Mid-Senior Level C# ASP.NET Developer for PHP Drupal

mikeTheLiar

Job posting

@Required skills said:

4+ years of experience with PHP

So, the job title and job listing are a mismatch. But then...

@Desired skills said:

Sitecore, Ektron, DotNetNuke, Umbraco proficiency

Which are all .NET platforms. I feel like they might be searching for a while...

bstorer

Damn right they'll be searching for a while. Anyone who had the necessary experience with Ektron, DNN, and Drupal is either in an insane asylum, or dead by their own hand.

error

@mikeTheLiar said:

Sitecore, Ektron, DotNetNuke, Umbraco

As someone who has worked extensively with two of those four, let me be the first to say: "AHHHHHHH! AGHHHHHHH! AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHH! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

mikeTheLiar

@joe.edwards said:

@mikeTheLiar said:
Sitecore, Ektron, DotNetNuke, Umbraco

As someone who has worked extensively with two of those four, let me be the first to say: "AHHHHHHH! AGHHHHHHH! AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHH! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Which two? I'm curious because we're considering moving to Umbraco rather than the multi-headed hydra homebake we have right now.

aapis

I'm currently gaining experience in Sitefinity and I wish I was gaining experience in hanging myself instead. The only thing that keeps me going is that people tell me DNN is worse.

error

@mikeTheLiar said:

@joe.edwards said:
@mikeTheLiar said:
Sitecore, Ektron, DotNetNuke, Umbraco

As someone who has worked extensively with two of those four, let me be the first to say: "AHHHHHHH! AGHHHHHHH! AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHH! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Which two? I'm curious because we're considering moving to Umbraco rather than the multi-headed hydra homebake we have right now.

I haven't used Umbraco; though, in my experience, there's no such thing as well-developed CMS.

morbiuswilters

@bstorer said:

Damn right they'll be searching for a while. Anyone who had the necessary experience with Ektron, DNN, and Drupal is either in an insane asylum, or dead by their own hand.

That reminds me that I used to own the domains fanbox-sucks.com and ektron-sucks.com but nobody could think of anything to do with them so I finally just let them expire.

Edit: Also, pronoun-antecedent agreement.

dhromed

@morbiuswilters said:

Edit: Also, pronoun-antecedent agreement.

Agreement exists. Why are you bolding?

HardwareGeek

@dhromed said:

@morbiuswilters said:
Edit: Also, pronoun-antecedent agreement.

Agreement exists. Why are you bolding?

Anyone: singular. Their: plural. Agreement does not exist.

aapis

@joe.edwards said:

@mikeTheLiar said:
@joe.edwards said:
@mikeTheLiar said:
Sitecore, Ektron, DotNetNuke, Umbraco

As someone who has worked extensively with two of those four, let me be the first to say: "AHHHHHHH! AGHHHHHHH! AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHH! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Which two? I'm curious because we're considering moving to Umbraco rather than the multi-headed hydra homebake we have right now.

I haven't used Umbraco; though, in my experience, there's no such thing as well-developed CMS.

Umbraco isn't bad if you don't mind XSLT.

morbiuswilters

@aapis said:

Umbraco isn't bad if you don't mind XSLT.

"Libya's not bad, if you don't mind the steam-powered rape robots."

bstorer

@HardwareGeek said:

@dhromed said:
@morbiuswilters said:
Edit: Also, pronoun-antecedent agreement.

Agreement exists. Why are you bolding?
Anyone: singular. Their: plural. Agreement does not exist.

I obviously am using "their" in sense 3. It's part of the language now; deal with it.

bstorer

@aapis said:

Umbraco isn't bad if you don't mind XSLT.

That's like some sort of absurdist koan, right?

@bstorer said:

@HardwareGeek said:
@dhromed said:
@morbiuswilters said:
Edit: Also, pronoun-antecedent agreement.

Agreement exists. Why are you bolding?
Anyone: singular. Their: plural. Agreement does not exist.
I obviously am using "their" in sense 3. It's part of the language now; deal with it.

Now? "Their" has always been used as both singular and plural.

morbiuswilters

@bstorer said:

@HardwareGeek said:
@dhromed said:
@morbiuswilters said:
Edit: Also, pronoun-antecedent agreement.

