🔥🔥 MLP Resume Boning :giggity:



  • E_ANECDOTAL

    At least the programmer in a suit is able to follow basic directions, like "come to work dressed appropriately."



  • I just put my car in a shop where they advertised that they "at least wash their hands"....



  • Perhaps the problem employees are the ones that don't wash their hands...



  • That's an assumption.

    I would rather measure by performance, than tertiary factors.

    The only reason this works for companies, is when labor supply is higher than demand.

    And besides, we're not talking about a situation where "come to work in a suit" was a direction, just a assumed rule.



  • You aren't sure if washing your hands is bad?


  • Grade A Premium Asshole

    @rc4 said:

    You aren't sure if washing your hands is bad?

    It can be.



  • If it's a greasemonkey, unless there's a need to avoid cross contamination of grease....

    The point I'm trying to make here, is that expecting a certain style of resume and a certain dress are luxuries because labor is in high supply and because there are these unspoken rules.

    If either of those is challenged, companies will find themselves taking brony resumes seriously.

    Assuming that one can always dismiss people of certain dress and style, is just pure arrogance, and I'm not a fan of arrogance.



  • It's not arrogance. If you can't demonstrate what is widely regarded to be professional conduct and dress in what is considered professional clothing, then you obviously don't take working at my company seriously.


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place


  • Winner of the 2016 Presidential Election Banned

    @cartman82 said:

    For the last time, I LIKE THE FEELING OF BREEZE AROUND MY BALLS! MY BIG MANLY MAN'S BALLS! THAT'S IT!

    Jeesh.


    I have a picture for this occasion.



  • It is if you purposefully put your company at a disadvantage in order to maintain appearances of internal employees. At that point I can wonder if you take making profits seriously.

    Like I said, you can only expect it as long as the market is saturated with programmers.

    As soon as demand passes up supply, or the entire supply simply says "hell with it", you are putting yourself at a disadvantage if you continue to stand by outdated dress codes.

    Given current trends, I can tell you that business suit for interviews and strict dress codes are dying as quickly as Generation X is leaving the workforce.

    We've been on a trend of relaxed dress since victorian England. If you think today's suits are formal, then I have a long history of dress conventions for you to look over.



  • @xaade said:

    If you think today's suits are formal

    I do not, they are called "lounge suits" for a reason. I know what black tie, white tie, stroller, morning dress, and ceremonial dress are.



  • But black tie would be consider informal a couple of centuries ago.

    "Why, Good sir! For what is your collar folded down? Are you a ruffian?"



  • @xaade said:

    But black tie would be consider­ed informal a couple of centuries ago.

    Yes, it would have been (hence "semi-formal"). What's your point? That was then, this is now.



  • Oh don't be dense.

    What is considered formal over time has become relaxed.

    It's an obvious trend.

    Soon, polo and slacks will be formal.

    We'll be like Star Trek, where formal simply means dropping two-tone and adding gold trim.



  • That doesn't mean that's going to continue forever, as fashion has stabilized over the last century (in case you hadn't noticed).

    That also doesn't mean that what is considered formal/informal now has already changed. It hasn't.

    Lastly, you should always show you are willing to go the extra mile and try to put your best foot forward during professional interactions. If that includes donning a suit, then don one.



  • @rc4 said:

    That doesn't mean that's going to continue forever, as fashion has stabilized over the last century (in case you hadn't noticed).

    Bull, the latest trend is an obvious change in collar, even on tux. And cuff links are optional.



  • @xaade said:

    And cuff links are optional

    On a tuxedo? No, that's tacky. Celebrities are a terrible guide to fashion, unless you're talking about George Clooney.

    Regardless, that may be the case in the future, but it is not the case now.



  • @rc4 said:

    Lastly, you should always show you are willing to go the extra mile and try to put your best foot forward during professional interactions. If that includes donning a suit, then don one.

    Actually, that's debatable.

    Lately, the idea that you dress to your audience is gaining popularity.



  • Okay, but if you come to interview with me in a polo and slacks I will laugh at you. That doesn't mean that everyone will. But I would.



  • @rc4 said:

    Okay, but if you come to interview with me in a polo and slacks I will laugh at you. That doesn't mean that everyone will. But I would.

    I'll miss you, 20th century.



  • I'm so sorry you have no sense of style or professionalism.



  • But, to be clear, I'm not suggesting you don't put your best foot forward.

    I'm suggesting that to continually expect suits when the market doesn't want to support them, is arrogance.



  • I expect professionalism. If the office is all polos and trash, then dress like that. If the office is button-down shirts and slacks, dress in a suit. If the office is executive casual, go for the suit. If the office is suits, go for the suit.

    Our office ranges from button-downs and slacks to the full monty. If you know that, you should dress in a suit. When in doubt, go for the suit.



  • @rc4 said:

    Our office ranges from button-downs and slacks to the full monty. If you know that, you should dress in a suit. When in doubt, go for the suit.

    And I agree.

    So it's pointless to argue me there.

    But what if you desperately needed a programmer, and literally every applicant came in with polo? Will you laugh them all out? Tell your boss no one is hirable? There's a high likelyhood you'll reach this point before you retire.



  • But not every programmer would. Given the hypothetical though, I'd probably just pick an outstanding candidate from that pool. If there was nobody that was very impressive, I would tell him to keep searching.



  • @rc4 said:

    But not every programmer would

    Would you pick the newbie with no experience over a 20 year expert with all the skills you need, simply because the kid dressed in a suit?



