Stronger together



  • I'm having a lazy day at the office, so I dug up an old e-mail from a CEO some years ago. We were merging with another company and had a "kick off" at a hotel with workshops and good food to boost morale. He came up with all sorts of crazy games (one of them having all of us write down what type of animal we were and let the person next to us read it out loud). Anyway:

    From: CEO

    Date: xx

    To: Everyone

    Subject: Stronger together.



    Dear team,



    Thank you very much for pleasant conversations, meetings and feedbacks yesterday.

    My belief on us as a team, our competence and experience, are even stronger.

    I am confident that we are in pole position in this growing market.



    In this phase there is and will be many questions – please do not hesitate to contact my at any times.

    The only thing you risk – is stupid answers:)



    I want all of you to know, especially my new team members, that my goal for each of you, is that you reach your fully potential as a human being. Only by this, we excel as an unique company. Then we will make a difference out in the market, and win in the competitor race.



    For your inspiration only, I want to share with you one of my favorite videos on youtube with Will Smith. (Yes it can be over the top – but I like it – and believe in the attitude). Please have a look when it suits you.



    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pfWGoLj1JCM



    All the best

    Make a good weekend!



    CEO



  • Is he a non-native English speaker? That would get you an F in any class I've ever been in. All that random punctuation makes my head spin.



  • @Dogsworth said:

    Is he a non-native English speaker? That would get you an F in any class I've ever been in. All that random punctuation makes my head spin.

    Yes, he was non-native. But he was still way beyond anything acceptable, often it was so bad it was difficult to comprehend what he was trying to say. He was really into crafting these "moments" and "emotions", and kind of let everything else slide.

    One day, he made us gather around him where he had a speech about the merging of the companies, and how we would work hard to overcome all hurdles. He compared us to the people of Israel and their journey through the desert, looking for the promised lands. Now guess who's Moses.



  • Holy schmoly. What moron uses Will Smith as a paragon of wisdom? I guess the same moron that builds emails out of cliches.



  • @arh said:

    Yes, he was non-native. But he was still way beyond anything acceptable, often it was so bad it was difficult to comprehend what he was trying to say.

    I've had a CEO that was worse than this in his native language (which was not English). Fortunately he compensated any difficulties in understanding by marking all mail "Very important" in Outlook and using three exclamation points after every sentence!!!



  • @arh said:

    I am confident that we are in pole position
    First thought: impalement.


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