How Oracle ruined my holidays
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First, let me state I don't "do Oracle". I have nothing to do with that piece of shit database system. I wouldn't put one byte of data in an Oracle database. Yet, thanks to that piece of crap failing YET AGAIN here I am with ruined holiday plans.
I just got home after spending 6 hours while we tried to figure out why exactly Oracle locked up again and took everything with it. Of course, I wasn't even supposed to be at work today. I was supposed to be enjoying my holiday in another state. Yet, I had to cancel my plans and reservations because we were having a problem that they SWORE UP AND DOWN was my system. Oh heaven to betsy no it isn't the fucking piece of shit Oracle system, it's YOUR system. So wanting to take responsibility (if it was my system) I cancelled my plans and showed up early at work this morning after working until 10pm last night on trying to find the problem.
Well, sure enough, guess what.... turns out it was an Oracle problem after all! Apparently it doesn't have enough intelligence in this multi-million dollar piece of shit to handle multiple record writes in a short period of time. I mean, after all, we've only sunk countless wads of money into this thing for the past few years and every year (like clockwork) we are spending more to upgrade it to the latest software/hardware because "... Oracle says that will fix it".
How in the world can anyone use this piece of junk? I mean, my god, every outage we have had in the past few months has been directly related to Oracle in some form or another. I mean the goddamn thing can't handle more than 20 connections!
So thanks a lot Larry Ellison for this piece of shit. I'm really enjoying my holidays now!
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[quote user="oracle_hater"]
Well, sure enough, guess what.... turns out it was an Oracle problem after all! Apparently it doesn't have enough intelligence in this multi-million dollar piece of shit to handle multiple record writes in a short period of time. I mean, after all, we've only sunk countless wads of money into this thing for the past few years and every year (like clockwork) we are spending more to upgrade it to the latest software/hardware because "... Oracle says that will fix it".
[/quote]
You could have hired someone who understands that technology for those countless wads of money, but somehow it doesn't sound as if anyone in your company has thought about that option yet.
l.
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Sounds exactly right...people who hate Oracle just b/c they don't know it and it costs a lot.
Of course the system is cryptic to you and your Access database does everything you need it to...
And about connections...I don't know what you are trying to do...but the database can handle more than 20 connections. Second...if you are not familiar with Oracle, and you write your code like it was SQL Server, then it will suck @$$ anyway...open a connection and keep it open and pool them.
Do you even know what the init.ora file is and have you even looked in it? Most problems actually arise from misconfiguration.
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Funny how our SQL Server doesn't need some high-priced consultant to come in to tell us how to make it work -- it just WORKS!
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[quote user="oracle_hater"]
Funny how our SQL Server doesn't need some high-priced consultant to come in to tell us how to make it work -- it just WORKS!
[/quote]
Isn't there some sort of ceiling on how well SQL performs with arbitrarily large data sets?
I know a certain airline company for their cost-analysis team uses oracle, because the database is on the scale of 13 terrabytes, and the database is located in another state.
Other than that caveat, i'd say stick with what works and don't let someone tell you to spend more money when your solution is already working. (E.G. you use your computer to print birthday cards 4 times a year... do you really need a new dell when your machine is working fine?) ((counter-example: would you use a computer for more than just making 4 birthday cards a year if it were newer?))
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when i said airline, i meant aerospace. it's late. :-)
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[quote user="oracle_hater"]
Funny how our SQL Server doesn't need some high-priced consultant to come in to tell us how to make it work -- it just WORKS!
[/quote]
Can't be much of a challenge if SQL Server fit's your needs. Why not stick with what your (obviously overpaid) database experts at your company can cope with?
Hope Oracle doesn't ruin this holiday ...
l.
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Long time lurker, first time poster 'cos this made me laugh. A lot.
When you say "turns out it was an Oracle problem after all!" ... what WAS the problem? What was the resolution? What bug(s) were involved? Is it reproducible?
What hardware is the instance running on?
What version of Oracle?
What does the spfile (or init file) look like?
What comes out in the alert log?
Any thing significant in the trace files (if any)?
FWIW, I've got databases with uptimes of excess of six months, that handle hundreds of simultaneous connections, and tens of thousands of record writes in very short period of times*, so I'd be VERY interested in knowing what - exactly - is crippling your system so badly.
* As have LOTS of dbas out there. This is by no means an unusual load for Oracle, or - usually - even particularly challenging.
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maybe they are running the database off a laptop with 128 MB of memory running windows 98.
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[quote user="tster"]maybe they are running the database off a laptop with 128 MB of memory running windows 98.[/quote]
I've used such a configuation a few years ago, it worked pretty well. There must be a different reason.
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@seraphim said:
Long time lurker, first time poster 'cos this made me laugh. A lot.
When you say "turns out it was an Oracle problem after all!" ... what WAS the problem? What was the resolution? What bug(s) were involved? Is it reproducible?
What hardware is the instance running on?
What version of Oracle?
What does the spfile (or init file) look like?
What comes out in the alert log?
Any thing significant in the trace files (if any)?
FWIW, I've got databases with uptimes of excess of six months, that handle hundreds of simultaneous connections, and tens of thousands of record writes in very short period of times*, so I'd be VERY interested in knowing what - exactly - is crippling your system so badly.
* As have LOTS of dbas out there. This is by no means an unusual load for Oracle, or - usually - even particularly challenging.
So how about it, oracle-hater? Any chance of seeing this information?
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Nothing, eh? Pity.
Well, absent any evidence of an actual bug I think this can be summed up neatly:
Incompetently configured Oracle instance and/or badly designed schema != Oracle is a "piece of shit database system"
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Dear oracle_hater,
Came across this forum and decided to join so that I could read more and understand the pain of so many who use Oracle. Just to let you know, my kind of toy resides in z/OS and it is DB2/udb as well as Unix DB2/udb. But for the most part, I work on large databases with real-time processing only because chicken shit products will never survive that sort of throughput in applications that have to do with this notion of processing.
As for Oracle? Well, I have heard stories from marketing reps telling DBAs to please simply reboot because it must be a problem with the client's work? when it truly was address leaking data from actual structured tables? YAUZA...imagine that sort of database in Criminal Justice HAHAHA!!!!
But in all, I do love to learn from different toys and that includes MS-SQL 2008; not a bad little toy; but it is Intel based, so they are F%#$@ed.
The only one thing I can say about DBAs in the Oracle world is that they find upgrading version of that piece of crap tentalizing (tormenting) so many do not even proceed to do it I have been told. So, I steer away from quasi-math....
Anyway, I wanted to thank you for giving me an awesome laugh as I read your posting hoping that you, yourself, can laugh with me to the atrocities created by products that are fighting so hard to stay afloat and compete with the big dogs and at the point of desperation drive around the city of San Francisco with a big blue dionasaur labeled "extinct".
Stay alive in the business; strength to your learning capabilities and awareness my friend. Those are my wishes.
Regards
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@oracle_hater said:
So thanks a lot Larry Ellison for this piece of shit. I'm really enjoying my holidays now!
Quoted to add the tag.
