Bill, show me the money!



  • Ok, this is the most comprehensive chain email I ever received. This has many, many WTFs inside:

    ---------- Forwarded message ----------
    From: i[]y@hotmail.it
    Date: Nov 21, 2006 2:38 PM
    Subject: FW: read the attachment! regards
    To: badpazzword@h[]l.com, badpazzword@g[]l.com, c[]8@hotmail.it, c[]7@hotmail.it, c[]o@hotmail.it, j[]y87@virgilio.it, l[]a@hotmail.it, s[]i@hotmail.com, s[]i@hotmail.it, s[]o@hotmail.it, a[]i@virgilio.it, b[]x@hotmail.it, c[]1@libero.it, d[]y@hotmail.it, f[]o@hotmail.com, g[]1@hotmail.it, g[]a@yahoo.it, n[]e@hotmail.it, s[]0@hotmail.it, s[]0@hotmail.it, b[]9@hotmail.it, c[]4@hotmail.it, c[]g@hotmail.it, c[]g@hotmail.com, c[]9@hotmail.it, f[]i@hotmail.it, g[]9@hotmail.it, g[]9@hotmail.it, k[]k@hotmail.it, l[]9@hotmail.it, p[]g@msn.com, p[]2@aliceposta.it, s[]g@hotmail.it, f[]-@hotmail.it, m[]a@passport.com, m[]9@msn.com, r[]7@msn.com, t[]s@hotmail.it







     
     From: m[]s@hotmail.it
    To: f[]4@hotmail.it, f[]e@aliceposta.com, f[]i@hotmail.it, f[]e.tara@virgilio.it, f[]a@hotmail.com, F[]9@hotmail.it, f[]a@hotmail.it, g[]a@hotmail.com, g[]l@hotmail.it, g[]e@msn.com, l[]i@sistelonline.it, g[]l@hotmail.it, g[]a@hotmail.it, g[]u@hotmail.it, g[]p@hotmail.it, g[]i@hotmail.it, h[]t@hotmail.it, H[]X@hotmail.it, i[]a@hotmail.com, i[]e@hotmail.it, i[]y@hotmail.it
    Subject: FW: read the attachment! regards
    Date: Mon, 20 Nov 2006 15:24:45 +0100








































     

    From: s[]z@hotmail.com> To: a[]o <k[]d@hotmail.com>, "a[]a@hotmail.com"<a[]a@hotmail.com>, a[]i <b[]4@libero.it>,"A[]W@hotmail.it" <a[] w@hotmail.it>, A[]a<a[]y@virgilio.it>, "b[]u@hotmail.com" <b[]u@hotmail.com>,"b[]e@hotmail.it" <b[]e@hotmail.it>,"c[]4@hotmail.com" <c[] 4@hotmail.com>, "c[]i@gmail.com"<c[]i@gmail.com>, "c[]t" <c[]y@libero.it>,c[]i <c[]i@hotmail.cm>, d[]i<e[]e@hotmail.com>, d[]i <s[] y@hotmail.it>,"d[]o@hotmail.it" <d[]o@hotmail.it>, "d[]8@hotmail.it"<d[]8@hotmail.it>, "e[]4@hotmail.it" <e[]4@hotmail.it>,E[]i <e[] 7@yahoo.it>, "e[]a@hotmail.it"<e[]a@hotmail.it>, f[]o <f[]b@hotmail.com>,"f[]a@yahoo.it" <f[]a@yahoo.it>, "f[]a@hotmail.com"<f[]a@hotmail.com>, "f[]e@hotmail.com"<f[]e@hotmail.com>, "g[]a@hotmail.it"<g[]a@hotmail.it>, "g[]s@hotmail.it" <g[]@hotmail.it>, G[]i <g[]7@hotmail.com>, G[]I <j[]z@libero.it>,K[]a <k[]a@virgilio.it>, "l[]7@hotmail.it"<l[]7@hotmail.it>, "l[]z@alice.it" <l[]z@alice.it>,"m[]s@hotmail.it" <m[]s@hotmail.it>, "m[]7@tele2.it"<m[]7@tele2.it>, "m[]s@hotmail.it" <m[]s@hotmail.it>, m[]a <m[]7@hotmail.com>, "m[]4@hotmail.it"<m[]4@hotmail.it>, s[]o <c[]1@libero.it>, "s[]8@hotmail.it"<s[]8@hotmail.it>, "s[]a@hotmail.com" <s[]a@hotmail.com>,"s[]a@hotmail.it" <s[]a@hotmail.it>
    Subject: FW: read the attachment! regards
    Date: Thu, 16 Nov 2006 20:10:41 +0100





