Poll: To Beard or Not To Be?
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Continuing the discussion from Status: +++Divide By Cucumber Error. Please Reinstall Universe and Reboot+++:
Or...Google thinks I am an asshole and that I need to trim my beard? We all know how machines have trouble with figures of speech.
Beard poll. Do not lie to the computer—that's how Skynet starts...
- No beard.
- Eh, I shave sometimes but not every day.
- Yes beard.
- Mighty Gandalf.
- BEARD_NOT_FOUND.
Filed under: the difference between "No beard" and "BEARD_NOT_FOUND" is left as an exercise for the reader, now the word 'beard' just looks strange to me, like it's not a real word.
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On the top of the list of "shit I never thought would become a poll" is that post...
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Shit, I forgot to add Linux as one of the options...
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I have an evil goatee, mainly because I look about 12 with no facial hair but a full beard shows the patchy bits in my facial hair
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The notorious Matthew the Mild!
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If that beard were a hairstyle, it'd be a mullet.
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Yes, beard (goatee), but I keep it trimmed pretty short. Pretty much for the same reasons @Jaloopa stated. Though I've also been told it suits me regardless of that, so bonus points I guess.
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Normally beard, but clipped to grade 0 every week or so.
I occasionally take a Bic™ to it when I CBA.
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Mighty Gandalf best describes me right now. To the point that I get split ends if I'm not careful. It's pretty awesome when I have it braided, though.
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Normally short beard, trimmed to 1.2mm (or whatever the shortest the trimmer goes is) then left to grow for a couple of weeks and repeated.
Largely because:I look about 12 with no facial hair but a full beard shows the patchy bits in my facial hair
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Not to be that guy but the vast majority of the population is going to fall into "No beard" or "Beard not found". Results will be skewed.
("No beard" == shaved man, "Beard not found" == I'm unable to grow a beard for whatever reason?)
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But "Yes, beard," could have a lot of other interpretations.
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Hell, my own avatar contradicts me.
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I have a pointed beard. Makes my square jaw look less fat.
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Not vast majority.
Based on fermi, I'd say 75%. Large majority.
But that would be a scientific poll.
Girls are likely not going to participate.
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I'm lazy which is sad because I actually have good shaving stuff.
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Beards seem like a barrier to snuggling. But I never had anything like a boyfriend, so it's just me guessing, really.
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I thought "girls" would probably "No beard".
I wasn't sure whether to vote "Yes beard" or "Eh, I shave sometimes but not every day"—went for the latter as I probably will shave again at some point in the future...
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Beards seem like a barrier to snuggling.
Unless I've left it to get out too out of hand, I've never had any complaints.
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Well, top of her head is against my beard, buffered by all of her hair, so it works out.
I keep the mustache shaved off for kissing reasons, so it looks a little modern lincoln.
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I bounce between standard goatee and full wizard beard depending on how lazy I am around shaving in a particular month or so. If I leave it go too long the sides bother me when I sleep though, since I lay on my side.
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Beards seem like a barrier to snuggling.
Don't tell that to my wife. She loves my beard.
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Don't tell that to my wife. She loves my beard.
My ex would never let me grow a beard — except once, or maybe twice, a goatee for specific historical period events, then off. She once said that if I'd had a beard when we met, she wouldn't have even given me a second glance. Her opinion of my appearance is no longer relevant, so my beard disappears and reappears at my whim and/or laziness. Unfortunately, snuggling hasn't been a relevant consideration for quite a while.
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I don't have a beard, but it's not by anyone's choice.
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My ex would never let me grow a beard — except once, or maybe twice, a goatee for specific historical period events, then off. She once said that if I'd had a beard when we met, she wouldn't have even given me a second glance. Her opinion of my appearance is no longer relevant, so my beard disappears and reappears at my whim and/or laziness. Unfortunately, snuggling hasn't been a relevant consideration for quite a while.
