The [Gross PICTURE OF A COW]orkers Thread



  • There's a guy in my office who has (I'm guessing) some kind of OCD. Every now and then he'll take his shoes off and then swap his socks over, maybe he wants them to wear out evenly, who knows? The worst part is he's been here forever, so while I'm sat at my desk like

    no one else seems to mind.

    Does anyone else have to put up with shit like this?



  • His habit is slightly odd.

    Your reaction to it is much more odd.

    Nobody else seems to mind because why would they? Most people have more important things to worry about.



  • I have a guy who sits right next to me - right next to, as in, at a conference table - and he keeps sniffling up his snot in the loudest, most disgusting way. He's been doing it since I got there, so I guess it's not a cold, maybe it's allergies? Or maybe he just never blows his fucking nose, so he's still sucking up snot from 5 years ago? The one way, I was so repulsed that I would convulse every time he did it. And then I became hyper sensitive to all the other noises around me, other people sniffling (much more quietly, but now I'm hyper sensitive), shifting in their squeaky seats, even breathing started to bother me. Someone opened a can of pop and it felt like a cannon going off. I couldn't do anything - I couldn't get any work done, I totally lost my appetite. I felt sick. I didn't eat the whole day and left work feeling exhausted and had a terrible headache all beacuse that motherfucker keeps sniffling his snot like a child and won't blow his fucking nose oh my god does he have any self awareness at all what the fuck is wrong with him if he does it again I'm going to slice his fucking face open HOLY SHIT!!!

    no one else seems to mind.



  • There's a woman in the office who randomly pulls her chair out, gets under her desk, pulls the chair back in and has a nap.
    It's not weirdness I have to witness as she's luckily in a different bit of the office. She's a bit of a space invader so avoiding her generally is best.



  • Heh, that would almost be me. The AC in the office is somehow murderous to me, so the moment I step in, I get a horrible case of running nose, to the point that I can go through a whole damn box of tissues on a particularly bad day. The moment I leave, I'm fine again.

    I consider that my revenge on the guy next to me, who when he's not munching on something, breathes through his mouth like a sumo wrestler during a kinky sex session.


  • SockDev

    @loopback0 said:

    There's a woman in the office who randomly pulls her chair out, gets under her desk, pulls the chair back in and has a nap.

    well that's odd. but i guess as long as she's getting her work done and stuff not too bad.

    the space invader though. that needs to be dealt with in the same way we deal with them in that MAME game.



  • She just needs to fuck off to be honest. Everyone's too nice to tell her to back off.



  • @Bort said:

    And then I became hyper sensitive to all the other noises around me, other people [...]

    Misophonia.

    http://journal.frontiersin.org/Journal/10.3389/fnhum.2013.00296/full

    The interviews further revealed an interesting effect of the role of context on aversive responses. For instance, eight of our misophonics report eating and chewing sounds (severely offensive triggers associated with rudeness when produced by human adults) will not bother them nearly as much if produced by animals or babies (see Table 1). One individual described that, as these individuals have little control over their actions and “don't know any better,” it helps in cancelling out strong aversive feelings.

    Knowing there's a word for it, and that others are actually affected , tend to help some with the symptoms.



  • @PJH said:

    the symptoms.

    Of trolling?


  • SockDev

    @loopback0 said:

    Everyone's too nice to tell her to back off.

    well isn't that what we do in space invaders?



  • @boomzilla said:

    Of trolling?

    No - the utter, utter hate you have towards your co-worker who not only won't stop eating, but seems incapable of doing it fucking quietly.



  • Nothing too terrible here, except for paper airplanes. I hate when I'm deeply focused and suddenly a paper plane flies into my cubicle and lands in my coffee.



  • @PJH said:

    eating, but seems incapable of doing it fucking quietly.

    People who eat loudly really irritates me. It's not fucking necessary and when they're doing it it's all I can focus on. Luckily there's only one colleague I regularly see who does it, and I often just go for a smoke or to get some food or something elsewhere.



  • @PJH said:

    No - the utter, utter hate you have towards your co-worker who not only won't stop eating, but seems incapable of doing it fucking quietly.