    please leave me purgatorying



     
     From: f[]z@hotmail.it
    To: a[]a@libero.it; a[]y@virgilio.it; b[]p@ital[]s.com; c[]a.berzi@gmail.com; d[]o@hotmail.it; d[]7@hotmail.com; e[]e@hotmail.com; e[]a@hotmail.it; e[]7@inwind.it; f[]b@hotmail.com; j[]z@libero.it; i[]e@mclink.it; j[]a@yahoo.it; p[]i@matest.com; m[]i@uni[].it; m[]7@hotmail.com; n[]6@virgilio.it; p[]i@agrs.net; p[]t@email.it; c[]i@hotmail.com; p[]r@interia.pl; s[]i@yahoo.it; s[]i@virgilio.it; s[]7@hotmail.it; e[]7@yahoo.it; s[]z@hotmail.com; w[]7@hotmail.it; v[]7@yahoo.it; v[]7@yahoo.it; x[]8@msn.com
    Subject: FW: read the attachment! regards
    Date: Thu, 16 Nov 2006 19:30:08 +0100






     

    > From: b[]a.p@ital[]s.com
    > To: v[]a@libero.it; v[]a@libero.it; s[]z@hotmail.com; s[]i@virgilio.it; s[]i@virgilio.it; n[]6@virgilio.it; m[]i@hotmail.com; m[]7@hotmail.com; s[]e@g[]e.it; b[]7@hotmail.it; s[]o@hotmail.it; l[]i@hotmail.com; l[]6@hotmail.com; i[]e@mclink.it; j[]z@libero.it; f[]7@c[]r.it; e[]7@inwind.it; f[]z@hotmail.it; f[]b@hotmail.com; e[]7@yahoo.it; e[]e@hotmail.com; g[]d@ITAL[]S.COM; g[]o@aliceposta.it; d[]o@hotmail.it; c[]i@hotmail.com; x[]8@msn.com; s[]i@alice.it; a[]1@yahoo.it; a[]a@libero.it; s[]7@hotmail.it; g[]1@hotmail.it; p[]o@edilpedrengo.it
    > Subject: FW: FW: read the attachment! regards
    > Date: Thu, 16 Nov 2006 17:43:55 +0100
    >
    >
    > ----- Original Message -----
    > From: "L[]i" <b[]i.l@ITAL[]S.COM>
    > To: "A[]a" <a[]o@n[]n.com>; "a[]a"
    > <p[]o@e[]o.it>; "A[]i" <a[]i@r[]i.it>;
    > <c[]g@tin.it>; "E[]i" <e[]i@b[]p.it>;
    > <f[]s@b[]t>; "G[]i" <l[]a@t[]a.com>;
    > "G[]i" <m[]i@virgilio.it>; "m[]o"
    > <m[]o@i[]o.it>; "P[]a" <b[]p@i[]m>;
    > "P[]o" <p[]l@i[].com>; "R[]O"
    > <RO[]G@ITAL[]S.COM>; "S[]o"
    > <G[]i@m[]z.com>; <m[]g@i[]s.com>
    > Sent: Wednesday, November 15, 2006 9:31 AM
    > Subject: I: FW: FW: read the attachment! regards
    >
    >
    >
    >
    > L[]i
    > Italt[]s. s.p.a
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    > From: I[]a [mailto:customercare.[]@virgilio.it]
    > Sent: monday 13 november 2006 10.57
    > A: v[]i@tiscalinet.it; r[]s@g[]r.be; P[]o;
    > P[]o; p[]e@tiscalinet.it; R[]a; Opera; onda;
    > o[]l@skynet.be; M[]a; m[]i@rana.it;
    > m[]i@t[]s.it; E[]i; A[]e; M[]i;
    > m[]i@l[]n.it; M[]i, L[]o; m[]o@t[]t;
    > l[]i@v[]i.it; L[]o; D[]r; k[]a;
    > J[]k@g[]r.be; J[]e@g[]r.be;
    > info@e[]d.it; G[]i@t[]s.it;
    > G[]i/D[]EIT@d[]e.com; P[]o; N[]i;
    > L[]i; S[]i/D[]EIT; M[]r;
    > d[]o@t[]s.it; c[]o@t[]i.it; C[]i, M[]a; O[]a
    > C[]i; c[]o@libero.it; G[]o commerical off.; M[]i;
    > C[]w [G[]a]; C[]a, L[]a; F[]n;
    > S[]i/D[]EIT; L[]i; l[]i; m[]o;
    > a[]i@i[]e.net; a[]a@v[]i.it;
    > a[]i@v[]i.it; S[]a (E-mail);
    > pupils.a[]o@libero.it; a[]a@libero.it; d[]s;
    > F[]o
    > Oggetto: Fw: Fw: FW: FW: read the attachment! regards
    >
    >
    > read the attachment!
    > regards
    > R.F
    > - Should this message be received to you mistakenly, please send us a
    > notice via telefax or e-mail and destroy the mistakenly received message.
    > The above in respect of Dlgs 196/03 on personal data treatment. Thanks.-
    > ----- Original Message -----
    > From: r[]i@s[]v.com <mailto:r[]i@s[]v.com>
    > To: M[]e
    > <mailto:m[]i@c[]a.coop.i[]e.f[]i@c[]a.coop.
    > i[]e.f[]i> F[]à payments ; Z[]à Orders
    > <mailto:ordini@z[]a.it> ; Z[]à <mailto:g[]o@z[]a.it>