Since my wife and I first met, I've only been clean shaven for special occasions, like our wedding. It's glorious.
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My largest beard ever was many years ago when I vowed to not get a haircut or trim my beard until a critical project (actually the first one I had total control over the software elements) was accepted by the customer.
Almost 18 months elapsed....when the fateful day came, I was sitting in the conference room with a pair of scissors...and soon visited a real barbershop.
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Since my wife and I first met, I've only been clean shaven for special occasions, like our wedding.
I hadn't been clean shaven from the time my beard started growing in my late teens until about a month and a half before I met my now-ex-wife. I had worn a Classical-era historical costume for Halloween1. My ponytail-length hair went well with the costume, but the beard didn't, so I had shaved for the first time about 10 or 15 years, and hadn't regrown it when I met her.
1 Something generally similar to this:
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/c/ce/Ralph_Earl_-Elijah_Boardman-_WGA7452.jpg
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That's what you look like?
I mean, I knew you were old, but times have changed.
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Men in my family do tend to live to a ripe old age, but not quite that old.
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No beard, mostly by choice.
Half-hearted attempts at sporting one have so far prematurely ended on some early morning (~9:30 AM), when finally fully waking up in front of the mirror, with a razer in one hand, and half of the face shaved clean.
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Men in my family do tend to live to a ripe old age, but not quite that old
Not not as old, but possible quite ripe????? <ducking and running>
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Ah, you see, what you're missing there is laziness. I'd probably be too lazy to shave before properly waking up and then contemplating whether I can be bothered to shave or not for at least a few more minutes.
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quite ripe?
For some definitions of ripe, yes:
5. arrived at the highest or a high point of development or excellence; mature.
6. of mature judgment or knowledge.
7. characterized by full development of body or mind.Occasionally, on days that I'm home by myself all day and don't get around to taking a shower, this definition may also apply:
1. Smelly or foul : smelling a bit ripeSome synonyms are rather nice. I would have no objection to being called "quite prepared, ready, accomplished, enlightened, enriched, finished, fit, informed, judicious, learned, matured, mellow, perfected, sagacious skilled, sound, versed and wise." (Unfortunately, the synonym "plump" is a bit more applicable than I'd like it to be.)
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Beards seem like a barrier to snuggling.
You won't be picking any more hair from between your teeth than whoever you're snuggling with.
But I never had anything like a boyfriend, so it's just me guessing, really.
Check in to the PDA thread?.
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Since my wife and I first met, I've only been clean shaven for special occasions, like our wedding
I won't be clean shaven for my wedding. Planning on getting a barber shave to be smooth in the shaved bits and neat and trimmed for the goatee
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I occasionally take a Bic™ to it when I CBA.
Incidentally I've done this a few times (random pic - not me):
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I don't have a beard, but it's not by anyone's choice.
Don't worry, someday you'll be old enough.
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I haven't actually shaved since this poll went up, so I had to change my vote to "Yes beard".
The last reply to this topic is now over 10 days old. My reply will bump the topic to the top of its list and notify anyone previously involved in the conversation.
I am sure I want to continue this old conversation.
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notify anyone previously involved in the conversation.
I got no notification.
As usual, Dischorse is a stinking liar.
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Tracking or Watching? You'll only get notifications of all replies if you're Watching.
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Correct - but Dischorse's stupid text doesn't say that.
It says it'll notify anyone involved - and it's a liar because that's untrue.
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You mean the toaster? Yeah, that's very poorly worded, I agree ;)
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My ex would never let me grow a beard — except once, or maybe twice, a goatee for specific historical period events, then off. She once said that if I'd had a beard when we met, she wouldn't have even given me a second glance.
Once when my wife was in Japan, I shaved off all facial hair. That was the first time I was clean-shaven since high school. When I went to pick her up at the airport, I got within a few feet of her before she recognized me. She freaked out at the change and told me that I had to grow my goatee back. I ended up growing out a beard and have left it for the last few years.