The Official Status Thread

Last Xmas my wife asked for the Samsung smart watch. She wore it for less than a month and stopped using it. I wore it for a couple of weeks and then stopped. Both of us found it essentially useless.

I have a GARMIN braclet that serves as an expensive alarm clock now.

@FrostCat said:

What if it was someone you work with who could've taken you to the loo?

My boss came back at about half one and I finally got to use the loo. Just in case you're looking for closure.... :( :( :( :(

loopback0

@accalia said:

/me wanders over to check USPS international rates for live cargo

I'm not sure @Lorne_Kates meant live cargo.

loopback0

@DogsB said:

My boss came back at about half one and I finally got to use the loo.

I'd have just taken my coat, wallet and car keys then when I couldn't get back in, gone out for lunch and come back when people were likely to be back.

RaceProUK

Status: Spent days (on and off) trying to track why an automated FTP wasn't working; turned out it was because I derped and forgot to put the ftp:// at the start of the address.

Weng

I have a friend who still wears and swears by an original pebble. Basically, "because I can leave my phone to lay around and still have access to the important parts".

His phone is an LG G4 with an extended zero lemon battery. So roughly the size, shape and weight of a brick.

Rhywden

@Weng said:

His phone is an LG G4 with an extended zero lemon battery. So roughly the size, shape and weight of a brick.

Taking the "mobile" out of mobile, eh?

Weng

Yeah.

Tsaukpaetra

Status: Primary proxy server for this area of the office is down. Internal resources still work, so I hooked into the proxy server in Minnesota and now I'm the only one on my team with Internet.
Surprisingly, the proxy server way over there is slightly more lenient (regarding simultaneous connections) than this one....

Jaloopa

@Polygeekery said:

Last Xmas my wife asked for the Samsung smart watch. She wore it for less than a month and stopped using it. I wore it for a couple of weeks and then stopped. Both of us found it essentially useless.

Someone at work had the Motorola round one and was letting people try it out for a week, in return for any thoughts on whether it would be useful for our clients. [spoiler]it wouldn't be[/spoiler]

The only useful feature I found was an app that would vibrate and alert me if I left my phone behind. I could also read text messages on my wrist a couple of lines at a time, in a manner that reminded me of mid 90s phones.

I now have a rather nice clockwork watch which has all the clockwork on display. I can watch the cogs working to destress. It's nice

Tsaukpaetra

@Jaloopa said:

I could also read text messages on my wrist a couple of lines at a time, in a manner that reminded me of mid 90s phones.

Did that, not fun. Especially since using the embedded stylus meant literal pin-point accuracy of less than 2 mm was required...
Somehow I still texted better English than anyone I was communicating with at the time.

Filed under: That was after my phone that had T9 that I could text with from my pocket with 92% accuracy...

sloosecannon

@Jaloopa said:

Motorola round one

Moto 360. I've got one.

I've found it pretty useful personally, but it is still probably a bit expensive....

sloosecannon

I can get 2fa codes on it though - that's amazingly useful

Jaloopa

I can see smartwatches being useful for women who keep their phone in a bag and never hear it ring. Of course the marketing problem is that its main use is to stop you looking at your phone as much. That's not an easy sell, especially when you also want to sell the new iPhone n++S

RaceProUK

@Jaloopa said:

I can see smartwatches being useful for women who keep their phone in a bag and never hear it ring.

Personally, I'm thinking it'd be good for me to see if the reason my phone dinged is worth getting my phone out for or not.

*keeps her phone in her pocket*

Tsaukpaetra

@Jaloopa said:

useful for ~~women~~persons who keep their phone in a bag and never hear it ring.

This, except slightly different: My dad has his phone blasting loud with a shrill whistle because despite it being on his hip (lol, hipster), he sometimes misses notifications!
Really annoying to the rest of us, we can hear it across the house (through three rooms and doors, closed).

And also for the significant other, who can't figure out how to read text messages on the lock screen (despite them being right there above the passcode box).

sloosecannon

That too. And I can keep the phone on silent without missing notifications.

NedFodder

Status: Getting sick of trying to explain things to this guy:

: The problem-
: Yeah.
: -is that we only allocated-
: M-Hmm.
: -eight bits-
: Yup.
: -for this field-
: Uh-huh.
: -because we didn't know at the time-
: Right.
: -how many-
: Yuh-huh.
:
: M-Hmm.
: ಠ_ಠ
: Right.
: There's no way you're actually listening to me.
: M-Hmm.

Lorne Kates

@blakeyrat said:

Pack your laptop, go to the bathroom, then go home and work from there. I solve all problems

Take a poop in your desk drawer
Jam open your office door with a brick and/or a co-worker's severed limb
Amazon Prime some diapers to your office
Stuff enough post-its up your butt and urethra so that you don't have to go
Go anyways, then start pounding on the door afterwards shouting "SOMEONE LET ME IN I HAD TO GO PEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

I solve all the problems, too!

