Feed TSA officers pie for Thanksgiving



  • Not a wtf, but the following phrase had me imagining interesting conversations at the metal detectors:

    "Note: You can bring pies and cakes through the security checkpoint, but be advised that they might be subject to additional screening."

     

     TSA Officer: "Well, what do we have here?"

    Traveler: "Just a fresh pumpkin pie I baked."

    TSA Officer: "Yeah, well, we are gonna have to take a closer look at it" -- Takes pie -- "Hey, Jimmy, help me screen this pie!"
     



  • @WeatherGod said:

    Not a wtf, but the following phrase had me imagining interesting conversations at the metal detectors:

    "Note: You can bring pies and cakes through the
    security checkpoint, but be advised that they might be subject to
    additional screening."

     

     TSA Officer: "Well, what do we have here?"

    Traveler: "Just a fresh pumpkin pie I baked."

    TSA Officer: "Yeah, well, we are gonna have to take a closer look at it" -- Takes pie -- "Hey, Jimmy, help me screen this pie!"
     

    I guess you've never had to use the ol' nailfile-in-the-cake trick.



  • I remember a movie/show where someone was trying to bring a saw in a cake in to a prisoner, and the guards insisted on trying some of the cake before it was delivered. They needed to keep cutting more and more slices out of the cake with the cake-bringer carefully cutting to avoid the hidden saw. Eventually the remaining cake is in the perfect shape of the hidden saw, with the guards still somehow unaware of the plot. Comedy, obviously, but I don't remember what it was from.



  • @WeatherGod said:

     TSA Officer: "Well, what do we have here?"

    Traveler: "Just a fresh pumpkin pie I baked."

    TSA Officer: "Yeah, well, we are gonna have to take a closer look at it" -- Takes pie -- "Hey, Jimmy, help me screen this pie!"
     

    This is funniest when imagining it performed with Chief Wiggum's voice. 



  • I love pumpkin pie. 

     



  • @purge said:

    I love pumpkin pie. 

     

    Yes, but it's all about the pumpkin CAKE!!!! muahhahahaha 



  • @WeatherGod said:

    Not a wtf, but the following phrase had me imagining interesting conversations at the metal detectors:

    "Note: You can bring pies and cakes through the
    security checkpoint, but be advised that they might be subject to
    additional screening."

     

     TSA Officer: "Well, what do we have here?"

    Traveler: "Just a fresh pumpkin pie I baked."

    TSA Officer: "Yeah, well, we are gonna have to take a closer look at it" -- Takes pie -- "Hey, Jimmy, help me screen this pie!"
     

     

    For this you get some bonus point if you comes from outside of US. It's strictly fobidden to bring even an apple, crisps or whatever food from you homeland to us country. Everything gets destroyed at the entry of country. I'll never understand why.... I can't bring typical food from Europe to US friends, not that i actually have us friends :) 



  • @tchize said:

    For this you get some bonus point if you comes from outside of US. It's strictly fobidden to bring even an apple, crisps or whatever food from you homeland to us country. Everything gets destroyed at the entry of country. I'll never understand why....

    The US farming industry survives only through intensive care by the government. 



  • @asuffield said:

    @tchize said:

    For this you get some bonus point if you comes from outside of US. It's strictly fobidden to bring even an apple, crisps or whatever food from you homeland to us country. Everything gets destroyed at the entry of country. I'll never understand why....

    The US farming industry survives only through intensive care by the government. 

    I think it's probably to do with the US not wanting food being imported that doesn't meet their FDA regulations. Because of course, they have the best, safest food regulations in the world, and anything from elsewhere is laden with poison. And no matter that it's only a person bringing a few things in, they MIGHT sell it to unuspecting US citizens.

     

    I actually came across something (forgot what it was) with ingredients lists in multiple 'languages' - including USA, UK and Australia. Each of those three lists were DIFFERENT.



  • The cake is a lie.



  • @SuperousOxide said:

    I remember a movie/show where someone was trying to bring a saw in a cake in to a prisoner, and the guards insisted on trying some of the cake before it was delivered. They needed to keep cutting more and more slices out of the cake with the cake-bringer carefully cutting to avoid the hidden saw. Eventually the remaining cake is in the perfect shape of the hidden saw, with the guards still somehow unaware of the plot. Comedy, obviously, but I don't remember what it was from.