  • No, but if the difference was slimmer it would definitely weigh heavily to the one dressed to impress. It shows they have respect, want to demonstrate professionalism, and want to go the extra mile for the job vs. the guy who is totally unaware that suits are generally still required at Fortune 500 companies (at least for an interview).

    Now, if the guy couldn't communicate professionally, then I wouldn't pick him regardless of what he was wearing because it's not just about the suit, it's about an overall professional appearance and image which includes being able to effectively communicate in a professional environment. If there's a guy in a suit and tie with 5+ years of experience and great professional writing and communication skills, I would gladly pick him over a guy with 10+ years of experience who dresses too casually and isn't very good at the interpersonal stuff. IT's weakness is the social/political aspect, and finding candidates that can bridge that gap is very valuable today.



  • @rc4 said:

    IT's weakness is the social/political aspect, and finding candidates that can bridge that gap is very valuable today.

    @rc4 said:

    No

    See, you can be reasonable. :)



  • What?Oh, now I understand. I've been trying to make that point the whole time, and I believe that was in my original post.



  • You're not clutching desperately onto stupid.

    Seriously, I've worked at a company where "professionalism" was valued so much higher than actually ability, talent, etc, that I don't think they'd survive if they had a real competitor.

    All old men in suits that valued the number of lines of code written over actual features and robustness.

    As if programming was a factory line.



  • That's simply a matter of not understanding your product. Being a businessman is nearly equal to being good at your job. Obviously you can't just be a businessman and not be good at your job, but you need to be good at acting professionally, otherwise you're going to get into a lot of fights with the non-IT people. If you can show that "hey, I am one of you guys, I'm not some dork in a hoodie that acts all aloof because I think it's cool!" you'll get a lot more done than if you were trying to be all "lone-wolf" (no offense).



  • @rc4 said:

    but you need to be good at acting professionally, otherwise you're going to get into a lot of fights with the non-IT people.

    Depends on how your non-IT behave.

    Look, the line between dignity and arrogance is very thin.



  • @xaade said:

    Look, the line between dignity and arrogance is very thin.

    Perhaps, but arrogance is a necessary evil in the business world, as long as it doesn't go unchecked. Having the right amount of arrogance will get you places. (Too much and too little are bad for their own reasons).



  • Relevant:



  • That is the most awesome resume ever.



  • @Polygeekery said:

    But if someone shows up in their underwear for a job interview and jerks off halfway through the meeting, I won't fucking hire them either.

    What if you're hiring for a porn film?


  • Grade A Premium Asshole

    Honestly, I would prefer that all employees not have a tumblr account. If someone lists their tumblr on their resume, I would probably shitcan that résumé also.

    I fucking hate tumblr. :belt_onion:


  • Grade A Premium Asshole

    @Groaner said:

    What if you're hiring for a porn film?

    I do first meetings for new hires over lunch or coffee. If they start jerking off in the middle of a pub or coffee shop...not a good idea to hire them even for a porn film.



  • @rc4 said:

    I would find it equally strange if I worked with a 40-year-old that liked Thomas The Dank Engine

    FTFY

    Thomas the Dank Engine | SFM Animated Music Video – 01:55
    — ICTON



  • @Weng said:

    So I'm stuck wearing a zippered coat against the 0% chance that a customer will accidentally wander away from their tour, up a stairwell, follow somebody through a security door into this secure area and be offended by a programmer wearing a Ferrari T-shirt.

    Things could get ugly if the customer's a hardcore Ford/Chevy/Mopar fan.



  • @Polygeekery said:

    I do first meetings for new hires over lunch or coffee. If they start jerking off in the middle of a pub or coffee shop...not a good idea to hire them even for a porn film.

    But think of all the well-timed jokes that could come out of it! "So, Bob, it looks like you'd be a good fit in our organization and we'd like to move forward to the next step in the process. Are you equally interested, or are we just jerking off?"



  • I am going to be blunt here, even by MLP fan standards, this is bad. Awful, awful recolors with color gradients that have way too many colors. And what's the source artwork? Instantly recognized stock vectors that cost respect.


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @henke37 said:

    I am going to be blunt here

    So your problem with this resume is basically it's too derivative/lazy?



  • @xaade said:

    Quite honestly, I've seen more immature behavior from people who can cross their t's and dot their i's on that list of civil professionalism, than I've ever seen from a programmer in a T-shirt.

    Add it there is people like me. I was never hired anywhere a psychologist has blocking power.

    But despite being crazy, I solve complex problems that some people wouldn't be able to, and noone ever regretted hiring me, that I know of.



  • What are you doing with IT? Please become a full time writer.
    I wanna read a Lorne's mystery book with a touch of WTF.


  • area_deu

    @fbmac said:

    noone ever regretted hiring me, that I know of.

    Because you quickly made them regret other things, like being disposed of in four separate dumpsters?



  • @Polygeekery said:

    Most of the work people do for me is done from their home. They probably work lots of days in t-shirts and boxer shorts. I would wager they occasionally take a break and jerk off.

    Are you hiring? Can I send you a CV?



  • On a related note, hr from the company made a (don't know the translation, something that you do silly tasks, for self-knowledge or something) that involved zodiac and the month people are born.

    Its a big company, owned by one of the 100 largest companies in the world. They use zodiac. It's been said that they used to like numerology before being bought by very large corp.



  • @fbmac said:

    Its a big company, owned by one of the 100 largest companies in the world. They use zodiac. It's been said that they used to like numerology before being bought by very large corp.

    A bunch of Japanese companies use some kind of blood type pseudoscience. Apparently, that's as big there as astrology is in the west.


Log in to reply