Joke
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A friend of mine also went through a nasty divorce. Towards the end they were at a party when they started arguing over who would get the children. He got so angry he threw a trifle at her and she got custody.
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@El_Heffe said:
@Ben L. said:
@RTapeLoadingError said:
tea rifle?trifle
17,300,000 results. Interesting.
Interesting...
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@RTapeLoadingError said:
That's really not a difficult question. He or she who leaves gets the children. That's how my parents stayed together. How do you think my wife and I stay together?A friend of mine also went through a nasty divorce. Towards the end they were at a party when they started arguing over who would get the children. He got so angry he threw a trifle at her and she got custody.
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@Zecc said:
@Ben L. said:
Interesting...
What the...? Where they find my locker padlock combination?
It must take you quite a while to open your locker.
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I once say a documentary where they said you should minimize the number of times you open and close your fridge door, to save on energy.
So now I just leave it open.
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@Zecc said:
I once say a documentary where they said you should minimize the number of times you open and close your fridge door, to save on energy.
So now I just leave it open.
And you're expending less physical energy than us suckers who have to keep opening and closing it.
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@Zecc said:
I once say a documentary where they said you should minimize the number of times you open and close your fridge door, to save on energy.
So now I just leave it open.
That's a pretty stupid thing to do as it'll be costing you a fortune to run the light that comes on when the door's open.
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@RTapeLoadingError said:
@Zecc said:
Are we absolutely sure it only comes on when it's open? I thought that was still up for debate.I once say a documentary where they said you should minimize the number of times you open and close your fridge door, to save on energy.
So now I just leave it open.
That's a pretty stupid thing to do as it'll be costing you a fortune to run the light that comes on when the door's open.
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@RTapeLoadingError said:
@Zecc said:
I once say a documentary where they said you should minimize the number of times you open and close your fridge door, to save on energy.
So now I just leave it open.
That's a pretty stupid thing to do as it'll be costing you a fortune to run the light that comes on when the door's open.
Lightbulbs? It's much cheaper to just keep a couple candles burning in there.
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@Lorne Kates said:
@RTapeLoadingError said:
@Zecc said:
I once say a documentary where they said you should minimize the number of times you open and close your fridge door, to save on energy.
So now I just leave it open.
That's a pretty stupid thing to do as it'll be costing you a fortune to run the light that comes on when the door's open.
Lightbulbs? It's much cheaper to just keep a couple candles burning in there.
Doesn't the flame freeze?
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@RTapeLoadingError said:
@Lorne Kates said:
@RTapeLoadingError said:
@Zecc said:
I once say a documentary where they said you should minimize the number of times you open and close your fridge door, to save on energy.
So now I just leave it open.
That's a pretty stupid thing to do as it'll be costing you a fortune to run the light that comes on when the door's open.
Lightbulbs? It's much cheaper to just keep a couple candles burning in there.
Doesn't the flame freeze?
Don't be silly! It's a refrigerator, not a freezer!
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@RTapeLoadingError said:
Doesn't the flame freeze?
Eventually, but once the butter catches fire, it burns how enough to melt the candle's flame.
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@Chame1eon said:
Shouting to Sammy as he pulled the steering wheel, "better nate than lever,” he ran over the snake.THE END
That snake wasn't very shaggy.
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CS is stupid.
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Copypasta:
So this guy is taking his girlfriend to the high school prom. And he's got a lot of work to do.
First he has to rent a tux, so he goes to the tuxedo store. But there's a huge tuxedo line at the store. Finally he gets out of there and realizes he has to go buy a corsage, so he goes to a florist. But there's this big long corsage line at the florist. Finally he gets the corsage and has his tux and he's gotta go rent a limo. But there's this huge line when he gets to the limo place.
Finally after waiting and making all the arrangements, it's the night of the prom. He picks her up and takes her down there to get in, but there's this huge ticket line at the door. Finally they get in and they start dancing and having fun, and she says to him, "I'm hungry," so he goes to get her some food, but there's this huge buffet line. He gets her some food and they eat and they're dancing again and she says, "Now I'm thirsty, can you get me a drink?" So he goes to get her a drink and there's no punchline.
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One day after work a guy goes out drinking with some frineds. He gets really drunk and vomits all over himself. He says "Oh no, my wife is going to kill me when she sees that I puked all over my suit".
One of his friends says "Put a 20 dollar bill in your jacket pocket. When you get home, tell your wife some guy threw up on you, and then pull out the 20 dollar bill and say that the guy gave you 20 dollars to get your suit cleaned".
