📖 Teh Oﬃcial Discopædia (Forums Dictionary)

abarker

This is the Official Discopædia.

Only definitions should be added to this topic. Discussion regarding this topic should be handled in Teh Official Discopædia Meta. Any non-definitions will be jeffed to that topic.

All new definitions must contain a citation of a previous usage in order to be wikified and indexed as a discodefinition. Definitions will be wikified and indexed as discodefinitions at the whim of @abarker or other curators.

Note that none of the links actually seem to work post-migration, so just search within this thread to find it, until someone updates this

abarker

Discopædia
noun
A dictionary of Discourse related terms.

See: Discopædia, Discopædia

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

abarker

Dicsourse
noun
An official, unofficial alternate name for Discourse.

Alternate spellings:
Dicsores, Dicksores, DickSores
Use of these alternate spellings generally indicates a greater level of frustration from the poster.

Synonyms: Discosauce, Discurse, Dickcorpse

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

RaceProUK

Discobug
noun

A bug that won't be fixed because the user is Doing It Wrong™
A bug that won't be fixed because the developers don't like the people who discovered the bug.

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

Arantor

Discodev
noun
A person that creates and maintains code for Discourse but would never be classified by any sane developer as 'a developer'.

The title may also be given in honour to non-Discourse code authors if they share the same level of expertise and attitude.

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

VinDuv

DiscoTime
noun

Set of time units used on Discourse. In some cases, this is a result of Discorounding. In other cases, it is the result of a supposedly sliding window that actually has a hard reset (e.g., likes rate limiting). In every case, it is the result of Discologic. Do not expect Discotime to match real time.
Time measured relative to when Discourse was inflicted on this forum. Usage: a long discotime ago.
The time which Discourse takes to apply an edit. Whether an update to the forum, editing a post, or even saving an initial post, all are discotime. Example: I was stuck in Discotime while Dicsourse saved my post.

See Also: Discoday, Discohour, Discominute, Discosecond

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

abarker

Discoursistency
adjective
A state of consistent inconsistency.

Synonyms: Discoursistency
Antonyms: Discoursistency

Thanks to @Accalia for identifying the synonyms and antonyms.

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

abarker

Discologic
noun

A peculiar kind of logic which only makes sense to a Discodev, or Jeff Attwood. But mostly Jeff. Often characterized as "Jeff Doesn't Get It", or JDGI for short.
An Illogical Logic that seems to be completely Illogical until one discovers the beautiful Logic within the Illogic, then discovers that the Logic is, in fact, BS

Thanks to @Arantor for contributing JDGI.
Thanks to @Accalia for definition 2
Thanks to @HardwareGeek for proofing @Accalia's definition

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

SignatureGuy

DiscoBot
noun
Something which doesn't exist.

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

loopback0

Discofail
noun
A failure related to an activity within Discourse, typically one which is simple and should just work as expected.

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

RaceProUK

Discophile
noun

A fan of music from the 1970s, or disco music in general
Someone who likes Discourse. See also: insanity, madness, Discourse Syndrome

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

RaceProUK

Discopink
noun
Purple

@blakeyrat knows what I'm on about :)

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

mott555

Discourserability (may have alternate spellings)
adjective
Description of commonly-used features and tasks that are very difficult to locate unless you are a DiscoDev.

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

abarker

Discourse Syndrome
noun

A mental illness, similar to Stockholm Syndrome. Symptoms include:

Original dislike to outright hate of Discourse.
Gradual change to acceptance
Acceptance later replaced by actually liking Discourse.

At present, all cases of Discourse Syndrome have been associated with actual users of Discourse. It is feared that cases could occur with other WTF software.

See also: Discophile

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

accalia

Discurse
noun

Pejorative used to refer to Discourse when encountering Discofail or Discoursistency

See Also:
Dickcorpse from @arantor
Dicsourse from @abarker

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

Arantor

Dickcorpse
noun
Another variant spelling for Discourse, used in the pejorative sense. Related to discurse and dicsource but with a deeper level of frustration.

