British conventional niceties? Newbie questions
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Hey all you British fellas!
I'm working for a company with based in the UK and my team's manager is a Brit.
The thing is, you Brits are too bloody nice and sometimes I'm not sure what I should say. Sure, I'm not that dense, I know that when asked how I am I should say I'm fine, but e.g. today he told me he "really appreciated" my help. I said something like "thank you, that's extremely nice of you", but I can't shake this feeling that there probably is a line that is customary delivered in such situations.
So, what is it? And while you're at it, what are other customary lines I should probably be aware of so I don't look like a complete moron the next time?
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@kt_ Self-deprecating is the key. Your answer should have been something like 'It was nothing, really.'
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@coldandtired GOOD product, thank you! :)
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@kt_ There's an updated version but I've only ever read the original.
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I've read both and I can't recommend it highly enough. There is a whole section on "work rules" that you'll find very enlightening. Also, for the lighter side:
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@Boner said in British conventional niceties? Newbie questions:
I can't recommend it highly enough.
I hate this phrase. The last two words completely change the meaning of the sentence. Extremely annoying when you try to understand the text you're reading while reading, instead of after you're done.
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@Gąska We do that on purpose to keep foreigners out of our language.
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@Tiggrrr42 I think I might be British.
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@blakeyrat said in British conventional niceties? Newbie questions:
@Gąska We do that on purpose to keep foreigners out of our language.
And you fail. Not only we still use and abuse your tongue - we talk even more, since complaining about English language is one of the best flamewar materials!
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@Gąska said in British conventional niceties? Newbie questions:
complaining about English language is one of the best flamewar materials!
no, complaining about the mess you foreigners leave hanging off your letters is the best flamewar material. What's wrong with just being called @gaska?
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@Jaloopa said in British conventional niceties? Newbie questions:
What's wrong with just being called @gaska?
You can call me @gaska, but only if you let me call you @jalepa. It's about the same degree of mispronunciation.
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@Gąska said in British conventional niceties? Newbie questions:
@Boner said in British conventional niceties? Newbie questions:
I can't recommend it highly enough.
I hate this phrase. The last two words completely change the meaning of the sentence. Extremely annoying when you try to understand the text you're reading while reading, instead of after you're done.
This is the same issue I have with Ruby's
foo bar if baz
In English it doesn't bother me.
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@Gąska call me mot u wont m8
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OK Dave.
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@Gąska said in British conventional niceties? Newbie questions:
we still use and abuse your tongue
Oh, I've been bad.
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@Jaloopa said in British conventional niceties? Newbie questions:
What's wrong with just being called @gaska?
Well, there's fact that he won't get the @mention.
Filed under: Oh man, I need to create an alt called @bląkeyrat.
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@error he would if he changed his name to something typable
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@coldandtired said in British conventional niceties? Newbie questions:
@kt_ Self-deprecating is the key. Your answer should have been something like 'It was nothing, really.'
Looks like a good read, but the lack of a Kindle version ensures I'll never read it.
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@Gąska said in British conventional niceties? Newbie questions:
You can call me @gaska, but only if you let me call you @jalepa. It's about the same degree of mispronunciation.
At least I can type @jaloopa without copypasting from somewhere else
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Hey, this thread is about British niceties! Stop talking about the English language! If you want to do that then go and make your own thread!
If you don't obey this thread will be deleted!
filed under: it feels funny when I do that
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@Dave said in British conventional niceties? Newbie questions:
@error he would if he changed his name to something typable
Fuck you, not going through that process again.
@kt_ said in British conventional niceties? Newbie questions:
Hey, this thread is about British niceties! Stop talking about the English language!
Oh right. English language definitely doesn't qualify as nice.
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@Gąska said in British conventional niceties? Newbie questions:
Fuck you, not going through that process again.
They should create a group called @Gaska and throw you on it. That would work as an alias.
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@all_users Uh, I have a dishwasher. The dishes go in it filthy and come out clean and dry.
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@Gąska said in British conventional niceties? Newbie questions:
I hate this phrase. The last two words completely change the meaning of the sentence. Extremely annoying when you try to understand the text you're reading while reading, instead of after you're done.
That's their revenge for you people inventing the "reverse polish notation". Wtf were you thinking?
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@all_users said in British conventional niceties? Newbie questions:
TIL people still wash dishes by hand...