    The Kids in the Hall, I believe. Such a great show.



  • @m0ffx said:

    @asuffield said:
    @tchize said:

    For this you get some bonus point if you comes from outside of US. It's strictly fobidden to bring even an apple, crisps or whatever food from you homeland to us country. Everything gets destroyed at the entry of country. I'll never understand why....

    The US farming industry survives only through intensive care by the government. 

    I think it's probably to do with the US not wanting food being imported that doesn't meet their FDA regulations. Because of course, they have the best, safest food regulations in the world, and anything from elsewhere is laden with poison. And no matter that it's only a person bringing a few things in, they MIGHT sell it to unuspecting US citizens.

    I'm betting that is the excuse, rather than the political reality. Farmers == votes. 



  • @yet another Matt said:

    The cake is a lie.

    No, anyway this cake is great, it's so delicious and moist.

    I'm being so sincere right now. 



  • Well you can... its just a complete pain in the ass to do so.  Surely not worth the effort - well, at least for most things. 



  • @MustBeUsersFault said:

    No, anyway this cake is great, it's so delicious and moist. I'm being so sincere right now.

    Actually, my wife made angel food pumpkin cake the other night.  Seriously awesome stuff.   



  • @purge said:

    @MustBeUsersFault said:

    No, anyway this cake is great, it's so delicious and moist. I'm being so sincere right now.

    Actually, my wife made angel food pumpkin cake the other night.  Seriously awesome stuff.   

     Angel Food Pumpkin Cake?  Sounds like a new recipe for me to try out on the leftover pumpkin...
     



  • @tchize said:

    For this you get some bonus point if you comes from outside of US. It's strictly fobidden to bring even an apple, crisps or whatever food from you homeland to us country. Everything gets destroyed at the entry of country. I'll never understand why.... I can't bring typical food from Europe to US friends, not that i actually have us friends :) 

    This is mostly an issue with open foods, fresh fruits/vegetable and other perishables. There is a concern about bacterial/virus contamination.. think chicken sandwich from Asia (bird flu) or mutton/beef from the UK (BSE). This is also the reason why you have to declare on the entry form if you've been around livestock or farmland. Many countries also require pets/animals to go into quarantine for a certain time to avoid introducing foreign strains of diseases.

    That said, I've never had a problem with packaged foods and anything that's shrink wrapped. I'm pretty sure there are no restrictions on those -- if they are, I've never been stopped because of it.



  • @Nandurius said:

    @tchize said:

    For this you get some bonus point if you comes from outside of US. It's strictly fobidden to bring even an apple, crisps or whatever food from you homeland to us country. Everything gets destroyed at the entry of country. I'll never understand why.... I can't bring typical food from Europe to US friends, not that i actually have us friends :) 

    This is mostly an issue with open foods, fresh fruits/vegetable and other perishables. There is a concern about bacterial/virus contamination.. think chicken sandwich from Asia (bird flu) or mutton/beef from the UK (BSE). This is also the reason why you have to declare on the entry form if you've been around livestock or farmland. Many countries also require pets/animals to go into quarantine for a certain time to avoid introducing foreign strains of diseases.

    That said, I've never had a problem with packaged foods and anything that's shrink wrapped. I'm pretty sure there are no restrictions on those -- if they are, I've never been stopped because of it.

    Unless you are bringing a whole cow from the UK, you should be safe from BSE.  As far as I know, the disease can only be spread through ingestion of infected neurons.  Cattle feed gets infected when the head or spinal column of an infected cow is processed into food.  The roast beef sandwich you bought at Tesco should (hopefully) be all meat and safe from contamination.



