Retro VGS: Game like it's 1975! But also shittier.



  • Continuing on the theme of, "has there ever been an IndieGoGo project that wasn't complete trash", we have the Retro VGS:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rw1ewroT64M

    (Hat tip https://twitter.com/SensibleGaming/status/646007427008229376 which I think is IconProUK.)

    Note that their controller has dual analog sticks, so they're obviously not that into retro.

    Why cartridges? Because disk-based systems "separate players from their games" some... how...? Also keep in mind, if you buy a Retro VGS game, no matter which one it is, it'll be one of the best games of the 21st century. VIDEO SEZ SO!

    I like drowsy uninterested guy in the loud shirt around 3:20 in the video. His posture just screams, "hey guys, are you sure I can't sit down for this video interview? I had a hell of a night last night..."


  • Grade A Premium Asshole

    Less than $2M to bring a new console to market...and populate it with games?

    Yeah, good luck with that one fellas.


  • area_deu

    Ahaha cartridges.

    HAVE FUN SPENDING ALL NIGHT BLOWING THEM!


  • Grade A Premium Asshole

    @aliceif said:

    HAVE FUN SPENDING ALL NIGHT BLOWING THEM!

    :giggity: :giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity::giggity:



  • @Polygeekery said:

    Less than $2M to bring a new console to market...and populate it with games

    Cartridge games, which are even more expensive to mass produce


  • area_deu

    Gunlord as a launch title. LOL.

    You know what that game is? It was released in 2012 and is made for NEO-GEO AND DREAMCAST.

    Kids, the Retro VGS is SO DEAD!


  • Grade A Premium Asshole

    @aliceif said:

    Ahaha cartridges.

    HAVE FUN SPENDING ALL NIGHT BLOWING THEM!

    On a more serious note, blowing on the cartridges did jack shit.


  • Grade A Premium Asshole

    @aliceif said:

    It was released in 2012 and is made for NEO-GEO AND DREAMCAST.

    Yeah, there is a fucking phrase that doesn't compute...

    Neo Geo was 1990, Dreamcast was 1998. So that game was stillborn no matter how good or shitty it may have been.



  • @Polygeekery said:

    On a more serious note, blowing on the cartridges did jack shit.

    Of course, it was just a gimmick call centers used to get idiots to actually remove and replug the cartridges instead of just pretending to.

    Anybody who's done technical support has used strategies like that before.



  • Also what the fuck is with people's stupid obsessing with WAAAH OLD VIDEO GAMES WERE BETTER.

    No? Not even remotely? Have you even tried playing the older games? The vast majority of them are not good. At all.

    Also, don't they realize most of what they are doing is infringing copyright? Or something


  • area_deu

    @mrguyorama said:

    Have you even tried playing the older games? The vast majority of them are not good. At all.

    Same applies to last-gen shovelware, though.

    Oh, and current indie games, as @blakeyrat can confirm.



  • True dat

    Turns out the vast majority of videogames aren't good.


  • Grade A Premium Asshole

    @mrguyorama said:

    Also what the fuck is with people's stupid obsessing with WAAAH OLD VIDEO GAMES WERE BETTER.

    No? Not even remotely? Have you even tried playing the older games? The vast majority of them are not good. At all.

    Some of the old Mario titles are still very playable, but mostly in a nostalgia context.

    The oldest video game that I can think of that I would still want to play would be "Metal Gear: Solid". That came on a disc.



  • Psst:

    I have it on good authority (the thing you ACTUALLY QUOTED) that the series is called "Mighty" and not "Mightuy". Pro-tip.

    BTW the cheapest game they will have as a launch title is $30. (It's $10 on Steam, I just checked.)

    Also their $50 game appears to be a lame video poker game, AFAICT.

    Le gasp!

    • System-related data (such as preferred initials for high-score lists, preferred controller configurations, etc.) may be stored on an optional USB thumb drive

    Memory cards!? That doesn't sound very RETRO! That sounds kind of Playstation to me!


  • area_deu

    Also, this is what a cartridge console should look like nowadays:
    <img src=http://vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/egamia/images/8/8b/PCengine.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20081029022729>
    1987

    Oh, and the cartridges for this were sold in JEWEL CASES!



  • "Never update"? "Never patch"? They're marketing their drawbacks as features?

    @blakeyrat said:

    if you buy a Retro VGS game, no matter which one it is, it'll be one of the best games of the 21st century

    Apparently, since it has to be perfect from the get-go because you can't fix anything!


  • Grade A Premium Asshole

    15% of whatever percentage that gray piece turns out to be, will be used for outsourcing software development.

    That does not exactly inspire confidence...


  • area_deu

    Also, the Retro VGS looks like an ATARI JAGUAR:



  • And this thing has fucking 9-pin controller connectors.

    And fucking composite video output. Jeesh, it's 2015 people, and you expect developers to design their games for 576i?!


  • sockdevs

    @blakeyrat said:

    which I think is IconProUK

    Nope; I've never had access to that Twitter account, and I never will.