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@candlejack1 said in British conventional niceties? Newbie questions:
create a group called @Gaska and throw you on it.
I'm not sure if @Gąska would appreciate that ...
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Some important general points:
- Understatement. If a Brit says 'a little bit' or 'just slightly' or anything similar, with any emphasis at all, they mean a lot. It's actually quite hard for us to convey something being genuinely not very much.
- Self-deprecation. It's usual to talk as though you put yourself last. You don't usually have to mean it, and it's important to remember that your native colleagues will usually not mean it. If you thank someone and they say 'it's nothing' or 'don't mention it', they don't actually want you to forget about it. And 'does anyone want the last _' always means 'I want the last _' so it can be pretty bad form to say you do.
- Inverted politeness. This depends on the setting but it can be a mark of friendship to be informal to the point of rudeness with someone. If people casually insult each other to other people all the time, they're probably best mates, and if someone's unexpectedly formal they're either uncomfortable or really annoyed with you.
- We'll love you if you get it wrong, as long as you can take it with good humour. Remember the last point - if people mention your mistakes and take the mick, it means they like you.
- All of the above apply except when they don't.
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@CarrieVS Apparently I'm British. Huh.
(I blame living in nz)
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Semirelated, the world's most British car crash...
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@error The original version is available for the Kindle at that link.
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@anotherusername my first thought: why the fuck he's going on the left side of the road? Is he crazy or something?
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@coldandtired said in British conventional niceties? Newbie questions:
@error The original version is available for the Kindle at that link.
Filed under: I guess I can pay with Monopoly money., After the Brexit that's about what it's worth.
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FkF_XpA5P48
For reference :)
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@Tsaukpaetra said in British conventional niceties? Newbie questions:
TIL people still wash dishes by hand...
I have a 1927 house with cabinets that aren't deep enough to install a dishwasher.
That said I solved my problem with one of these:
But it's not like washing dishes by hand is super-difficult or time-consuming.
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@anotherusername Does he always drive with a GoPro?
If it hadn't basically destroyed a decent car, I'd call that a fake. Still on the fence.
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@error Odd. I'm sure it's available at Uncle Google's house.
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@Gąska said in British conventional niceties? Newbie questions:
@anotherusername my first thought: why the fuck he's going on the left side of the road? Is he crazy or something?
my first though, they still didn't fix youtube being cropped on mobile
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@Weng Loading a dishwasher is normally more work than actually just cleaning the damn things.
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@Boner said in British conventional niceties? Newbie questions:
I've read both and I can't recommend it highly enough. There is a whole section on "work rules" that you'll find very enlightening. Also, for the lighter side:
[Indicating that the situation has become dangerously out of hand by saying "that's a bit off"]
Although I'm not British, I also do this kind of downplaying too.
Say when I was porting a parts calculating Excel formula sheet to VBA, when the merchandiser point to me a bit dismatched fields based on the old ordering sheet (CC-ed to everyone in senior management because that Excel workbook template was vital to business operation), I sheepishly replied If you change the Qty of model number "Q1234" from "805" to "85", the number of part "B1" required would be correct., implying that there was miscalculation in her actual order.
Too bad that she reply with email saying something like Changing Qty manually to match result is not acceptable. Blah, blah, blah... I think someone in senior management caught the problem when studying the context of error closely, and one month later I found she left the company.
The takeaway: We programmers working in-house does not afraid to admit making mistakes, especially when the code does not go live yet and there's still plenty of time before the project is due. When you see us reply by downplaying the problem like provide instruction to change a field that is simply no way to be sane as "workaround", chances are the problem is on your side not my side.
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@lucas1 said in British conventional niceties? Newbie questions:
@Weng Loading a dishwasher is normally more work than actually just cleaning the damn things.
If you have giant dryer rack, sure it is. But I don't have giant dryer rack.
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@lucas1 ... What, are you playing dish Tetris? Put it where it fits, if it isn't optimal and you run out of space leave the remainder for next time.
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@all_users Stop living a poverty style life and buy a dishwasher.
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@blakeyrat said in British conventional niceties? Newbie questions:
But it's not like washing dishes by hand is super-difficult or time-consuming.
If you live alone, this may be correct.
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@Weng no nothing to do with that.
You normally have to wash or scrape off sauce etc before putting in the washer. Time I've done that I might have well have just washed it.