    < snipped 135 lines full of valid, mostly work email addresses >

    > p[]a@d[]o.it <mailto:p[]a@d[]o.it> ; P[]o
    > <mailto:p[]i@c[]a.c[]p.it> C[]i
    > Sent: Monday, November 13, 2006 9:43 AM
    > Subject: Ref: Fw: read the attachment! regards
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    > M[]i <m[]i@c[]a.c[]p.it
    > <mailto:m[]i@c[]a.c[]p.it> >
    >
    >
    > 07/11/2006 10.33
    >
    >
    > To:
    > M[]i <m[]i@c[]a.c[]p.it
    > <mailto:m[]i@c[]a.c[]p.it> >, P[]i
    > <p[]i@c[]a.c[]p.it
    > <mailto:p[]i@c[]a.c[]p.it> >,
    > d[]i@libero.it <mailto:d[]i@libero.it>,
    > N[]i <n[]i@c[]a.c[]p.it
    > <mailto:n[]i@c[]a.c[]p.it> >, g[]i@g[]a.com
    > <mailto:g[]i@g[]a.com> , r[]i@s[]v.com
    > <mailto:r[]i@s[]v.com> , p[]a@d[].it
    > <mailto:p[]a@d[]o.it> , g[]i@agents.i[]y.it
    > <mailto:g[]i@a[]y.it> , g[]i@tin.it
    > <mailto:g[]i@tin.it>
    >
    > CC
    >
    > Subject
    > Fw: read the attachment!regards
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    > "D[]G Srl" <d[]gsrl@d[]gsrl.191.it <mailto:d[]gsrl@d[]gsrl.191.it> >
    >
    >
    >
    > 07/11/2006 08.14
    >
    >
    > To: Z[]à payments <a[]o@z[]a.it
    > <mailto:a[]o@z[]a.it> >, Z[]i <o[]i@z[]a.it
    > <mailto:o[]i@z[]a.it> >, Z[]o <g[]o@z[]a.it
    > <mailto:g[]o@z[]a.it> >, Z[]à <m[]o@z[]a.it

    < snipped 187 lines full of valid, mostly work email addresses >

    > >, "A[]i" <a[]i@hotmail.com
    > <mailto:a[]i@hotmail.com> >, "A[]a" <a[]a@virgilio.it
    > <mailto:a[]a@virgilio.it> >
    > Cc:
    > Oggetto: Fw: read the attachment!regards
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    > ----- Original Message -----
    > From: "M[]i" <f[]3@virgilio.it <mailto:f[]3@virgilio.it>
    > >
    > To: <c[]t@libero.it <mailto:c[]t@libero.it> >; <info@a[]b.it
    > <mailto:info@a[]b.it> >; <info@s[]p.it <mailto:info@s[]p.it> >;
    > <info@t[]a.com <mailto:info@t[]a.com> >;
    > <s[]i@c[]t.it <mailto:s[]i@c[]t.it> >;
    > <s[]i@l[]o.it <mailto:s[]i@libero.it> >;
    > <t[]i@s[]a.it <mailto:t[]i@s[]a.it> >;
    > <ka[]1@virgilio.it <mailto:k[]1@virgilio.it> >;
    > <t[]3@virgilio.it <mailto:t[]3@virgilio.it> >;
    > <v[]a@hotmail.com <mailto:v[]a@hotmail.com> >;
    > <r[]i@libero.it <mailto:r[]i@libero.it> >;
    > <m[]i@tiscali.it <mailto:m[]i@tiscali.it> >;
    > <e[]o.srl@virgilio.it <mailto:e[]o.srl@virgilio.it> >; >;
    > <n[]b@b[]s.it <mailto:n[]b@b[]s.it> >
    > Sent: Monday, November 06, 2006 10:32 AM
    > Subject: I: read the attachment!regards
    >
    >
    >
    >
    > Oggetto: I: read the attachment!regards
    >
    >
    >
    > -----Original Message-----
    > Da: P[]l [mailto:P[]d@PC[]SRL.191.it]
    > Sent: friday 3 november 2006 11.52
    > To: Undisclosed-Recipient:;
    > Subject: Fw: read the attachment!regards
    >
    >
    >
    > __________ [] 1.1[] (20061102) INFORMATION
    >
    > This message has been checked by the [] Antivirus system
    > http://www.[].it <http://www.[].it>
    >
    >
    >
    >