    Oh, I get that. I just don't believe @Bort's story. Because I never believe any of his stories. I like them, though.



  • @PJH said:

    babies

    That's because they're fucking annoying in their own right, eating or not.



  • @Maciejasjmj said:

    That's because they're fucking annoying in their own right, eating or not.

    BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO



  • @PJH said:

    No - the utter, utter hate you have towards your co-worker who not only won't stop eating, but seems incapable of doing it fucking quietly.

    In fact, I'll just re-post this:

    PJH:
    Lorne Kates:
    FrostCat: 8. Do programmers have quiet working conditions?
    This one's not too bad. Except for when anyone's on the phone. Or discussing. Or being yelled at. Or typing. However, I do have ear phones,...
    Or they eating, scraping the last remenents off the crockery for 5 minutes. Or burping afterwards.

    Or on their own ear phones listening to their music and are pretending they're in the band they're listening to and using their desk as a percussive instrument. Loudly.

    Or, knowing the (I'm assuming false) floor reverberates, and they tromp around like a lost heffalump every time they move from their seat. To talk to someone. To go to the toilet to wipe/wash their hands after they've sneezed snot into them because they don't have tissues near by (more than 5 times a week.) To go feeding (see above) and come back etc.

    Oh, and annoying ringtones on their mobiles. And they get called more than once a day. And leave their mobile on their desk when they decide to 'wander off' for 1/2 hour.

    And that's just the bloke who's next to me in the office. There are 6 of us in that little bit of 'open office.' Thankfully the other 4 aren't quite as annoying, though whether that's function of distance or they simply aren't as bad, I'm not sure.


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    Suggested rename: The Gross Cow-orkers Thread


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    Y'all're making me feel better about the coworkers in the last several places I worked. Except that one woman who was having hot flashes and put the AC on extra-cold no matter how many times she was told to stop it, so the rest of us were forced to wear jackets indoors in the summer in Dallas.



  • @antiquarian said:

    Suggested rename

    Since when is it necessary to suggest a rename around here? YMBNH.



  • I once got written up and "counseled" because a cow orker complained about hearing me trimming my fingernails. Not seeing the clippings scattered about the floor, not watching me do it, just hearing the tik, tik, tik of the clippers working, on the far side of three cubicle dividers.

    $deity knows what she would have done if I ever blew my nose.



  • That is a LOT more annoying than switching socks. Why the hell would you clip your fingernails at work? Did you bring in an electric shaver, too? Maybe a nose hair clipper?

    Do that shit at home.



  • @da_Doctah said:

    I once got written up and "counseled" because a cow orker complained about hearing me trimming my fingernails. Not seeing the clippings scattered about the floor, not watching me do it, just hearing the tik, tik, tik of the clippers working, on the far side of three cubicle dividers.

    Did you learn to fucking groom yourself at home? I mean it's ridiculous to get written up for that, but I understand the complaint.


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @blakeyrat said:

    That is a LOT more annoying than switching socks

    Really? I do it sometimes, but I only do a couple fingers at a time for some reason, so it's only a couple of clicks. Plus, I have an office. But before we reconfigured our office, when I was in a mini-cube farm, most of my co-workers did much more annoying things, like the guy next to me, who would get mad at customers and slam his keyboard into the desk, or the idiot who yelled into her speakerphone during customer meetings instead of using a fucking headset (which she still does, but thankfully she has an office now too.)


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @monkeyArms said:

    Did you learn to fucking groom yourself at home? I mean it's ridiculous to get written up for that, but I understand the complaint.

    I have to admit, I really don't. Especially not in the context of a post where people are cud-chewing and mucus-snorting (and nobody's mentioned it, but you know we're also talking about shit like bathing in patchouli.)



  • @FrostCat said:

    I have to admit, I really don't. Especially not in the context of a post where people are cud-chewing and mucus-snorting (and nobody's mentioned it, but you know we're also talking about shit like bathing in patchouli.)