Lorne Kates

@loopback0 said:

I'm not sure @Lorne_Kates meant live cargo.

@accalia knows what I meant. I AM capable of being romantic. Occasionally. I need to ration it out, though. Jan 11th and I've already burned through the entire year's worth of "not asshole" rations.

Maciejasjmj

@Tsaukpaetra said:

That was after my phone that had T9 that I could text with from my pocket with 92% accuracy...

Liar, that didn't work with T9 at all. Standard ABC entry, on the other hand...

Tsaukpaetra

@Maciejasjmj said:

Liar, that didn't work with T9 at all.

You're right, I was talking about two different phones in my post. Try to keep up.

accalia

Status****strong text:

:phone: > RING RING
> Hmm? unrecognized number... -silence ringer-
:phone: > RING RING
> Hmm? same unrecognized number... -silence ringer-
:phone: > RING RING
> -sigh- this had better be good. -answer phone- This is Accalia. speak.
:phone: > -click- Hello Tanya Johnson! This is Eric from Debt-Colectors-R-Us, calling about your overdue balance on your credit card number 4111 1111 1111 1111
> uh..... what?!
:phone: > I'm calling about your overdue balance on your credit card number 4111 1111 1111 1111, expiring 01/2025
> okay.... First, Eric from Debt-Collectors-R-Us, I'm Accalia not Tanya, you have the wrong number
> second, did you really just call me, and without verifying that you are talking to the correct person give me not only the first and last name of the person you are trying to contact, but also their full credit card number with expiration date?
:phone: > uhh....
> So, at this point i think the prudent thing for you to do right now is to hang up and mark this number as invalid. I am not Tanya, I don't know anyone named Tanya, and i've had this phone number for ten years now.
> So, if i never hear from you or your company on this matter i'll forget this entire conversation happened... deal?
:phone: > -click- -carrier tone-
> That's what i thought.

Fox

Status: Turning dozens of these:

<a class="nonblock" href="files/some_file.pdf">Some File </a><a class="nonblock nontext actAsDiv clip_frame excludeFromNormalFlow" id="u580" href="files/other_file.pdf"><img id="u580_img" src="images/pdficon.jpg" alt="" height="17" width="17"></a>

into these:

<a href="files/some_file.pdf">Some File <img src="images/pdficon.jpg" alt="" height="17" width="17"></a>

Tsaukpaetra

@accalia said:

:phone: > -click- -carrier tone-

Your mobile gives you a carrier tone when the other party disconnects? Are you in a TV show or something?

I also have some Vanessa Hutchins (or something, they obviously won't spell out the name when they call) for the same thing. Though I've only had this number for six years, so there's that...
Now I have to figure out which number they're calling, as I have a round-robin forwarder setup that makes it more involved to figure out which phone was called first...

accalia

@Tsaukpaetra said:

Your mobile gives you a carrier tone when the other party disconnects?

nah, just a little artistic license for effect in the anonymization.

Weng

I wish they did. I've spent too much time talking to a dead line.

Lorne Kates

@accalia said:

Status****strong text:

My phone number belongs to a company that went bankrupt a couple years prior. At least once a week I get a message on the machine along the lines of:

"This is so-and-so from Douchbag-Mc-Eight Tier Company regarding a very important business matter. Your immediate attention is required. When you call 1-800-scumbag-fuckers, quote business number 55555"

Some variant of. Occasionally there's a robo-voice insert of the company name.

I've long since given up answering any call from a phone number I don't recognize. And I don't know what the size of that company's debt was (it was a hole-in-the-wall PC repair shop), but it's been nigh on 8 years since they went under. I know that when a debt collection agency can't collect, they sell the debt to another agency at a fraction of the cost. There has to have been at least 20-30 different agencies calling over the years. Even if the business owed something stupid like $100k, it could only be worth, what, twenty bucks now?

I revel in the fact that every one of those voice messages represents an irrecoverable and unrecoverable expense for one of the shitstains of the universe: debt collection agencies.

accalia

@Lorne_Kates said:

I've long since given up answering any call from a phone number I don't recognize.

as have i, but among my friends i've made it well known that if it's an emergency and they need to contact me from an unknown phone number to call three times in quick succession and i'll answer, rather than picking up the voicemail in a few minutes when i get to a good stopping place.

so when the third ring came through i figured it was one of my friends from a work line or something that i didn't have in my phone. <change

Lorne Kates

@Tsaukpaetra said:

Now I have to figure out which number they're calling, as I have a round-robin forwarder setup that makes it more involved to figure out which phone was called first...