    <snipped Italian disclaimers>

    >
    > Note: The information contained in this message may be privileged and
    > confidential and protected from disclosure. If the reader of this message is
    > not the intended recipient, or an employee or agent responsible for
    > delivering this message to the intended recipient, you are hereby notified
    > that any dissemination, distribution or copying of this communication is
    > strictly prohibited, according to art. 615 C.P. and Dlgs 196/2003. If you
    > have received this communication in error, please notify us immediately by
    > replying to the message and deleting it from your computer. Thank you.
    >

    <snipped Italian disclaimers>

    >
    > This message is confidential; its contents do not constitute a commitment by
    > the sender's society except where provided for in a written agreement
    > between you and sender's society.
    > Any unauthorised disclosure, use or dissemination, either whole or partial,
    > is prohibited. If you are not the intended recipient of the message, please
    > notify the sender immediately.
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    > No virus found in this incoming message.
    > Checked by [].
    > Version: [] / Virus Database: [] - Release Date: 07/11/05
    >

     

     Try Live.com: []
     

     Send messages []. It's free!





     

     Ideas for your trips...





    ____________________
     Satisfy your sports need!

     
    Before we get to the attachment:
    * "Leave me purgatorying" (sic) has not been translated.
    * Some email addresses / addresses have been translated.
    * The european data format applies above: dd/mm/yyyy

    And: I do know there are typos, syntax errors, verbose expressions in the text below. They are (mostly) intentional.

    And now, the Attachment:

    Dear Friends,

    Read this letter and act quicly.

    I'm sending you this letter, because this information has been sent to me from a professionist and dear friend.

    Microsoft and AOL, today's biggest Internet companies, to grant Internet Explorer the most used program seat, have tested the beta version of this program.

    When you'll send this email to your friends, Microsoft will check it (provided they use Microsoft Windows) 4 2 weeks. Microsoft will pay you 245€ (296$) for each person you will email this message. Microsoft will pay you 243$ (294$) for each email forwardated and for each thrid person who will receive your communication, Microsoft will pay 241€ (292$).

    In two weeks, Microsoft will contact you via e-mail send you the cheque.

    Since from the beginning I doubted until, two weeks after I sent such communication, I received via email the comunication and some days after a cheque worth 24800 € (300000 $)

    You absolutely have to send this communication before the testing of the beta version of Internet Explorer ends.

    He who can afford all of this is Mister Bill Gates.

    All marketing expensenses are on him.
     
     

    So now Bill is supposed to send in around 287'000€ (348'000$) to the 12 senders above for the around 600 people contacted (sorry, P[]d@PC[]SRL.191.it, I'm afraid Undisclosed-Recipient won't make the cut).

    Extra fun bit: check the virus definition date.



  • OMFG! That is such an ancient chain e-mail. I got that when I was an
    AOL member back in the 90's. I want to smack the hell out of people who
    are so friggin' gullible that they still fall for this crap.
    Everyone should know that Microsoft doesn't pay anyone for anything,
    especially e-mail forwards. They have plenty of people begging to try
    out stuff for free (just look at all the "gotta have Vista Beta!"
    people). ARGH! I'm so frustrated now.. 

    EDIT: I had to go find the Snopes article for this one:  http://www.snopes.com/inboxer/nothing/microsoft-aol.asp

    <font color="#000000" face="Trebuchet MS,Bookman Old Style,Arial" size="3">"has been circulating in one form or another since 1997</font>"



  • I get 10 of those every month. The real WTF here is that someone took the time to replace all the email addresses and hosts...



  • [quote user="PlasmaHH"]I get 10 of those every month. The real WTF
    here is that someone took the time to replace all the email addresses
    and hosts...[/quote]

     I hope that it was done with an automated anonymizer! LOL



  • What I love about these, aside from the fact that what they are claiming is actually impossible, is that nowhere in the e-mail text can you find the original e-mail from AOL or Microsoft.



  • This reminds me of every other email I get from my mother, because it can't hurt "just in case" it's true.

     

     

     

     



  • I remember when I was a kid downloading txt files from fidonet nodes at 1200 baud... I got GETRICH.TXT or somesuch, duly sent off my one english pound coins to the previous 3 people on the list....


    It'd be nice if not everyone was that naive but a friend had the finance director of a blue chip company on the phone asking what he should do about the nigerian man who needed use of his bank account to transfer 20 odd squillion dollars.  boggle

    People who send me chain letters get told "thanks for giving me all your friends friends friends friends email addresses"



  • [quote user="versatilia"]People who send me chain letters get told
    "thanks for giving me all your friends friends friends friends email
    addresses"[/quote]

    I did that, but replied to all and stated that
    due to the graciousness of their friend, I now have all of their
    addresses and to look forward to even more spam. I've never heard from
    any of them as to if they railed on the sender or not.

