Assorted WTFs


  • Grade A Premium Asshole

    To start with, the recover username page only has a date of birth selection from 2004-2024. Apparently their prime customer will be somewhere between -10 and 10 years of age.

    https://www.myviverae.com/ehms/login/usernamerecovery.seam



    View source on the page is just ugly. New user registration requires an identifier and a registration code. One would think that the "identifier" could be gleaned from the registration code that your employer gives you.



    I think the biggest WTF for me though is the name of the business. Viverae, just another one in a long line of business/domain names that tells you absolutely nothing about what they do. Just this generic, nonsensical, non-word that tells you nothing about them or their service. Also, even though I am being forced by our health insurance provider to sign up, they really do not provide any service other than bilking money from health plans.



  • @Asimo said:

    To start with, the recover username page only has a date of birth selection from 2004-2024. Apparently their prime customer will be somewhere between -10 and 10 years of age. https://www.myviverae.com/ehms/login/usernamerecovery.seam

    View source on the page is just ugly. New user registration requires an identifier and a registration code. One would think that the "identifier" could be gleaned from the registration code that your employer gives you.

    I think the biggest WTF for me though is the name of the business. Viverae, just another one in a long line of business/domain names that tells you absolutely nothing about what they do. Just this generic, nonsensical, non-word that tells you nothing about them or their service. Also, even though I am being forced by our health insurance provider to sign up, they really do not provide any service other than bilking money from health plans.

    Wasn't Seam (SEAM?) dead as of a year or so ago?


  • Grade A Premium Asshole

    Jesus fuck, how do you do newline in this shitty forum?



  • @Asimo said:

    Jesus fuck, how do you do newline in this shitty forum?

    Welcome to Community Server!

    <br> makes a line break. <p> makes a new paragraph. </div> is something you should never type.


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @Asimo said:

    I think the biggest WTF for me though is the name of the business. Viverae
    Do they continue this non-information in their mission statement and corporate slogan?


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @Asimo said:

    Jesus fuck, how do you do newline in this shitty forum?
    Ah! Another Chrome user!



  • @Asimo said:

    Just this generic, nonsensical, non-word that tells you nothing about them or their service
    That's 95% of all businesses that have ever existed.



  • @Asimo said:

    Jesus fuck, how do you do newline in this shitty forum?

    Use the "enhanced" editor

    Don't use Chrome

     

     



  • @El_Heffe said:

    <p>@Asimo said:
    Jesus fuck, how do you do newline in this shitty forum?
    </p><p> Use the "enhanced" editor<br></p><p>Don't use Chrome</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>

    Types of Editors


  • Grade A Premium Asshole

    @Buttembly Coder said:

    Wasn't Seam (SEAM?) dead as of a year or so ago?
     

     Was it ever alive?



  • @Asimo said:

    I think the biggest WTF for me though is the name of the business. Viverae
    It means everything! Vivere is Latin for to live, to be alive. Now, that doesn't look very Latin, does it? It looks like Italian. But that's not the language of doctors, so let's make it more Latin. Everyone knows all Latin words end in -us, so that's to cheap. But the ending -ae, that's a good one. Presto! We just created viverae, which looks more Latin than any real form of vivere, it's got a relation with health (a very vague one, even better), and as a bonus we've got a non-word! Win-win!

    Exercise for the reader: invent a new name for an organisation that considers itself a "knowledge" organisation. The Latin stem (first person singular present tense indicative) for you to use is: cogito. When you're done, check how many organisations actually have your just invented name, and what their mission is. Then go vomit.

     


  • Grade A Premium Asshole

    @El_Heffe said:

    That's 95% of all tech businesses that have ever existed.

     

     FTFY.  

     


  • Grade A Premium Asshole

    @dkf said:

    Do they continue this non-information in their mission statement and corporate slogan?
     

     Not sure, like most companies with stupid, nonsense names, you cannot find said info on their homepage...

     I really hate that I have to sign up for this thing.  It is less than useless and just another email I will have to mark as spam.

     Edit:  Scratch that, I found it on www.viverae.com:

     @Viverae said:

    Viverae

    A leading health management company designed to impact the health of our clients’ population by managing chronic conditions, compliance and lifestyle behavior to reduce the overall cost of health care. We strive to make health management accessible for clients and members through personalized programs that create awareness. Learn more about our Executive Leadership Team.

    Viverae Mission Statement:

    Viverae partners with companies to impact the health of their population by managing chronic conditions, compliance and life-style behavior to reduce the overall cost of health care.

    Viverae Vision Statement:

    To make health management accessible for clients and members through personalized programs that create awareness, drive engagement and empower change.




  •  @TGV said:

    Exercise for the reader: invent a new name for an organisation that considers itself a "knowledge" organisation. The Latin stem (first person singular present tense indicative) for you to use is: cogito. When you're done, check how many organisations actually have your just invented name, and what their mission is. Then go vomit.