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

mott555

DiscoQuote
noun
A fundamentally broken feature due to the DiscoDevs' belief that quoting other users is unconditionally Doing It Wrong™, however this feature sees widespread use in the Real World. Hilarity ensues because the bugs-to-posts ratio involving DiscoQuotes is much greater than 1.

See DiscoBug.

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

abarker

Discosearch
verb
A non-standard form of searching which is less effective than traditional searching.

noun
The Discourse implementation of searching which sometimes hijacks the native browser search feature based on some Discologic known only to Discodevs. This implementation also performs Discosearching.

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

loopback0

Discoround
verb
A non-standard form of rounding numbers which is less accurate and more Discoursistent than traditional rounding

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

abarker

Discoday
noun

A unit of time that may range from less than one real minute to more than one real day. The actual upper limit has not yet been accurately mapped. When counting down, a Discoday will often, though not always, end at midnight UTC, even when Discourse advises otherwise.

See Also: Discotime

Thanks to @Arantor for remembering the bit about midnight UTC.

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

abarker

Discohour
noun

A unit of time that may range from less than one hour to more than an hour. It seems that a disco hour may be as little as 20 real minutes, or as much as 100 real minutes. Due to Discologic and Discoursitency, this relationship is subject to change without notice.

See Also: Discotime

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

abarker

Discominute
noun

A unit of time that may range from a few real seconds to several real minutes. No precise relationship has been determined.

See Also: Discotime

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

chubertdev

WONT_FIX
noun

A Discourse bug.

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

abarker

Discodrama
noun

The strained relationship between the official Discodevs and members of what.thedailywtf.com. Seen in the early days of what.thedailywtf.com, but still alive on meta.discourse.org.

UPDATED (11 Sep 2015): Discodrama culminated in DiscoGate.

Thanks to @Hardwaregeek for this new term!

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

Polygeekery

The Lounge
noun

An exclusionary zone that due to Discologic is meant to bring everyone together. Named after Frequent Flyer lounges that are frequented by alcoholic pilots and airport hookers and usually only visited on long layovers when you are already pissed.

See also: An area that @blakeyrat does not have access to because he is opposed to gamification, despite spending nearly every waking hour playing video games.

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

abarker

The Church of the Civilized Discourse Construction Kit
noun

Abbreviation: TCotCDCK

Group to which Discophiles, Discodevs, and those who suffer from Discourse Syndrome belong. Those truly committed to Discourse will try to convince others that Discourse is the one true forum software, and will likely refer to Jeff Attwood as a prophet. Those who associate with TCotCDCK will gloss over Jeff's inability to follow his own words by stating that he can do no wrong. When asked if we must follow Jeff's words or his actions, a TCotCDCK zealot will tell you that Jeff's words will lead you to happiness.

Avoid at all costs.

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

delfinom

Bug
noun

Feature imagined by his holy greatness Jeff.

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

loopback0

Discosauce
noun

Whatever Jeff is on when he thinks of his feature changes for Discourse.

[Citation]

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

abarker

Bug Blindness
noun
A state of being so overwhelmed by Discobugs, that you begin to not even notice them anymore. This condition may be a precursor to Discourse Syndrome.

If you suspect you may be experiencing Bug Blindness, please seek help immediately. There is still hope.

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

chubertdev

Bug-finding
verb

Posting a comment.

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

Polygeekery

Bug Reports
noun

Unpaid work done to improve software that is open-source in name only. Basically slave labor to help line Jeff Atwood's pockets as it improves his software. Most bug reports will be closed as WONTFIX or ASDESIGNED, or just deleted without comment. Filing too many bug reports may get you banned from meta.d. Too many bug reports will be seen as complaining, even though the software is shit.

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

Polygeekery

Pagination
unknown

No definition found in the Discopædia. You must be Doing It Wrong™.

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

Polygeekery

Scroll Bar
noun

Useless graphic on the right of browser windows that has no meaningful connection to anything whatsoever. Just a random graphic that changes size and position as you navigate through Infiniscroll wonderfulness. Forget everything you have ever known about its function.

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

abarker

Android®
noun

Some worthless, piece of shit, mobile OS invented by Google solely to make things harder for the Discodevs. What's that? You say Discourse works fine on your Android device? Shut up. You're obviously Doing It Wrong™. Or lying. Even Jeff's old Nexus 7 agrees with me.