    Likewise,
    Bellsouth Webtunes (actually the company providing the service),
    e-mails all accounts with regular "To" and "CC" when account
    information is rejected. I had cancelled my bank account and went with
    another bank. I hadn't gotten around to changing Webtunes, so when
    renewal came, it sent me an e-mail. I was shocked to see all of the
    other addresses in there. I promptly sent them a flaming e-mail and
    told them where they could stuff their service. 



  • [quote user="PlasmaHH"]I get 10 of those every month. The real WTF here is that someone took the time to replace all the email addresses and hosts...[/quote]

     I usually respond quickly with a snopes link and a rather blunt 'don't spread misinformation' email.  Last time I did that, the original sender promptly sent an apology with said snopes link to everyone he'd forwarded the chain letter to.
     



  • [quote user="merreborn"]

    [quote user="PlasmaHH"]I get 10 of those every month. The real WTF here is that someone took the time to replace all the email addresses and hosts...[/quote]

     I usually respond quickly with a snopes link and a rather blunt 'don't spread misinformation' email.  Last time I did that, the original sender promptly sent an apology with said snopes link to everyone he'd forwarded the chain letter to.
     

    [/quote]

     

    I did that to my grandma once. Then I felt bad 😞

     

    She stopped sending me forwards though. 



  • There was an article a while ago in Wired where they tracked down the person who actually started the "money for email" chain letters.



  • i just about lost a friend once because i told the tech-vapid woman to stop sending me chain mails  



  • I have purposefully lost "friends" due to that. If they can't wise up, then I don't need them dragging me down.

    Usually, though, the people responsible for sending that type of thing to me are inept coworkers and people I've bought stuff off of eBay from. I really jumped all over the eBay person's case. I told them that they better remove all traces of my address from their system as I don't want to get barraged with virus mails the next time they pull something stupid.
     



  • Either send back a blatantly sarcastic reply, or state that for every chain letter you get forwarded, you will respond with ten more filled with gay porn pictures. God knows that they're probably using outlook, and if not, you can always do ascii goatse.



  • [quote user="unklegwar"]

    This reminds me of every other email I get from my mother, because it can't hurt "just in case" it's true.

    [/quote]<font size="+1">H</font>ow does she react to letters, typed in ALL CAPS, from the spouses of deceased Nigerian oil ministers who want to get 20 million dollars out of their country?


  • [quote user="Volmarias"]send back a blatantly sarcastic reply[/quote]

    Alas, some people just do not get it. I had a friend who seemed IRL to be
    a perfectly reasonable person. I made the mistake of giving her my email
    address and for the next year I got at least one chain letter per month.
    Each time I would respond saying either "This is a scam. Here is an article
    that explains why this can't work. Don't send me any more of these, and
    don't send them to anybody else either, because it's just a waste of
    everyone's time." or "I know you like me, we're friends. You do not need
    to send me every chain letter you recieve about friendship. In fact, they
    annoy me, so please don't."

    Each time she ignored this and sent me another one anyway my replies
    became more, shall we say, curt. Eventually I finally got a very upset
    response telling me how rude I was and that no one else believed me when
    I said that the mails were scams and that I should be glad to recieve
    chain letters.

    I haven't recieved any mail from her since, but judging by her formerly
    demonstrated attention span she'll probably forget about it and start
    mailing me again.


    Wallsy.



  • [quote user="Wallsy"]... and that I should be glad to recieve chain letters[/quote]

    hehe classic, what a pal :¬)



  • From : http://www.herohog.com/chainletters.html

    Hello, my name is Basmati Kasaar. I am suffering from rare and deadly diseases, poor scores on final exams, extreme virginity, fear of being kidnapped and executed by anal electrocution, and guilt for not forwarding out 50 billion chain letters sent to me by people who actually believe that if you send them on, then that poor 6 year old girl in Arkansas with a breast on her forehead will be able to raise enough money to have it removed before her redneck parents sell her off to the travelling freak show.

    Do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give you and everyone you send "his" email to $1000? How stupid are you? Ooooh, lookyhere! If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I'll get laid by every Playboy model in the magazine! What a bunch of bull.

    So basically, this message is a big SCREW YOU to all the people out there who have nothing better to do than to send me stupid chain mail forwards.

    Maybe the evil chain letter leprechauns will come into my apartment and sodomize me in my sleep for not continuing the chain which was started by Jesus in 5 A.D. and was brought to this country by midget pilgrims on the Mayflower and if it makes it to the year 2000, it'll be in the Guinness Book of World Records for longest continuous streak of blatant stupidity.

    Screw them.

    If you're going to forward something, at least send me something mildly amusing. I've seen all the "send this to 50 of your closest friends, and this poor, wretched excuse for a human being will somehow receive a nickel from some omniscient being" forwards about 90 times. I don't care. Show a little intelligence and think about what you're actually contributing to by sending out forwards. Chances are it's your own unpopularity.

    THE FOUR BASIC TYPES OF CHAIN LETTERS:

    Chain Letter Type 1:

    (scroll down)

    Make a wish!!!