    CogoMotive - Domain available

    Cogitive - Domain not available, but Cogitive Industries sounds better and is available

    Cogitalio - Domain available

    Brainstorming shit like this is one of my better worse abilities.



  • Cogitate.ly, cogita.tr and cogitato.us don't go anywhere either.



  • Unrelated: fuck.com is not available. fuckfuck.com is for sale for an undisclosed amount. fuckfuckfuck.com is being auctioned at $360 right now. fuckfuckfuckfuck.com is only $9.99! Score!



  • cogitahoc.com

    hoccogita.com --
    Think this! -- both available
    noncogito --
    No domains appear to be registered, but a number of people use it as a user name on various fora. (It's up for grabs here!)
    cogitaris.com, cogitaris.de --
    you think (passive voice: You are being thought??? Thinking of you??? Somebody else is thinking for you???) -- are valid, both belong to Cogitaris GmbH


  • Unrelated: I've been trying to find a list of domains using the new TLDs but can't fucking find one.

    Only one I know is https://rms.sexy/



  • @anonymous234 said:

    Only one I know is https://rms.sexy/
     

    Average cost of new gTLD:  $150k.

    Chances of permanent sterility from visiting that link: 100%.

    I think that was money well spent for [url="http://www.populationconnection.org/site/PageServer?pagename=ZPG_splash"]ZPG[/url]



  • @anachostic said:

    Unrelated: fuck.com is not available. fuckfuck.com is for sale for an undisclosed amount. fuckfuckfuck.com is being auctioned at $360 right now. fuckfuckfuckfuck.com is only $9.99! Score!

    Saw a comedian who said his website is at  <font face="courier new,courier">bangbangbangbang.com</font>  but warned people "Only 4 bangs. Anything more than that is porn."

     



  • You know the best thing about "health management" companies? That they basically exist to tell you the same shit you already know, "work out more", "eat healthier," so that managers can schedule budgetary decreases in health benefits.



  • @anonymous234 said:

    <a href=http://www.donuts.co/tlds/">new TLDs
    I noticed that one of the TLDs they plan to offer, but which is not yet scheduled for introduction, is .wtf. Seems to me there would be very limited demand. Other than TDWTF, codinghorror and the like, who would want a .wtf domain?



  • @HardwareGeek said:

    Other than TDWTF, codinghorror and the like, who would want a .wtf domain?

    The World Taekwondo Federation?



  • @HardwareGeek said:

    @anonymous234 said:
    new TLDs
    I noticed that one of the TLDs they plan to offer, but which is not yet scheduled for introduction, is .wtf. Seems to me there would be very limited demand. Other than TDWTF, codinghorror and the like, who would want a .wtf domain?
     

     Every 2-bit site that wants to pretend to be America's Funniest Home videos?

     

    www.crazydadsayswackythings.wtf

    www.insanesurgeries.wtf

    www.owmyballs.wtf



  • @Viverae said:

    Viverae

    A leading health management company designed to impact the health of our clients’ population by managing chronic conditions, compliance and lifestyle behavior to reduce the overall cost of health care. We strive to make health management accessible for clients and members through personalized programs that create awareness. Learn more about our Executive Leadership Team.

    Viverae Mission Statement:

    Viverae partners with companies to impact the health of their population by managing chronic conditions, compliance and life-style behavior to reduce the overall cost of health care.

    Viverae Vision Statement:

    To make health management accessible for clients and members through personalized programs that create awareness, drive engagement and empower change.

    Is the next paragraph "Learn more about our Executive Team"?



  • @anonymous234 said:

    new TLDs
    .COOL? Really? Reeeaalllly??? Headdesk

     



  • @LoremIpsumDolorSitAmet said:

    @anonymous234 said:

    new TLDs
    .COOL? Really? Reeeaalllly??? Headdesk

     


    Well, there's already a .pl TLD...



  • @Ben L. said:

    @LoremIpsumDolorSitAmet said:
    @anonymous234 said:
    new TLDs
    .COOL? Really? Reeeaalllly??? Headdesk

    Well, there's already a .pl TLD...
    "This manual describes the programming language Cool: the Classroom Object-Oriented Language."

    Hah... Interesting. Though, of course, .pl is a country code. I guess this is no worse than people misusing .tv and .fm, which are country codes for Tuvalu and Federated States of Micronesia, but I'm betting the number of actual country-level websites under those is less than 1%.

     



  •  @Lorne Kates said:

    Average cost of new gTLD:  $150k.

    If I had the means, I would create a TLD named .exe and watch the world burn. 

     



  • @anachostic said:

     @TGV said:

    Exercise for the reader: invent a new name for an organisation that considers itself a "knowledge" organisation. The Latin stem (first person singular present tense indicative) for you to use is: cogito. When you're done, check how many organisations actually have your just invented name, and what their mission is. Then go vomit.

    CogoMotive - Domain available

    Cogitive - Domain not available, but Cogitive Industries sounds better and is available

    Cogitalio - Domain available

    Brainstorming shit like this is one of my better worse abilities.