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

Polygeekery

Meta.d
noun, website

Shortened colloquial form of meta.discourse.org that is the definitive source for gamification and social engineering re: forum software. Also, the perfect iteration of bug tracking software. It is where you go if you want to see how Web 42.0 is going to be. So far ahead of its time that mere mortals will have difficulty understanding what they are on about.

"Abandon all hope ye who enter here"

Related definitions in normal dictionaries: taking the piss, self-reinforcing motivation, echo chamber, fool's errand, etc.

Synonym: meta.derp

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

Polygeekery

Toaster
noun

Pop-up social engineering dialogs that show you how to Do It Right or shame you when you are Doing It Wrong. Specifically engineered to prevent topics like this where one user might foolishly attempt to make several distinct posts instead of lumping everything in to one post. They also try to prevent user participation when someone has a lot to say on a topic by making them feel like they are talking too much.

Term was originally coined by @blakeyrat, who to this day insists he did not come up with it and that it is a "stupid fucking term" that someone like him would never use.

Citation here.

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

abarker

Heatmap
noun

Color coding intended to convey additional information about a list of items. Supposedly, items which have a Heatmap applied progress from a neutral color to red, to a dark orange, and finally to a bright orange. The Heatmap is supposed to draw your attention by indicating and increase in ... something which is generally not immediately visible. It's supposed to to be good. Also, Heatmaps are, according to the Discodevs, obvious.

See Also: Coldmap

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

chubertdev

™
adjective

That was Jeff's idea, not yours.

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

Kuro

what.thedailywtf.com
noun, website, Discourse-forum
abbr: WTDWTF

A place where Bugs are discovered, tears are being had and blakeyrat is going rampant!
Also a place nobody on meta.d is allowed to link to.

As of 11 October 2015, WTDWTF is no longer recognized by the DiscoDevs as an official Discourse install.

See also:
http://what.thedailywtf.com

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

abarker

Coldmap
noun

Color coding intended to convey additional information about a list of items. Supposedly, items which have a Coldmap applied progress from a neutral color to a dark blue, to a paler blue, and finally to a really pale blue. The Coldmap is supposed to draw your attention in a KEEP AWAY fashion by indicating a decrease in ... something which is generally not immediately visible. It's supposed to to be bad. Also, Coldmaps are, according to the Discodevs, obvious.

See Also: Heatmap

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

abarker

Ⓡ
adjective

As with ™, Ⓡ indicates an idea that was Jeff's and not yours. However, Jeff started to register that idea, and then forgot about it. As a result, the registration is invalid, and Jeff's use of Ⓡ may constitute fraud. It could also invalidate his claim to the idea.

Please consult @apapadimoulis,Esq, MD, FACS, MBA, eMBA before using an idea marked with ® as your own.

Discopædia WTDWTF on Twitter

Polygeekery

@blakeyrat
asshole, rageaholic

Frequent poster to what.tdwtf. Known for his frequent fits of rage referred to as "blakeyrants" where he drones on and on and on about topics such as, but not limited to: how the Mac Classic was the greatest piece of computing hardware to ever be conceived, how games he does not like are shit, how open source software is complete shit and always will be, how he hates Like buttons, how C# is the greatest computer language ever conceived of by man (this view is somehow not incompatible with his view on the Mac Classic), why anyone who uses PHP is a fucking moron, HyperCard was the right way to program even though the rest of the world thought it was slow and retarded, etc. Most blakeyrants tend to be about how his personal worldviews should be canon. Very prone to rage quits. Long overdue for a rage quit. Always returns after a rage quit without even acknowledging that he has been gone and that his quitting made him look like a complete bellend.

loopback0

Zero
Number

Almost always the amount of days since last bug in Discourse.

📖 Teh Oﬃcial Discopædia (Forums Dictionary)

0 - C

D - Discob

Discoc - Discoe

Discof - Discol

Discom - Discoq

Discor - Discot

Discou - Discov

Discow - F

G - I

J

K - S

T - V

W

Y - 0