"That's a great idea!" the guy says. And so he goes home.
When he walks into the the house his wife looks at him and says "What the hell happened to you?"
And he says "Some guy was drunk and threw up all over me. But he gave me 20 dollars to pay for cleaning my suit", and he points to the 20 dollar bill sticking out of his pocket.
His wife pulls out the money and says "Hey, there's two 20 dollar bills here".
Oh yeah", the guy says, "The other one is from the guy who shit in my pants."
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I am not understanding this joke. Is the person in army uniform a cop, peeing on sign?
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He is a U.S. Army corporal.
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@Nagesh said:
I am not understanding this joke. Is the person in army uniform a cop, peeing on sign?
He is a character from a TV show and his nickname is "Radar".
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@ekolis said:
"NO!" cries Bill. "I was just about to tell him! 'If the foo shits, wear it!'"
Even after googling, I still don't "get" this joke.
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@clively said:
@ekolis said:
If the shoe fits, wear it."NO!" cries Bill. "I was just about to tell him! 'If the foo shits, wear it!'"
Even after googling, I still don't "get" this joke.
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I don't like how homophobia is called homophobia.
They stole the name I would have used to describe people afraid of homonyms.
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@Ben L. said:
I don't like how homophobia is called homophobia.
You want to steal the word that should have been used to describe people afraid of homographs? And what about those scared of homonyms? And lets not get started on those scared of heteronyms...They stole the name I would have used to describe people afraid of homonyms.
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I met a girl who told me she is Russian.
I said "What's your hurry?"
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@Ben L. said:
I don't like how homophobia is called homophobia.
Don't tell me you're homophobiphobic.
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@joe.edwards said:
@Ben L. said:
I don't like how homophobia is called homophobia.
Don't tell me you're homophobiphobic.That's a scary scary thought.
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@Ben L. said:
Are we absolutely sure it only comes on when it's open? I thought that was still up for debate.
Got a smartphone? You have the perfect tool for checking if that's true.
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@dkf said:
@Ben L. said:
Are we absolutely sure it only comes on when it's open? I thought that was still up for debate.
Got a smartphone? You have the perfect tool for checking if that's true.Filed under: unless the fridge notices the smartphone and decides to trick it
I think the fridge is more likely to work in cahoots with the smartphone to trick you. Electronic devices can be so cliquey.
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@RTapeLoadingError said:
@dkf said:
Now where is that damned clicker?@Ben L. said:
Are we absolutely sure it only comes on when it's open? I thought that was still up for debate.
Got a smartphone? You have the perfect tool for checking if that's true.Filed under: unless the fridge notices the smartphone and decides to trick it
I think the fridge is more likely to work in cahoots with the smartphone to trick you. Electronic devices can be so cliquey.
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@joe.edwards said:
@RTapeLoadingError said:
Having sex with your phone in the fridge.@dkf said:
Now where is that damned clicker?@Ben L. said:
Are we absolutely sure it only comes on when it's open? I thought that was still up for debate.
Got a smartphone? You have the perfect tool for checking if that's true.Filed under: unless the fridge notices the smartphone and decides to trick it
I think the fridge is more likely to work in cahoots with the smartphone to trick you. Electronic devices can be so cliquey.
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@Ben L. said:
@joe.edwards said:
How'd you know where I put my phone when I do that?@RTapeLoadingError said:
Having sex with your phone in the fridge.@dkf said:
Now where is that damned clicker?@Ben L. said:
Are we absolutely sure it only comes on when it's open? I thought that was still up for debate.
Got a smartphone? You have the perfect tool for checking if that's true.Filed under: unless the fridge notices the smartphone and decides to trick it
I think the fridge is more likely to work in cahoots with the smartphone to trick you. Electronic devices can be so cliquey.
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@joe.edwards said:
@Ben L. said:
@joe.edwards said:
How'd you know where I put my phone when I do that?@RTapeLoadingError said:
Having sex with your phone in the fridge.@dkf said:
Now where is that damned clicker?@Ben L. said:
Are we absolutely sure it only comes on when it's open? I thought that was still up for debate.
Got a smartphone? You have the perfect tool for checking if that's true.Filed under: unless the fridge notices the smartphone and decides to trick it
I think the fridge is more likely to work in cahoots with the smartphone to trick you. Electronic devices can be so cliquey.
lekmi'i le fonxa po'e la .jo,eduardz. .ijanai le veltivmi'e po'e la .jo,eduardz. cu gletu la .jo,eduardz.
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Lol too funny!
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Yes this is probably what i would do too.