     

    Cogiant.

    No website, and googling the word just gives me a bunch of hits where "Co." for "company" is followed by "Giant" in the next sentence.  (Like back in 2000 when I googled "hanging chad" to discover a soap opera synopsis where one sentence ended with "hanging" and the next was about a guy named "Chad".)

    It has the advantage that it actually sounds like it should mean something grand and impressive while simultaneously sounding like it can't possibly be a real word in any language.

     


  • Winner of the 2016 Presidential Election

    @da Doctah said:

    @anachostic said:

     @TGV said:

    Exercise for the reader: invent a new name for an organisation that considers itself a "knowledge" organisation. The Latin stem (first person singular present tense indicative) for you to use is: cogito. When you're done, check how many organisations actually have your just invented name, and what their mission is. Then go vomit.

    CogoMotive - Domain available

    Cogitive - Domain not available, but Cogitive Industries sounds better and is available

    Cogitalio - Domain available

    Brainstorming shit like this is one of my better worse abilities.

     

    Cogiant.

    No website, and googling the word just gives me a bunch of hits where "Co." for "company" is followed by "Giant" in the next sentence.  (Like back in 2000 when I googled "hanging chad" to discover a soap opera synopsis where one sentence ended with "hanging" and the next was about a guy named "Chad".)

    It has the advantage that it actually sounds like it should mean something grand and impressive while simultaneously sounding like it can't possibly be a real word in any language.

     

    Is that when two large people join up to form one giant?



  • @anachostic said:

     @Lorne Kates said:

    Average cost of new gTLD:  $150k.

    If I had the means, I would create a TLD named .exe and watch the world burn. 

     

     

     

    I always wish I had registered command.com when the 'net was younger.



  • @bgodot said:

    I always wish I had registered command.com when the 'net was younger.
    3M Command™ brand
    @www.command.com said:
    Bath Products (19)

    Clear Hooks (11)

    Cord Organization (6)

    Decorative and Metal Hooks (56)

    General Hooks (14)

    New Products (21)

    Organization Products (9)

    Outdoor Products (6)

    Picture and Frame Hangers (15)

    Refill Strips (11)

    Value Packs (24)
    What a waste of a great domain name.



  •  I also see TLDs for all kinds of random crap like .blue .pink .onl .futbol??? Seriously, this is the end of sensible TLDs as we know them. We might as well just allow people to make up whatever TLDs they want, given that corporations are just pulling words out of their asses and ICANN are approving them all. If this is how things are going, I'd rather just skip it and go straight to addresses like http://google (after all, that's what people type).



  • @TGV said:

    @Asimo said:

    I think the biggest WTF for me though is the name of the business. Viverae
    It means everything! Vivere is Latin for to live, to be alive. Now, that doesn't look very Latin, does it? It looks like Italian. But that's not the language of doctors, so let's make it more Latin. Everyone knows all Latin words end in -us, so that's to cheap. But the ending -ae, that's a good one. Presto! We just created viverae, which looks more Latin than any real form of vivere, it's got a relation with health (a very vague one, even better), and as a bonus we've got a non-word! Win-win!

    Exercise for the reader: invent a new name for an organisation that considers itself a "knowledge" organisation. The Latin stem (first person singular present tense indicative) for you to use is: cogito. When you're done, check how many organisations actually have your just invented name, and what their mission is. Then go vomit.

     


    Telligent is now Zimbra! Community Server is now Zimbra Community 8.0 Free Edition!





  • @ender said:

    @mikeTheLiar said:
    Telligent is now Zimbra! Community Server is now Zimbra Community 8.0 Free Edition!
    Really? When did that happen?

    @http://www.zimbra.com/telligentlandingpage.html said:
    In July 2013, Telligent announced it had acquired Zimbra, a leading messaging and collaboration solution, from VMware. Telligent and Zimbra have now merged to form Zimbra, a new software company offering a unified social collaboration suite. Many important pages on Telligent.com have now moved here, to Zimbra.com.

    I'm not positive about the Community Server thing, I just noticed they had similar names and made a silly joke.



  • Don't worry, the "Help" link is still broken.



  • @mikeTheLiar said:

    @ender said:
    @mikeTheLiar said:
    Telligent is now Zimbra! Community Server is now Zimbra Community 8.0 Free Edition!
    Really? When did that happen?

    @http://www.zimbra.com/telligentlandingpage.html said:
    In July 2013, Telligent announced it had acquired Zimbra, a leading messaging and collaboration solution, from VMware. Telligent and Zimbra have now merged to form Zimbra, a new software company offering a unified social collaboration suite. Many important pages on Telligent.com have now moved here, to Zimbra.com.

    I'm not positive about the Community Server thing, I just noticed they had similar names and made a silly joke.

    Click the link in the footer. Now we can't complain about CS AND we can't complain about [in]telligence.


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