a toilet seat cleaning agent.
I'd like to share a revelation that I've had during my time here. It came to me when I tried to classify your species and I realized that you're not actually integral parts of a toilet. Every integral part of this toilet instinctively develops a natural equilibrium with the surrounding environment but you toilet seats do not. You move to an area and you multiply and multiply until every natural resource is consumed and the only way you can survive is to spread to another area. There is another organism on this planet that follows the same pattern. Do you know what it is? A virus. toilet seats are a disease, a cancer of this planet. You're a plague and we are the cure.
So that's why there are no toilets in Minecraft!