  • @Jetts said:

    @Nandurius said:

    @tchize said:

    For this you get some bonus point if you comes from outside of US. It's strictly fobidden to bring even an apple, crisps or whatever food from you homeland to us country. Everything gets destroyed at the entry of country. I'll never understand why.... I can't bring typical food from Europe to US friends, not that i actually have us friends :) 

    This is mostly an issue with open foods, fresh fruits/vegetable and other perishables. There is a concern about bacterial/virus contamination.. think chicken sandwich from Asia (bird flu) or mutton/beef from the UK (BSE). This is also the reason why you have to declare on the entry form if you've been around livestock or farmland. Many countries also require pets/animals to go into quarantine for a certain time to avoid introducing foreign strains of diseases.

    That said, I've never had a problem with packaged foods and anything that's shrink wrapped. I'm pretty sure there are no restrictions on those -- if they are, I've never been stopped because of it.

    Unless you are bringing a whole cow from the UK, you should be safe from BSE.  As far as I know, the disease can only be spread through ingestion of infected neurons.  Cattle feed gets infected when the head or spinal column of an infected cow is processed into food.  The roast beef sandwich you bought at Tesco should (hopefully) be all meat and safe from contamination.

    You are probably safer (with respect to BSE) with British
    beef and cattle than almost any other nation. We had it, it was a big
    issue, so we acted, culling 4.4 million people, and banning the feeding
    of ground up cows to living ones. We'd now know almost instantly if it
    showed up again.

    BSE turned up in the USA in 2003. The FDA's response has been distinctly lacking.

    If the stuff is in your meat (which can occur readily through careless processing, even if you're not meant to be eating nervous tissue), normal cooking won't destroy it, and vCJD (the human form) can be caught be eating contaminated meat. 



  • @m0ffx said:

    so we acted, culling 4.4 million people



    That's a little harsh.



  • @m0ffx said:

    and vCJD (the human form) can be caught be eating contaminated meat. 

    That's still just a theory, which has been quite elusive to prove - that usually indicates there is something wrong with the theory. A competing theory says that only a small number of people with a genetic defect can be infected with vCJD in this manner - it makes about as much sense, and the available evidence supports both theories - but there really isn't much evidence at all.

    The primary infection mechanism for all forms of CJD is bad medical practices, most notably contaminated human growth hormone, but also blood transfusions and inadequate sterilisation of medical instruments. Cannibalism has also been positively connected to it.

    Bird flu is even further out there - there is not even a suspicion that anybody might have been infected from eating meat. All known cases of human infection were due to people interacting with live animals and fresh carcasses, mostly in food production facilities.



  • @m0ffx said:

    so we acted, culling 4.4 million people,

    Oh if only. 

    @m0ffx said:

    and banning the feeding
    of ground up cows to living ones.

    So why does McDonald's still operate? I'd have thought banning the feeding of ground beef (or mince, as it's called here) would have had some kind of effect on them.

    Assuming their burgers are actually made out of beef that is...
     



  • @Cap'n Steve said:

    @m0ffx said:

    so we acted, culling 4.4 million people



    That's a little harsh.

    DOH!

    Obviously I meant to say "culling 4.4 million cows"

    DOH DOH DOH! 



  • Foot and mouth desease is proably more of an issue than BSE, more contagious and a recurring problem in Europe.


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @ChZEROHag said:

    @m0ffx said:

    and banning the feeding
    of ground up cows to living ones.

    So why does McDonald's still operate? I'd have thought banning the feeding of ground beef (or mince, as it's called here) would have had some kind of effect on them.

    Assuming their burgers are actually made out of beef that is...
     

    I'd imagine that the "ground up cows" being fed to living ones would be the bits unsuitable for human consumption. Like the nervious tissue which contains the prions thought to cause BSE.

    And yes, McD's burgers are made out of beef. When I was going throught their management training course years back, part of it included tours of their manufacturing plants, one of which was one making the burgers. Nothing underhand went on there.

    You may want to spend a few minutes playing with Snope's search.

    Or for a less impartial view, their own website: http://www.makeupyourownmind.co.uk/question-search?key=beef+offal#question1 



  • @ammoQ said:

    Foot and mouth desease is proably more of an issue than BSE, more contagious and a recurring problem in Europe.

    I believe foot and mouth is exactly the reason they ask those questions about visiting any farms while traveling, or going to any farms when you get home.

    I've heard of farmers lying about this anyway when they fly home; depending on your farm its probably not worth the hassle of explaining.  "Yes, I am going to a farm.  No, I don't think my wheat or canola is in any danger of disease."