Agreement exists. Why are you bolding?
Anyone: singular. Their: plural. Agreement does not exist.
I obviously am using "their" in sense 3. It's part of the language now; deal with it.

There is no sense 3 there. Is that the joke?

bstorer

@morbiuswilters said:

@bstorer said:
@HardwareGeek said:
@dhromed said:
@morbiuswilters said:
Edit: Also, pronoun-antecedent agreement.

Agreement exists. Why are you bolding?
Anyone: singular. Their: plural. Agreement does not exist.
I obviously am using "their" in sense 3. It's part of the language now; deal with it.

There is no sense 3 there. Is that the joke?

No. I'm just bad at ~~typing~~ life.

morbiuswilters

@bstorer said:

@morbiuswilters said:
@bstorer said:
@HardwareGeek said:
@dhromed said:
@morbiuswilters said:
Edit: Also, pronoun-antecedent agreement.

Agreement exists. Why are you bolding?
Anyone: singular. Their: plural. Agreement does not exist.
I obviously am using "their" in sense 3. It's part of the language now; deal with it.

There is no sense 3 there. Is that the joke?
No. I'm just bad at ~~typing~~ life.

Anyway, use of "their" is singular-normative and represents a hegemonic discourse by the privileged cis-singular against the oppressed trans-plural. Check your privilege. You really need to undergo a consciousness-raising exercise aimed at de-stigmatizing diverse viewpoints. I'm sure your local community college has a series of workshops available to reprogram your hegemonic POV.

Snooder

@morbiuswilters said:

@bstorer said:
@morbiuswilters said:
@bstorer said:
@HardwareGeek said:
@dhromed said:
@morbiuswilters said:
Edit: Also, pronoun-antecedent agreement.

Agreement exists. Why are you bolding?
Anyone: singular. Their: plural. Agreement does not exist.
I obviously am using "their" in sense 3. It's part of the language now; deal with it.

There is no sense 3 there. Is that the joke?
No. I'm just bad at ~~typing~~ life.

Anyway, use of "their" is singular-normative and represents a hegemonic discourse by the privileged cis-singular against the oppressed trans-plural.

Would you prefer the use of "zhe" as a less offensive pronoun?

error

@Snooder said:

@morbiuswilters said:
@bstorer said:
@morbiuswilters said:
@bstorer said:
@HardwareGeek said:
@dhromed said:
@morbiuswilters said:
Edit: Also, pronoun-antecedent agreement.

Agreement exists. Why are you bolding?
Anyone: singular. Their: plural. Agreement does not exist.
I obviously am using "their" in sense 3. It's part of the language now; deal with it.

There is no sense 3 there. Is that the joke?
No. I'm just bad at ~~typing~~ life.

Anyway, use of "their" is singular-normative and represents a hegemonic discourse by the privileged cis-singular against the oppressed trans-plural.

Would you prefer the use of "zhe" as a less offensive pronoun?

THON THINK INVENTED PRONOUNS ALWAYS SOUND STRANGE

HardwareGeek

@morbiuswilters said:

@bstorer said:
@morbiuswilters said:
@bstorer said:
@HardwareGeek said:
@dhromed said:
@morbiuswilters said:
Edit: Also, pronoun-antecedent agreement.

Agreement exists. Why are you bolding?
Anyone: singular. Their: plural. Agreement does not exist.
I obviously am using "their" in sense 3. It's part of the language now; deal with it.

There is no sense 3 there. Is that the joke?
No. I'm just bad at ~~typing~~ life.

Anyway, use of "their" is singular-normative and represents a hegemonic discourse by the privileged cis-singular against the oppressed trans-plural.

I don't even know what this means, if anything.@morbiuswilters said:

Check your privilege.

Local admin, but even so, Windows flat-out refused to allow me to install any Python modules into site-packages.@morbiuswilters said:

You really need to undergo a consciousness-raising exercise

Yes, I need to walk down the hall (exercise) to get more caffeine (consciousness-raising).@morbiuswilters said:

aimed at de-stigmatizing diverse viewpoints. I'm sure your local community college has a series of workshops available to reprogram your hegemonic POV.

