"Jump, Apple". "How high, ancarda?"
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I'm likely Apple's most annoying customer as I'm always sending them "product suggestions", as if any of Apple's customers have actual complaints -- Their stuff is always perfect! Well I saw through the reality distortion field and the contact form isn't just for show, as I soon found out. Still, it's well polished turds so I continue to buy their stuff.
A trend I started to notice a few years back is when I leave them feedback, I never get a response but they always quietly do as I say. Once I realized I have this control over one of the world's most wealthy companies on the planet, what do you think I did with this new found power? Get Apple to spend their fortunes on world hunger, disease or poverty? Of course not. What do you think I am, some nice, responsible person?
Well first, I needed to test the system was truly listening to me and only me. I had to ask them a question only I would. It had to fulfill absolutely zero business need and it had to be unique as the latency between request and the silent command obeyed confirmation could be years.
Consider the venn diagram of people who speak Lojban and people who can touch an Apple product without bursting into flames. The diagram has a single person; me. Ladies and gentlemen.
mfw when I got them to add Lojban to iOS and OS X.
https://i.imgur.com/ov2M80f.png
https://i.imgur.com/zTudO4X.png
You're welcome.
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you are trwtf at times <3
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Ben L instantly becomes Apple's best customer.
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@ben_lubar would never touch a Mac. For one thing, I just tried running Dwarf Fortress on mine and it seemed to get very confused as
dwarfort.exe"opened" and had to be killed via Activity Monitor.
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Yeah. It's not even the Windows binary that is run by mistake:
$ file dwarfort.exe dwarfort.exe: Mach-O executable i386
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le mi varkiclaflo'i cu culno lo angila
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Figured more people should be aware of this great power and promoted via the main TDWTF for great justice.
Somebody set us up the Lojban!!
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Far too obvious, the system will become aware that I have admin access.
Maybe just a little hovercraft...
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Dude, I've told you, we're not building SkyNet!!
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probably not. word for "eels" is giving me trouble. XD
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That pesky Hungarian phrase book again.
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Why build SkyNet when we already have it? I'm working on getting admin access for Google, you just watch me. This journey started with an iPhone. I just need to pickup a Nexus...
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my lojban skills failed me when I had to look up matches and somehow didnt notice it wasnt a verb.
err_la_lojban_not_found
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psst
Nobody reads the manual or even files called "README". Every application should just work and be completely intuitive and discoverable by even the most dim-witted of users. If the user does something wrong, the application should helpfully correct their action and endeavour to provide the correct output, even when given the wrong input.
Yes, this even applies to Dwarf Fortress. Ideally the game should install itself, start up automatically, and then spend the next three months losing game after game before finally filling every single tile of the world with seven layers of magma.
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Woah, so there are now two Lojban speakers in this forum? That thing really is gaining traction!
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Me and Ben had quite a nice chat yesterday:
https://what.thedailywtf.com/t/dorf-dorf-dorf-dorf-dorf-little-person-dorf-dorf/53177/239
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It could be more!
https://what.thedailywtf.com/t/the-status-ideas-thread/1673/39568
hrrm, one box isn't showing the important image there.
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What if like 3 people make 33 accounts each and send an email and Ben sends the 100th (because that would be him with his username, counter to Blakey's clause), would that count?
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by @Magus in the status thread
https://what.thedailywtf.com/t/the-status-ideas-thread/1673/39569But yes, I'm trying to get someone to help @ben_lubar out with this plan as I think it would be funny.
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I was trying to counter the edge cases ;)
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We could easily automate this process; sign up for a random email address, show the CAPTCHA if it needs to be solved, compose an email then send. We'll hook up each step to a button then give access to a click farm in India. Sit back and watch the emails flood in.
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Why random emails? Just add sequential numbers after the plus sign:
username+100@gmail.com, job done.
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So 100 variants of @ben_lubar's gmail account? I think @blakeyrat covered that in his list of requirements.
Also, it cracks me up thinking about a click farm spamming blakeyrat until he can pronounce
xrulaproperly.
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Just add sequential numbers after the plus sign:
blakeyratShouldLearnLojban+100@gmail.com, job done.Filed Under: FTFY CTFB
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So 100 variants of anyone else's should therefore be fine!
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Have them build a competitor to Discourse. And have them crush Discourse.
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Apple Forum? I suppose that could be a component in OS X Server; they already have a Wiki component you can turn on.
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I'd send him 1 e-mail saying he shouldn't learn Lojban, but I don't know his e-mail address, don't want to know his e-mail address, don't want him to know any of my e-mail addresses, and don't want to create a throw-away e-mail address just to send it from.
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@blakeyrat what about Steam chat messages, do those count? 'Cos I'll send you one.
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I've already disqualified everybody on this site because you've been scheming and cheating and being pedantic dickweeds about what I typed when it was obvious what I meant. So it doesn't matter what you do at this point.
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I've already disqualified everybody on this site because you've been scheming and cheating and being pedantic dickweeds about what I typed when it was obvious what I meant. So it doesn't matter what you do at this point.
What, I wasn't involved in the idea of spamming you with fake accounts, and it's not as if you haven't already friended me on Steam, so you'd know it's me.
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hrrm, one box isn't showing the important image there.
https://what.thedailywtf.com/uploads/default/original/3X/7/4/74f03ab659a70620035f5857083a71816d1e6a7f.pngGreat, now we're going to have 50+ replies of
about how the font in that chat window can't be adjusted!
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I'm more concerned that he's using a deprecated avatar on there.
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You realise that we were doing it for comedy effect and that none of us missed the point if what you were saying, right?
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Get your logic out of here!
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Did you write that after realizing there's now a team of crazy Lojbanists who have nothing better to do than spend days on end getting you to join our ranks?
One of us. One of us. One of us.
.i ko tavla fo la lojban
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Dude, I've told you, we're not building SkyNet!!
As long as you build it in PHP, I don't care.
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You want the world to be taken over by AI built in the (officially TDWTF voted) second worst language EVAR???
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No, I want people building something that will take the world over to waste their time trying to do it in PHP.
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crazy Lojbanists who have nothing better to do
I don't know if I've ever seen a more redundant phrase.
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@Blakeyrat: you should totally learn Lojban.
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@Blakeyrat: you should totally learn Lojban.
If @Blakeyrat learns lojban then @accalia will learn lojban too.
so....... yeah. there's that.
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@ben_lubar: you should totally build a GUI that makes lojban usable without needing to learn it first.
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Do I realize that? Yes.
Does it change my mind? No.
