Priorities



  • We just received an email from the CEO instructing everyone to "STOP ALL WORK" for the next 6 months on any projects not on the new priorities list. Ok, that makes sense. There is more work to be done than bodies and/or time in which to do it, so they prioritized everything. Joy. Then I looked at the attached firm-wide project priorities list:

    1 - add feature a; reason: customer wants feature a
    2 - add feature b; reason: customer wants feature b
    ...
    218 - add feature 218; reason: customer wants feature 218
    219 - performance: make the system run faster; reason: customers are threatening to leave if the system doesn't run faster

    Soooo close...



  • I think I see the problem. Everything there is important, so it should all be priority 1.



  • Somehow I really wanted to see a deadlock on number 1 and 2, but it was an illusion.



  • @snoofle said:

    219 - performance: make the system run faster; reason: customers are threatening to leave if the system doesn't run faster

    Your longstanding if somewhat Sysiphean task is on the list, so you don't have to stop work on it, right?



  • Just do what my last company did: make everything higher priority than everything else. Prob sol.



  • Assume that since 219 > 1, 219 must be more important.



  • @hunter9000 said:

    Just do what my last company did: make everything higher priority than everything else. Prob sol.
    It doesn't affect me at all. Ironically, they just gave me 1/3 of the total staff to work on performance issues, so all the other project managers are screaming that they can't get their features implemented. Who knows, maybe I'll be able to overcome the crapalanche and make some more headway (it's official: ALL of the sleep's are finally gone!)


  • ♿ (Parody)

    @snoofle said:

    it's official: ALL of the sleep's are finally gone!

    Did they buy new fans or has the rest of the system slowed it down enough that natural slowness keeps it cool?



  • @snoofle said:

    (it's official: ALL of the sleep's are finally gone!)

    I assume there's an upcoming story there? How'd you manage to force this down the upstream producers and downstream consumers?



  • What I don't understand is why Snoofle has that beautiful picture of his boss in the targeting reticle but never pulls the trigger.



  • @KarenM said:

    What I don't understand is why Snoofle has that beautiful picture of his boss in the targeting reticle but never pulls the trigger.

    I'd always assumed that was snoofie..



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    @KarenM said:
    What I don't understand is why Snoofle has that beautiful picture of his boss in the targeting reticle but never pulls the trigger.

    I'd always assumed that was snoofie..

    +1



  • @snoofle said:

    [...], so they prioritized everything.
    This is what we say at work: if everything is high priority, nothing is high priority. The non-engineers find this concept a bit difficult tro grasp; they think that if something is made high priority, we start working harder, or time moves slower, or something of he sort, so that it gets finished earlier.

    It takes a while to explain that we're really can't devote more time to development, what with having to check Facebook and play Candy Crush, and we also haven't found a way to bend time without significantly raising the budget.


     



  • Well, everyone knows that to resolve performance bottlenecks all you have to do is to [url=http://thedailywtf.com/Articles/Welcome-to-the-New-Order.aspx]reverse the order...[/url]



  • @Ben L. said:

    @morbiuswilters said:
    @KarenM said:
    What I don't understand is why Snoofle has that beautiful picture of his boss in the targeting reticle but never pulls the trigger.

    I'd always assumed that was snoofie..

    +1

    I always believed it was a dude playing battleship



  • Yay, for all gone sleeps! :D


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