The Official Status Thread
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Seriously? You think that brilliant plan has even a slight chance of working?
Also, I don't actually do that, Drax, because I don't want to waste my time. Perhaps you're new here and don't recognize hyperbole from long-time members, though.
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All the long-time members are gone because Discourse drove them away. Fuck you, don't remind me of that.
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All the long-time members are gone because Discourse drove them away.
And yet you are still here.
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But... You have to use Sql Developer...
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The first suggestion from them was email which isn't practical so I've gone back with a suggestion of what I'd like to use this time. I'll just have to see what the response is.
SD cards and a pickup truck.
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It's your phone, you pay for it for your convenience, you can do what you want with it.
What about my company phone, which I don't pay for, don't really need, and have maybe got two actualy relevant incoming business calls in the 2+ years I've been working.
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Status: Printer, why did you feel the need to stop twice for cleaning in the middle of my 15 page print job?
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Self-preservation.
What did you send to the poor printer?
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Self-preservation.
What did you send to the poor printer?
a BRD for a project that i'm about to start and that is so poorly written that it's going to be about 30% red ink by weight in an hour or so....
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Unfortunately the data is quotes for jobs. Think of something similar to architectural CAD drawings.
Ugh. Time to actually get them on a call and ask them what they want to do. Maybe even do a screenshare and show them a few bits of it to let them see that you're not BSing them and really have got the files to transfer. But get them to figure out their own stupid policies far enough to give you something workable.
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Just goes to show that the printer is smarter than your average bear, then.
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Smarter than the BA who wrote this BRD for sure.
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Smarter than the BA who wrote this BRD for sure.
That's not setting the bar very high.
I've got inanimate objects on my desk smarter than the average BA.
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I've got inanimate objects on my desk smarter than the average BA.
I've scraped smarter chewing gum off my shoe.
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If you're not interested in the call, hang up. They're on the job. You're not insulting anybody or "being mean" by freeing up their time to make another call. It's your phone, you pay for it for your convenience, you can do what you want with it.
The only ones I keep on the phone (when I'm in the mood) are the fraudsters who say they're calling from Microsoft. I don't even hear most telemarketers, because I hang up if the person doesn't respond in the first second or two, and it seems like it usually takes longer than that for their dialer to connect them to me.
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I don't even hear most telemarketers, because I hang up if the person doesn't respond in the first second or two, and it seems like it usually takes longer than that for their dialer to connect them to me.
The ones that infuriate me are the dialers that call you and when you answer they put you on hold. I will stick around for them, and tell them exactly what I think about calling me to try and sell me something and start out by putting me on hold.
The people who shit out that idea for a dialer need to be molested with a cactus.
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Bundesrepublik Deutschland. Of course!
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The people who shit out that idea for a dialer need to be molested with a cactus.
FTW!
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There was sense in this thread?
Yes, but it's gone into hiding for fear of its life.
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@accalia said:
BRD
Biohazard Rated Discourse?
I wish, that would be more interesting
no, it's Business Requirements Document.
basically technical specs but in business person speak not technical person speak, and i get to turn it itno the technical specs that will drive the project.
yay!
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technical specs but in business person speak not technical person speak
With or without the budgetary limits?
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With or without the budgetary limits?
that's next weeks fight. they think we can build it for two bits of string and an old peanut shell. We're going to argue that we need two Ferrari's each to build it.
I anticipate that they'll negotiatie us down to a rather nice sedan or possibly a light duty truck with a tow package before we accept (and that's about what we think it will cost anyway. not that i'm going to let them know that.)
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we need two Ferrari's each to build it
http://blogs.msdn.com/b/oldnewthing/archive/2015/10/27/10650331.aspx
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they think we can build it for two bits of string and an old peanut shell.
That's when you need to break out the memes.
http://www.jimchines.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/HaHaHa.jpg
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That's when you need to break out the memes.
yeah, the crazy thing is.... I'm pretty sure they know what number we're really thinking of when we ask for the Ferrari's before we even ask.
I'm not sure if this whole song and dance is because they like to be penny pinching assholes, or because the previous IT department was a bit of a pushover, or what. Cause i'd just as happily skip the fight if we're thinking of more or less the same number at the start....
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Status: Six months of user testing and nobody noticed it returns fatally stale data. Working around entity Frameworks tendency to CACHE ALL OF THE THINGS now.