    No, really, go on and make one!!!

    Oh please, they'll never go out with you!!!

    Wish something else!!!

    Not that, you pervert!!

    Is your finger getting tired yet?

    STOP!!!!

    Wasn't that fun? 🙂

    Hope you made a great wish 🙂

    Now, to make you feel guilty, here's what I'll do. First of all, if you don't send this to 5096 people in the next 5 seconds, you will be raped by a mad goat and thrown off a high building into a pile of manure.

    It's true!

    Because, THIS letter isn't like all of those fake ones, THIS one is TRUE!!

    Really!!!

    Here's how it goes:

    *Send this to 1 person: One person will be pissed off at you for sending them a stupid chain letter. *Send this to 2-5 people: 2-5 people will be pissed off at you for sending them a stupid chain letter.

    *Send this to 5-10 people: 5-10 people will be pissed off at you for sending them a stupid chain letter, and may form a plot on your life.

    *Send this to 10-20 people: 10-20 people will be pissed off at you for sending them a stupid chain letter and will firebomb your house.

    Thanks!!!! Good Luck!!!

    Chain Letter Type 2:

    Hello, and thank you for reading this letter. You see, there is a starving little boy in Baklaliviatatlaglooshen who has no arms, no legs, no parents, and no goats.

    This little boy's life could be saved, because for every time you pass this on, a dollar will be donated to the Little Starving Legless Armless Goatless Boy from Baklaliviatatlaglooshen Fund. Oh, and remember, we have absolutely no way of counting the emails sent and this is all a complete load of bull. So go on, reach out. Send this to 5 people in the next 47 seconds.

    Oh, and a reminder - if you accidentally send this to 4 or 6 people, you will die instantly. Thanks again!!

    Chain Letter Type 3:

    Hi there!! This chain letter has been in existence since 1897. This is absolutely incredible because there was no email then and probably not as many sad jerks with nothing better to do.

    So this is how it works: Pass this on to 15,067 people in the next 7 minutes or something horrible will happen to you like:

    *Bizarre Horror Story #1 Miranda Pinsley was walking home from school on Saturday. She had recently received this letter and ignored it. She then tripped in a crack in the sidewalk, fell into the sewer, was gushed down a drainpipe in a flood of poopie, and went flying out over a waterfall. Not only did she smell nasty, she died. This Could Happen To You!!!

    Bizarre Horror Story #2 Dexter Bip, a 13 year old boy, got a chain letter in his mail and ignored it. Later that day, he was hit by a car and so was his boyfriend (hey, some people swing that way). They both died and went to hell and were cursed to eat adorable kittens every day for eternity. This Could Happen To You Too!!

    Remember, you could end up just like Pinsley and Bip. Just send this letter to all of your loser friends, and everything will be okay.

    Chain Letter Type 4:

    As if you care, here is a poem that I wrote. Send it to every one of your friends.

    Friends

    A friend is someone who is always at your side, A friend is someone who likes you even though you stink, and your breath smells like you've been eating catfood,

    A friend is someone who likes you even though you're as ugly as a hat full of assholes,

    A friend is someone who cleans up for you after you've soiled yourself, A friend is someone who stays with you all night while you cry about your sad, sad life,

    A friend is someone who pretends they like you when they really think you should be raped by mad chimpanzees, then thrown to vicious dogs,

    A friend is someone who scrubs your toilet, vacuums and then gets the check and leaves and doesn't speak much English... no, sorry that's the cleaning lady,

    A friend is not someone who sends you chain letters because he wants his wish of being rich to come true.

    Now pass this on! If you don't, you'll never have sex ever again.

    ------------------------------------------------------

    The point being?

    If you get some chain letter that's threatening to leave you shagless or luckless for the rest of your life, delete it. If it's funny, send it on.

    Don't piss people off by making them feel guilty about a leper in Botswana with no teeth, who's been tied to a dead elephant for 27 years, whose only saviour is the 5 cents per letter he'll receive if you forward this mail, otherwise you'll end up like Miranda. Right? Now forward this to everyone you know otherwise you'll have to look at me naked!

     by Dennis Leary (language slightly cleaned up)



  • [quote user="Wallsy"]
    I haven't recieved any mail from her since, but judging by her formerly
    demonstrated attention span she'll probably forget about it and start
    mailing me again.
    [/quote]

    Ah, but you're not thinking like a BOFH.

    Next time she sends you a chain letter, tell her that you're ignoring it.

    A day later, make it start to "come true". If it says something like "IF YOU DON'T PASS THIS ON TO 1087321 PEOPLE YOUR BALLS WILL SHRIVEL UP AND FALL OFF," tell her that you've been feeling uncomfortable lately. A day after that, mention that you're sure that it has to do with that chain letter.

    Faking ANYTHING from the emergency room will do wonders for believability.