  • @aliceif said:

    Also, the Retro VGS looks like an ATARI JAGUAR:

    If you look closely you might notice something familiar about the appearance of RETRO VGS. In a move that saved our team considerable start-up capital we purchased and took ownership of the original mold tooling Atari used to create the Atari Jaguar in the early 1990's. This tooling is still in exceptional condition and able to create high quality, polycarbonate parts to this very day. We are repurposing this tooling to create the RETRO VGS console and cartridge shells, with slight modifications.





  • @Polygeekery said:

    15% of whatever percentage that gray piece turns out to be, will be used for outsourcing software development.

    That does not exactly inspire confidence...

    Well, at least their graph looks like a 2-frame animation of PacMan.



  • Talking from a uk perspective if a box that had netflix, sky go, amazon prime, bt sport and kodi support with decent remote/xbox controller support I would snap it up. Some of the android boxes come close but usually have shit remote/controller support and some of those apps don't work with rooted boxes which most of them are. At the moment you need seperate box for sky and amazon. Terrible kodi support on both. Netflix is available everywhere but that doesn't have live sports. Streaming from pc would awesome but very few boxes have good support for it. There is a niche for this stuff but they'll never have the software to back it up as we saw with ouya.



  • @DogsB said:

    if a box that had netflix, sky go, amazon prime, bt sport and kodi support with decent remote/xbox controller support I would snap it up.

    Instead, it has wannabe Mega Drive games. Also, from the UK perspective, you'll have to import your cartridges because "quality over quantity" means you're not getting downloadables.

    Seriously, it's 2015, and by doing a system that's unusable without physical media, catering to small developers that have no chance of worldwide releases, they're shooting both them and themselves in the foot over, and over, and over.


  • area_pol

    Well I can produce this device - alone, in a week, for less than 100$:

    • buy a Raspberry Pi for around 50$ and put it in an ugly plastic box
    • get the cheapest and smallest pendrive, put it into an ugly plastic box and call it a "cartidge"
    • find some flash/HTML5 games on the internet and put them on the pendrive
    • write a simple program that mounts the pendrive and plays any flash/HTML5 found on it
    • sell it for 300$


  • Remove flash and you have a product.



  • @coldandtired said:

    Worth a hundred of anyone's pounds.

    I'd be willing to give them 300 pounds, if they're willing to cover the surgery costs.


  • Winner of the 2016 Presidential Election

    @aliceif said:

    Also, the Retro VGS looks like an ATARI JAGUAR:

    Confidence++!


  • Winner of the 2016 Presidential Election

    @mrguyorama said:

    Also what the fuck is with people's stupid obsessing with WAAAH OLD VIDEO GAMES WERE BETTER.

    I do maintain this is true in some cases. For example, I personally can't stand 95% of modern shooters. I'm probably an outlier there, but I do have my reasons. They might be subjective, but I do have them.

    The question is, do people who agree with me on that count as a big enough market to cater to. And some of the indie games coming out lately (not necessarily shooters, I just used that as an example) and doing good would seem to indicate that yes, it's a valid market.

    In conclusion, luddites can be paying customers too. Leave us be and go play CoD in peace, we don't judge. Well, we do, but we judge harshly and consistently.



  • @mrguyorama said:

    Also what the fuck is with people's stupid obsessing with WAAAH OLD VIDEO GAMES WERE BETTER.

    Blakeyrat
    https://what.thedailywtf.com/t/people-who-want-to-live-in-the-future-are-shitty-assholes/51106/2?u=lorne_kates


    Filed under: I found that using Google because fuck Discourse


  • Winner of the 2016 Presidential Election

    @Onyx said:

    I personally can't stand 95% of modern shooters. I'm probably an outlier there, but I do have my reasons. They might be subjective, but I do have them.

    QFT. The last shooting game I enjoyed was Spec Ops: The Line, and that was for the story/presentation rather than the shooting. As a shooter it was pretty mediocre



  • ... except Spec Ops is a mediocre shooter, nobody will disagree with that. The only reason it's notable is its excellent story.

    In a world with Sniper Elite games (but not the dumb zombie ones) and the Wolfenstein remakes, I can't believe anybody is saying this frankly. Are shooters bad, or do you just not bother playing them? Because the ones I see are excellent.


  • Winner of the 2016 Presidential Election

    I think I've argued this with you before. I just don't like shooters, so yeah I don't bother playing them these days.



  • This.

    There are excellent shooters. Don't ask me to name them.


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @mrguyorama said:

    There are excellent shooters. Don't ask me to name them.

    Lee Harvey Oswald?



  • @dkf said:

    Lee Harvey Oswald?

    Sniperfag.

    Jack Ruby?

    Camping n00b.



  • JET FUEL CAN'T MELT STEEL BEAMS!!!!

    whoops wrong conspiracy...



  • @aliceif said:

    Oh, and current indie games, as @blakeyrat can confirm.

    The games I've enjoyed the most in the past 4-5 years have all been under $40. Most of them were less than that.


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