One of these days I'm going to learn how to set up Astrisk or some other PBX. And I'll program it so that I can press a button, and it'll pick up. And start playing back random voice clips.

Scumfucker: "I'd like to talk to Old Dead PC owner please."
Recording (randomly selected): Uh-huh. Hang on, can you please repeat that?
Scumfucker: "I'd like to talk to Old Dead PC owner please."
Recording: Oh, you want to talk to my husband. Please wait. {muffled sounds}
Recording: 30 second silence
Recording (different voice): Hello?
Scumfucker: "I'm from Scumfucker Inc, and I'd like to talk to you about your--"
Recording (interrupt): Sorry, I have some static on the line. Please speak up.
Scumfucker: "I'm from Scumfucker Inc, and I'd---"
Recording (interrupt): Oh, that's better. I can hear you now. So what are you calling about?

etc, etc. Waste as much of their time as possible and as little of mine.

Alternatively, if I had more money, I'd outsource it to some third world call center. I'd even offer a bonus for keeping a single call tied up for certain milestones-- 10 minutes, 1 hour, etc.

Fox

Also,

It's time for another round of Count The WTF's!

@Fox said:

class="nonblock"

A class just for making the display non-blocking.
@Fox said:

id="u555-15"

Random number ID's. FOR EVERYTHING.

@Fox said:

<span

A span within a span. Because spans produce their own visual. Obviously.

@Fox said:

class="actAsInlineDiv normal_text"

A class for spans to act as div's with display:inline; with otherwise normal text formatting.

@Fox said:

<a class="nonblock nontext actAsDiv clip_frame excludeFromNormalFlow" id="u580" href="files/other_file.pdf">

This icon links to an entirely different file than the link the icon is on. Every link's icon links to the same second file. Also, this type of non-text link has its own class for display to be non-blocking, acting as a div, being excluded from the normal flow, etc.

@Fox said:

And an empty span. Just because.

DogsB

@Fox said:

Status: Turning dozens of these:

<a class="nonblock" href="files/some_file.pdf">Some File </a><a class="nonblock nontext actAsDiv clip_frame excludeFromNormalFlow" id="u580" href="files/other_file.pdf"><img id="u580_img" src="images/pdficon.jpg" alt="" height="17" width="17"></a>

into these:

<a href="files/some_file.pdf">Some File <img src="images/pdficon.jpg" alt="" height="17" width="17"></a>

I have a regex that'll fix that...

accalia

@Lorne_Kates said:

@accalia knows what I meant.

i wasn't 100% certain, actually.

still you're mostly a nice person around these parts so i chose to assume you meant live.

i'm glad i was right.

Fox

I would not even think of touching a regex for this unless the number of entries were in the triple digits.

Magus

@accalia said:

still you're mostly a nice person around these parts

wut

loopback0

@accalia said:

still you're mostly a nice person around these parts

HardwareGeek

@loopback0 said:

I'm not sure @Lorne_Kates meant live cargo.

There's another fox around here that wouldn't need be shipped live.

HardwareGeek

@Tsaukpaetra said:

the proxy server in Minnesota

It isn't frozen?

Polygeekery

Status: In my GIS discoveries this morning, among the various things I found that included naked women with fox tails (Go to the Guacamole thread if you want an explanation for that one), I ran across this:

StormFront is doing a server migration...

Please let it be to Discourse.

This will give us sooooooo many jokes. Not to mention that their 11.7M posts and 307K user accounts will kill their server if they are running Discourse and will take them offline.

Just so many reasons that I hope they are going to Discourse, not the least of which is that JeffCo will be writing software that a hate group uses.

ben_lubar

This is probably the only time I'll ever like a post with "stormfront" in it. Or a post about how someone should switch to Discourse.

Polygeekery

You and me both @ben_lubar.

Luhmann

@Tsaukpaetra said:

Primary proxy server

Misread that as foxy server ... Didn't make sense

Magus

Status: I was going to write something about the thing I'm doing, but there's a conversation going on nearby and I forgot it. But we got NCrunch finally! Hooray!

Polygeekery

@Luhmann said:

Misread that as foxy server

Don't make me do more GIS. I have already ended up on StormFront today and spent far too long combing through cosplay pictures.

Eldelshell

@Fox said:

actAsDiv clip_frame excludeFromNormalFlow

For fuck's sake, I would kill whoever wrote that stupid shit. Why is it so hard to keep the same style rules of a programming language on CSS?

HardwareGeek

@NedFodder said:

: There's no way you're actually listening to me.
: M-Hmm.

Reminds me of my ex-wife and I. Followed by
What did I just say?
Repeats last statement almost verbatim.

I could do that even though none of the actual content of the last statement had penetrated my conscious thought.

Rhywden

Wasn't there already some type of old-man bot which does exactly that?