    "Forward" the chain letter to her, and spoof the To field for a bunch of other people, and tell her that you're sorry you never passed it on. However, your symptoms need to continue to deteriorate. Tell her that you're feeling terrible, and that someone has been watching you.

    You've been getting strange emails lately.

    Bizarre emails.

    Emails with no subject, and nonsense words in them.

    Emails with stock tips in animated gifs.

    These emails started out random enough, but they're starting to get personal. They're speaking to you by name. "Wallsy, buy XFHG! Put it on your radar! It's going to explode!" they say. "Wallsy, why didn't you buy XFHG? Where is your radar?" Innocent, but yet they get worse. "Wallsy, who lives at 1537 Mockingbird Lane, buy XFHG! Or else!"

    "Buy" some XFHG. Just doodle in paint and print it out. It'll be good enough.

    Forward the emails to her. Tell her that you're so sorry you never forwarded those emails, and never believed in them, so now you're going to forward every email to her. Tell her that you've set it up so that you don't even have to see them. You're just going to forward them to her automatically.

    Magically, your nuts unshrivel. Possibly it's because the curse in the chain letter has ended. Equally possible is that you're forwarding 100 Pump & Dump spams to her each day, ensuring financial ruin. Regardless, she'll probably block you altogether, and possibly never talk to you again. But hey. You have to win, and when you have to win, you have it do it totally.

    Ok, so maybe that was more SomethingAwful than BOFH, but you get the (slightly kafkaesque) picture.



  • [quote user="Volmarias"][quote user="Wallsy"]
    I haven't recieved any mail from her since, but judging by her formerly
    demonstrated attention span she'll probably forget about it and start
    mailing me again.
    [/quote]

    Ah, but you're not thinking like a BOFH.

    Next time she sends you a chain letter, tell her that you're ignoring it.

    ...
    [/quote]

    It'd be quite a bit quicker and simpler to just sign her up for a few spam lists.

    If you're a real dick, sign up for a free email (jetemail.net comes to mind), sign yourself up to a number of spamlists, and have your client forward and delete everything that comes into the account. That way it'll bypass the junk filtering, and having your name on it will make it more personally satisfying.

    Or just blacklist her and call it a day, I suppose. 



  • @Volmarias said:

    Ah, but you're not thinking like a BOFH.

    I would have thought the BOFH would blackmail her by sending chain-mail letters back at her that trick her into being his/her personal slave or some such. 'You must be extremely kind to everyone you know, you must also forward this to everyone on your mail list and someone you don't know, if yuo don't you will be snail mailed the plague and cnancer; buttons will appeasr in you're door-step".



  • I once got such an email forwared from someone who happened to be the head of the IT department in a company with ~2000 employees. Of course he had sent it to some of his employess, too. He who is responsible for the corporate network actively enganges in cloging it with silly chain mails!



  • This reminds me of the time, at university, when some student decided to forward one of these "Microsoft is giving away free money" scams... to everyone with names starting in "A" through "C" listed in the university's LDAP server. (And I think they only stopped there because the mail client they were using didn't allow them to fit any more addresses in the 'to' field.)



  • It's even funnier that people believe there is a way to easily track email forwarding. Not only you can't track, if you could, you'd still have to go through frauds with people faking forwards to get more of that fictional money.

     I have a cousin who fell for a scam, costing her mom some lots of money. And then she was scolded by her family and mine, especially by me. Guess what, one month later, she fell for the very same scam again. The text in the second scam was the same from first time, verbatim. Sometimes I lose my hope for humanity.



  • [quote user="Renan "C#" Sousa"]

    Sometimes I lose my hope for humanity.

    [/quote]

    Why did you even have any? Were you high? 



  • @asuffield said:

    [quote user="Renan "C#" Sousa"]Sometimes I lose my hope for humanity.

    Why did you even have any? Were you high?[/quote]

    Try not to jump in front of a train just yet. There's a world of people to insult.



  • [quote user="Renan "C#" Sousa"]It's even funnier that people believe there is a way to easily track email forwarding. Not only you can't track...[/quote]

    I wouldn't be so sure of that... Here's a discussion I had with someone who forwarded me a version of this some years ago...


    > > This thing started out being IBM, then IBM and Microsoft, then
    > > Microsoft only, and I've even got one claiming that JAG is giving a
    > > free pair of jeans per email! AOL seems to have deeper pockets than
    > > anyone else that I've seen, though.
    > >
    > > The scary thing is that they could track the email, though. There
    > > are several publicised techniques for tracking emails once they are
    > > sent.

    > Thanks, mate.  What are the ways of tracking that you describe,
    > and how does it benefit the people who send them?

    This is mostly a rant, and some scare-tactics - I've just read through it, and it probably comes under spare time reading... just remember, this is all theoretical - I would never do such a thing (looks slyly side to side 😉

    There are two easy ways that immediately come to mind - both involve HTML emails, and work with most modern email programs.

