dumb things being crowdfunded. that said I looked like a bot and made me do a ReCaptcha before it sent me to the real onebox.

    I should'a screenshotted it.Oh hey, there it is again:

    0_1477503742716_Untitled.png

    I didn't scroll horizontally to capture the rest of that captcha, but it had the horizontal scroll bar at least (the header image was cut off even if I scrolled it right). And a vertical scroll bar, since it was around 3-4x as tall as the onebox.


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