What is the antecedent of "you" and "your?" Was this directed at me, bstorer, dhromed? I'm confused.

morbiuswilters

@HardwareGeek said:

I don't even know what this means, if anything.

That's obvious.

@HardwareGeek said:

What is the antecedent of "you" and "your?" Was this directed at me, bstorer, dhromed? I'm confused.

Don't oppress me with your demands for my beautiful, expressive voice to conform to your cultural stereotypes. It was directed at any white, cis, anti-queer male oppressor. You may not be interested in intersectionality, but intersectionality is interested in you.

Snooder

@morbiuswilters said:

@HardwareGeek said:
I don't even know what this means, if anything.

That's obvious.

@HardwareGeek said:
What is the antecedent of "you" and "your?" Was this directed at me, bstorer, dhromed? I'm confused.

Don't oppress me with your demands for my beautiful, expressive voice to conform to your cultural stereotypes. It was directed at any white, cis, ~~anti-queer~~ hetero abled male oppressor. You may not be interested in intersectionality, but intersectionality is interested in you.

FTFY

@morbiuswilters said:

@aapis said:
Umbraco isn't bad if you don't mind XSLT.

"Libya's not bad, if you don't mind the steam-powered rape robots."

Lybia is really behind the times.

error

@Zecc said:

@morbiuswilters said:
@aapis said:
Umbraco isn't bad if you don't mind XSLT.

"Libya's not bad, if you don't mind the steam-powered rape robots."
Lybia is really behind the times.

I know! Around here the rape robots are powered by rechargable lithium-ion cells.

Lorne Kates

@joe.edwards said:

@Zecc said:
@morbiuswilters said:
@aapis said:
Umbraco isn't bad if you don't mind XSLT.

"Libya's not bad, if you don't mind the steam-powered rape robots."
Lybia is really behind the times.
I know! Around here the rape robots are powered by rechargable lithium-ion cells.

Actually, steam power is a step forward. They used to be coal powered. But with more modern manufacturing techniques, these aren't your grandfather's steam-rape-bots. They're sleek, efficient, and now with 75% less internal scalding.

Me? I'll wait a few years until I can get a fusion powered rape-bot.

Or I'll just buy the gold-plated Rape Bot from Monster. It really gives the rape warm undertones, and makes it pop.

boomzilla

@Lorne Kates said:

Actually, steam power is a step forward. They used to be coal powered.

I realize I'm going a little OT here, but, coal power is steam power. What are they using to heat the water now?

Lorne Kates

@boomzilla said:

@Lorne Kates said:
Actually, steam power is a step forward. They used to be coal powered.

I realize I'm going a little OT here, but, coal power is steam power. What are they using to heat the water now?

Rape. The robots are powered by perpetual motion.

boomzilla

@Lorne Kates said:

Rape. The robots are powered by perpetual motion.

Seems like championing that sort of technology would undercut their oil industry. Big mistake.

Snooder

@boomzilla said:

@Lorne Kates said:
Rape. The robots are powered by perpetual motion.

Seems like championing that sort of technology would undercut their oil industry. Big mistake.

The oil is for lubrication.

bstorer

@boomzilla said:

@Lorne Kates said:
Rape. The robots are powered by perpetual motion.

Seems like championing that sort of technology would undercut their oil industry. Big mistake.

No worries. The oil industry as a whole is just a slightly more subtle form of rape.

Snooder

Actually now that I think about it, is there really any application for a rape robot? I mean, automation is intended to pass off a necessary but unpleasant task off to someone else. But doesn't that defeat the whole point of rape in the first place? I mean, if you aren't enjoying why the fuck bother?

bstorer

@Snooder said:

Actually now that I think about it, is there really any application for a rape robot?

Great. Now you tell me. Couldn't think of that before I built a dozen in them and let them loose in the old folks' home, could you?
@Snooder said:

I mean, automation is intended to pass off a necessary but unpleasant task off to someone else. But doesn't that defeat the whole point of rape in the first place? I mean, if you aren't enjoying why the fuck bother?