    I find the sound of fingernail clippers incredibly annoying (glad to know there's a word for it having read this thread). Also I don't really want to think about parts previously attached to a person flying off around me.



  • @monkeyArms said:

    Also I don't really want to think about parts previously attached to a person flying off around me.

    Like their heads....? :imp: <!-- yes - I know what you meant -->



  • Fingernails are magnetic to beverages, so the chances of one flying into your coffee are high.

    I can't complaint about anyone around me except for the stupid Nerf wars. Luckily we have a lot of 40'' TVs around here, so I can bunker my self out of harm's way.

    One thing I found strange is in the northern European countries (UK, Sweden, Norway, Finland) I visited, some people walk around without shoes. At least in Finland they use this colorful wool socks.



  • I recommend some 3M™ PELTOR™ Optime™ IIIs:

    Filed under: safety equipment


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @monkeyArms said:

    Also I don't really want to think about parts previously attached to a person flying off around me.

    That's disgusting, yes. Who would do that? I always try to catch the clippings and put 'em in the trash, if for no other reason than you don't want to step on one of those when you're walking around barefoot!


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @Eldelshell said:

    Luckily we have a lot of 40'' TVs around here, so I can bunker my self out of harm's way.

    You would think building a fort out of 40" TVs would get expensive.


  • SockDev

    @FrostCat said:

    You would think building a fort out of 40" TVs would get expensive.

    only if they're all working TVs you can get broken ones practically for free



  • I was thinking one of these:



  • Synchronicity. Just found this recent relevant thread on another forum.





  • @Eldelshell said:

    One thing I found strange is in the northern European countries (UK, Sweden, Norway, Finland) I visited, some people walk around without shoes. At least in Finland they use this colorful wool socks.

    Taking the bait: not at work, we don't. Of course I cannot vouch for Finland or Norway, we cast one off in 1809 and the other in 1905.



  • ar15.com? Seriously?


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @blakeyrat said:

    ar15.com? Seriously?

    Arfcom's got some funny shit on it by spells. (I don't read the site, myself, just funny links like this when I see 'em.)



  • Suuure. And you buy Playboy for the articles.



  • Oh yeah, Arfcom is like TDWTF but with way more toxicity, trolling, and conspiracy theories. Hilarious site. Jeff would like it.


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @blakeyrat said:

    Suuure. And you buy Playboy for the articles.

    Believe what you want.



  • Kind of, and much of them are pretty new too, but still cheaper than all that would cost if I went postal at work.



  • I hate it when people bring in strongly smelling food from home and then put it in the microwaves and bring it back to their desks and generally stink up the whole office floor so I can't really do anything other than try to discreetly hold my nose or invent some reason not to be at my desk for the next 30 minutes while the stench of horrible weird home-food dissipates. I always go home for lunch, or buy a sandwich out of consideration for other people in the office. Nobody wants to smell your awful homemade food.

    While I'm at it, stop offering me homemade cookies as well. Buy some from the store like a normal person if you want to share!



  • @tar said:

    bring it back to their desks

    That. We have a kitchen, dammit. I understand if it's a cup of coffee or some water, but Jesus Christ, there's a damn room specifically for eating, so get that lunch, take a five-minute break and eat it in peace.



  • @Maciejasjmj said:

    ...but Jesus Christ, there's a damn room specifically for eating, so get that lunch, take a five-minute break and eat it in peace.

    But, but, but.... I don't like the smell of other peoples' food when they're also eating.
    ­
    Besides my food doesn't smell.

    ... is one of the answers I almost had.



  • Fuck the people who bring fish to the office, even if they eat only in the kitchen, the fucking microwave will stench.


  • Fake News

    The First World Problems thread is over :twisted_rightwards_arrows: :arrows_counterclockwise:



  • Unfortunately, we can only nest categories, not threads.


  • Fake News

    @boomzilla said:

    [s]Unfortunately[/s]Luckily, we can only nest categories, not threads or everything would merge into the Likes Thread.

    FTFY



  • @JBert said:

    everything would merge into the Likes Thread.

    And that would be bad?

    :trollface:


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