    The easiest is to create an HTML email (you can do this with your version of outlook: select the "Formatted" or "Rich Text" option), which includes an image from a web site you control, or can get the logs from.  When the mail program gets the email, it goes to the web site to get the image, and this is recorded in the site log. If the email links to the web site, you can track the viewer's behaviour on the site, and analyse what effect the email had on their usage patterns. If you use cookies, you can potentially track their movements across multiple visits, if this is of interest; you probably don't need this unless you're running a "dotcom". Also, if you're a major, international provider of advertising (DoubleClick, AdForce, LinkExchange), or a Great And Powerful Master Of The Computing World, And Owner Of A Giant Network Of Linked Sites (Micro$haft's MSN/Passport), you can track someone's internet usage before/after such an email. Again, not something useful to your average Joe, but possible, nonetheless.

    This is how spam sites track you - when you read the spam, which usually is an HTML formatted email, it retrieves the product photo from the web. If a lot of such requests are generated by a small range of internet addresses, (such as a single ISP, or a person's permanent internet connection) then they will be a suitable target for more undercooked meat.

    While this tells method you who received the email, it doesn't track which person forwarded it on.  So this is of limited usefulness for the purposes described in the original email.

    Another possibility is the use of embedded scripts in the email. This is another HTML email feature, and allows you to create emails with all the trimmings of a website: drop-down menus, fancy animations, etc. It also allows you to grab details, like the sender's name, and include them in requests to the server (like the image request). So instead of getting the image http://cool-site.com/image.gif, you get the image http://cool-site.com/image.gif?sender@email.address., and this shows up in your logs.  Very useful. Still no business need for it though. (Legitimate business need, that is - violation of privacy not counted.) If there is anyone out there using this technique, they soon won't be - newer versions of Outlook/Netscape Mail (which are the main supporters of Javascript in email) ship with the options turned off by default.

    In either case, the image requested need not be noticable: there is a vast network of affiliate web sites (I think it's run by Barnes & Noble), that use a plain white image, 1 pixel high by 1 pixel wide, to record your behaviour on their web sites. This would make B&N, (or whoever it was), able to provide a "customised" offer based on your browsing habits. They haven't linked it to any emails yet, that I've noticed - but it could be done.

    Neither of these methods are 100% reliable. There are many people who have the necessary options for HTML emails, Javascript or cookies turned off, or who use less common programs which do not support them at all (like myself).  This makes them immune from these techniques.

    If you restrict the technology you use this on - like limiting it to users of the operating system and email program you wrote - then you have a much better chance. You can make your email program keep a log of every email incoming or outgoing, summarize it, and transmit it back to you in a coded form, when the operating system does it's default "critical updates" system check. This would give you everything - but it comes across as wildly unethical. I'm not claiming that any Major Software Giant (with an enormous almost-technology-illiterate userbase who won't ever notice this kind of invasion) would ever do such a thing, but who knows?

    If you could come up with a plausible reason to need this in a relatively closed environment (like within an organisation), it could be done more reliably. A Lotus Note can include scripts which are much harder to turn off - and these scripts can be used much like Javascript.  In fact, since Lotus Notes is a much more trused environment than regular email, with all messages digitally signed, etc, these scripts are less restricted than javascript, and can do more - like directly contacting someone, and sending messages/memos to others. This is how the "Yes, I'm in", "No I'm busy" buttons worked in [BigCorp where we previously worked together], for example.  So a manager could send a memo out to his team, and include a script to check if anyone forwarded it, how far it went... (as long as it stayed within that environment).

    That's probably waaayyy more than you wanted to get in reply, but I'm in a detailed frame of mind. Sorry if I've bored you to tears!

    And then late last year, while reading about the HP privacy invasion fiasco, I came across a site which provides a notification service for your sent email: http://www.readnotify.com/readnotify/about.asp (it's scary the amount of detail they claim to be able to track...)



  • Yeah, but both methods are exploitable (you could fake forwardings for money if you could change your IP really fast). The technical limitations, like needing the email receivers to have enabled javascript, are already mentioned. Finally, I once made a mail client that would download images in html emails and attach the image to the email, supressing the image tag, should I forward html emails. I did so because I wouldn't give people red x's on a suare should the images be moved, but you see how it kills of the first method?



  • [quote user="Renan "C#" Sousa"]Yeah, but both methods are exploitable (you could fake forwardings for money if you could change your IP really fast). The technical limitations, like needing the email receivers to have enabled javascript, are already mentioned. Finally, I once made a mail client that would download images in html emails and attach the image to the email, supressing the image tag, should I forward html emails. I did so because I wouldn't give people red x's on a suare should the images be moved, but you see how it kills of the first method?[/quote] Agreed - the methods aren't foolproof, and are much less robust these days... Still, the it's dangerous to say "can't be tracked" when many people could be, quite trivially, and without them even noticing.


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