Just realised...

  • Over the years I must have receive hundreds of emails about new starters that end with "Please join me in welcoming so-and-so to the company" and I have never once joined in and welcomed them.

    I feel a bit bad now.

  • In my experience, it's usually a ruse because Ben Genderson, the new starter, is actually the new head of the Hiring and Firing Department, and the welcome party is to allow Ben to see which employees aren't contributing to the company.

    You're not missing much though. A few people will almost get fired, but then there will be a bomb scare and everyone will forget about it.

  • kills Dumbledore

    My company is just getting past the size where it's feasible to go round the office and introduce them to everybody. Not that I ever remembered their names when that happened anyway

  • New hires get dropped off at my desk and have to spend at least two weeks in my company before moving on to their final destination. I'll introduce our software, branch and customers so that they actually have a clue about what we do, who our customers are and how the little tiny software wheel they end up working on fits in the big IT machinery that keeps the customers running and helps them actually do something.
    Most of the time the HR administration already had a walk around to show them around the building but after a few days I'll repeat it because then the departments are only starting to make sense and people have a higher chance of not getting lost in the similar looking floors.

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