It's progress. You can't hold back the tide of automated rape, no matter how much it frightens and confuses you. Why don't you go join one of those Luddite communities where they only perform traditional rape? We won't even notice you've gone. We'll all be too busy zooming aound in our self-driving, self-raping super cars. Maybe we'll run into you one day when we're struck with a twinge of nostalgia, and decide to stop at the quaint roadside stand on the edge of your podunk commune. We'll spot you working the register as we browse through your hand-raped wares, and we'll wonder what drove you to this place. Sure, you'll be proud of your pre-industrial rapes, because you put your blood, sweat, and tears into each rape. But I want you to know that to us, your rapes are nothing but a novelty, relics of a bygone rape era. You just can't compare to a machine purpose-built to rape.

dhromed

Idea:

chastity belt that is also a fucking machine.

@Snooder said:

Actually now that I think about it, is there really any application for a rape robot? I mean, automation is intended to pass off a necessary but unpleasant task off to someone else. But doesn't that defeat the whole point of rape in the first place? I mean, if you aren't enjoying why the fuck bother?

Dude! Voyeurism??

error

@dhromed said:

Idea:
chastity belt that is also a fucking machine.

The Bad Ideas Thread is thataway.

@boomzilla said:

@Lorne Kates said:
Actually, steam power is a step forward. They used to be coal powered.

I realize I'm going a little OT here, but, coal power is steam power. What are they using to heat the water now?

Nuclear reactor, obviously.

morbiuswilters

@Snooder said:

Actually now that I think about it, is there really any application for a rape robot? I mean, automation is intended to pass off a necessary but unpleasant task off to someone else. But doesn't that defeat the whole point of rape in the first place? I mean, if you aren't enjoying why the fuck bother?

Rape isn't about sex, it's about guaranteeing the continued dominance of the Patriarchy. Of course you men would want rape-bots so you can oppress more women at once.

error

@morbiuswilters said:

@Snooder said:
Actually now that I think about it, is there really any application for a rape robot? I mean, automation is intended to pass off a necessary but unpleasant task off to someone else. But doesn't that defeat the whole point of rape in the first place? I mean, if you aren't enjoying why the fuck bother?

Rape isn't about sex, it's about guaranteeing the continued dominance of the Patriarchy. Of course you men would want rape-bots so you can oppress more women at once.

The subsidies and kickbacks to-and-from Big Rape ensure the rape machine (of rape machines) keeps on keeping on.

DrakeSmith

@joe.edwards said:

The subsidies and kickbacks to-and-from Big Rape ensure the rape machine (of rape machines) keeps on keeping on.

I thought government was the rape machine...

morbiuswilters

@DrakeSmith said:

@joe.edwards said:
The subsidies and kickbacks to-and-from Big Rape ensure the rape machine (of rape machines) keeps on keeping on.

I thought government was the rape machine...

That you don't take this as seriously as I do is proof of Rape Culture.

boomzilla

@morbiuswilters said:

@DrakeSmith said:
@joe.edwards said:
The subsidies and kickbacks to-and-from Big Rape ensure the rape machine (of rape machines) keeps on keeping on.

I thought government was the rape machine...

That you don't take this as seriously as I do is proof of Rape Culture.

True, but trivial. Everything is proof of Rape Culture.

Lorne Kates

@boomzilla said:

True, but trivial. Everything is proof of Rape Culture.

I could easily disprove rape culture. But doing so would only prove rape culture.

Fuck rape culture.

error

@Lorne Kates said:

Fuck rape culture.

Consensually?

morbiuswilters

@joe.edwards said:

@Lorne Kates said:
Fuck rape culture.

Consensually?

Yeah, Rape Culture is a total slut. Ironically, Rape Culture itself thinks all PIV is awesome so go wild.

morbiuswilters

@boomzilla said:

Everything is proof of Rape Culture.

With the sole exception of--for reasons I do not understand--rhubarb pie.

galgorah

@bstorer said:

Damn right they'll be searching for a while. Anyone who had the necessary experience with Ektron, DNN, and Drupal is either in an insane asylum, or dead by their own hand.

I'm picturing Sam Neil's character in "In The Mouth Of Madness".