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You know toilet seats are like $7 at Home Depot. You just kind of screw them in, takes like 5 minutes. Just sayin'.
If the previous plumped had installed a $7 toilet seat, I wouldn't be refactoring.
Yeah but in Texas he's liable to get roped to the back of a pickup and dragged along a gravel road at 45 MPH.
Imperialist. You're not respecting my other-measurement identification. And don't you fucking dare call it "metric", that's a label created by governments to fit everyone into a nice power-of-10 box.
Status: Printer, why did you feel the need to stop twice for cleaning in the middle of my 15 page print job?
Dirty, dirty print job.
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In case I wasn't clear... Deployed it to production. Did a personal sniff test to make sure everything was working and immediately detected the massive showstopper everyone else missed.
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Governments? What do you mean Governments? That flag has a gold flange! This is an admiralty court. You're out of your jurisdiction. Also you addressed this ticket to my straw man JAZZY JOSH. Thus it is invalid.
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31 posts were merged into an existing topic: The "Wario Belgium‌​s a Librarian with Guacamole" Topic
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Status: read some of that thread. Now I'm peckish for Rocky Mountain oysters.
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Why don't you just stop being a basement-dwelling aspie, and ask them what to use? You know, communication? Use a telephone, even. It's amazing.
It's almost like you've never dealt with the kind of person who simply won't give you an answer to that question before, instead preferring solely to wait for you to make a suggestion and shoot it down.
Which is ridiculous, because I know you read Raymond Chen's blog.
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Also you addressed this ticket to my straw man JAZZY JOSH. Thus it is invalid.
I think you meant "corporate entity".
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Almost had a vocal WTF at this email
How long do we keep supporting them when we are still waiting on payment from September 2014?
How about not at all?
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Governments? What do you mean Governments? That flag has a gold flange! This is an admiralty court. You're out of your jurisdiction. Also you addressed this ticket to my straw man JAZZY JOSH. Thus it is invalid.
Your arguments are sound and I have been properly put in my place.
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Status: Desktop mode on mobile is fun!
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Desktop mode on mobile is
fun!NOT A THING STOP USING DICKSORES WITHOUT COMPLYING TO OUR ONLY USE IT HOW WE TELL YOU TO LICENSEPost can't not be bullshit.
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Status: Desktop mode on mobile is fun!
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**Status:**strong text Tried to look at the messages page on my profile:
Tried to look at every other easily accessible page for my profile:
Tried to look at my preferences page:
Bravo, Dickshit. Bravo.
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I wanted to blame Discourse, but I remembered I forced my useragent to "desktop" due to some site being broken otherwise.
Man, if only we had some kind if responsive layout magic thing! But alas!
And besides, if we did they would probably be hard to
makebikeshed...
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Welcome to my life during the time I used public transportation.
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Boss: Well, that's the way the client wants it. Drop the constraint.
Why is the client deciding what kind of constraint you have? If UNIQUE isn't working for you anymore, restructure the system so the client gets what they want (for the price).
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Status: Stayed mostly away for a few days and have been catching up in a few threads. Has the past week or so been big on dumb/boring arguments or just the threads I figured I actually wanted to catch up on?
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STATUS: Over the last few days, my 7 years old cable modem has been on its final leg. I'm talking beyond @benlubar level download speeds here. This morning, I was down basically to dial up levels.
The cable guy just came in and gave me a new one. I'm finally back to 25/2.
Throughout all this, discourse felt about the same speedwise.
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They had some inconsistent data from their previous software (which never had proper constraints). When I pointed out that the data makes no sense they said they can work with it, can't be arsed to fix it, and that it's URGENT, NEED IT YESTERDAY (it wasn't).
I sure as fuck ain't messing with it, so they'll have to deal until they fix their shit.
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Status: quails for dinner!
stupid little bird things with hardly any flesh on the flimsy bones ... but at least it's tasty!
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Status: positively surprised by the Belgian government. Had to do some electronic registrations. It all worked. In Chrome. I even saw instructions for OSX and Linux. Just plug-in the e-ID in the build smartcard reader in my laptop. Install some small thingy that has mostly certificates in it. Log on. Enter pin code. Belgium's your uncle! The site's ugly and the deeper you dive the harder the navigation get but they even had the most important stuff on the landing page, go figure!
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Status: About to go to a monthly meeting with 90% of employees of my company, which we estimate the cost of in non-work at about 2USD/s.