  • @PJH said:

    @ChZEROHag said:

    @m0ffx said:

    and banning the feeding
    of ground up cows to living ones.

    So why does McDonald's still operate? I'd have thought banning the feeding of ground beef (or mince, as it's called here) would have had some kind of effect on them.

    Assuming their burgers are actually made out of beef that is...
     

    I'd imagine that the "ground up cows" being fed to living ones would be the bits unsuitable for human consumption. Like the nervious tissue which contains the prions thought to cause BSE.

    And yes, McD's burgers are made out of beef. When I was going throught their management training course years back, part of it included tours of their manufacturing plants, one of which was one making the burgers. Nothing underhand went on there.

    You may want to spend a few minutes playing with Snope's search.

    Or for a less impartial view, their own website: http://www.makeupyourownmind.co.uk/question-search?key=beef+offal#question1 

    Um... </joke>?



  • @ChZEROHag said:

    @PJH said:
    @ChZEROHag said:

    @m0ffx said:

    and banning the feeding
    of ground up cows to living ones.

    So why does McDonald's still operate? I'd have thought banning the feeding of ground beef (or mince, as it's called here) would have had some kind of effect on them.

    Assuming their burgers are actually made out of beef that is...
     

    I'd imagine that the "ground up cows" being fed to living ones would be the bits unsuitable for human consumption. Like the nervious tissue which contains the prions thought to cause BSE.

    And yes, McD's burgers are made out of beef. When I was going throught their management training course years back, part of it included tours of their manufacturing plants, one of which was one making the burgers. Nothing underhand went on there.

    You may want to spend a few minutes playing with Snope's search.

    Or for a less impartial view, their own website: http://www.makeupyourownmind.co.uk/question-search?key=beef+offal#question1 

    Um... </joke>?

     

    I only eat top down beef 



  • @Helix said:

    @ChZEROHag said:
    @PJH said:
    @ChZEROHag said:

    @m0ffx said:

    and banning the feeding
    of ground up cows to living ones.

    So why does McDonald's still operate? I'd have thought banning the feeding of ground beef (or mince, as it's called here) would have had some kind of effect on them.

    Assuming their burgers are actually made out of beef that is...
     

    I'd imagine that the "ground up cows" being fed to living ones would be the bits unsuitable for human consumption. Like the nervious tissue which contains the prions thought to cause BSE.

    And yes, McD's burgers are made out of beef. When I was going throught their management training course years back, part of it included tours of their manufacturing plants, one of which was one making the burgers. Nothing underhand went on there.

    You may want to spend a few minutes playing with Snope's search.

    Or for a less impartial view, their own website: http://www.makeupyourownmind.co.uk/question-search?key=beef+offal#question1 

    Um... </joke>?

     

    I only eat top down beef 

    Top-down beef being that which is cut from the cow, eg steaks and joints, as opposed to bottom-up beef, which is made by causing lots of small fragments to adhere together in the desired shape, eg burgers.

    But then what would it be when one just eats the mince in its minced state, eg in a chilli con carne or spaghetti bolognese?
     



  • @m0ffx said:

    Top-down beef being that which is cut from the cow, eg steaks and joints, as opposed to bottom-up beef, which is made by causing lots of small fragments to adhere together in the desired shape, eg burgers.

    But then what would it be when one just eats the mince in its minced state, eg in a chilli con carne or spaghetti bolognese?

    Dinner time. 



  • @ChZEROHag said:

    @m0ffx said:

    Top-down beef being that which is cut from the cow, eg steaks and joints, as opposed to bottom-up beef, which is made by causing lots of small fragments to adhere together in the desired shape, eg burgers.

    But then what would it be when one just eats the mince in its minced state, eg in a chilli con carne or spaghetti bolognese?

    Dinner time. 

     

    stepwise refinement 



  • @asuffield said:

    @m0ffx said:

    and vCJD (the human form) can be caught be eating contaminated meat. 

    [...]

    Cannibalism has also been positively connected to it.

    [...]

    I should cut down on neighbours then until the epidemic breaks


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