Who's the Daddy?



  • Just wanted to let you guys know I've joined the ranks of Jeff Atwood and am now the proud father of three: twins (boy and a girl) and a toddler (boy).

    First born came out at 4.3kg (9lb 8oz) just over two years ago and the twins are only 3kg (6lb 10oz) and 2.6kg (5lb 11oz) so they are tiny in my eyes, even though they are apparently a good size for twins.

    What everyone seems to think is a WTF is that my wife delivered them normally, not via c-section. Also that they were conceived naturally. Also that I get on with my mother-in-law!

    That is all.



  • @Zemm said:

    Just wanted to let you guys know I've joined the ranks of Jeff Atwood

    NooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

    @Zemm said:

    and am now the proud father of three

    Phew. Thought you were talking about creating the next StackHorror or ServerOverflow or something...

     

    Anyway: congrats and best wishes to the Mobile Incubation Unit (now repurposed as a Delivery Module).

    It's nice to hear of another PHP coder emerging into the world.



  • @Zemm said:

    Also that I get on with my mother-in-law!

    Rather odd choice of phrasing there...



  • @ekolis said:

    @Zemm said:
    Also that I get on with my mother-in-law!

    Rather odd choice of phrasing there...

     

    I don't understand?

    Everyone is meant to hate their mother-in-law (I know my wife does!) but I don't. I've spent the last couple of days with her and she's been good. She's been looking after the toddler while I've been at the hospital and doing cleaning/washing/etc of our house without being asked: even paying for cleaning products and general groceries. I think she's very excited about more grandchildren! She does laugh at us for having three under three...




  • Congratulations!



  •  Congratulations!

      Just keep an eye on them, I hear Australia is a deathtrap. Sharks, tiny lethal jellyfish, giant venomous spiders, orcs, vampires... be careful.



  • @Zemm said:

    I don't understand?

    He probably read it as:

    @Not Zemm said:
    Also that I get it on with my mother-in-law!

     or:

    @Not Zemm said:

    Also that I get on my mother-in-law!
     

    @DOA said:

    Sharks, tiny lethal jellyfish, giant venomous spiders, orcs, vampires...

    .. stingray, the Toe Cutter...

     




  • @DOA said:

    Just keep an eye on them, I hear Australia is a deathtrap. Sharks, tiny lethal jellyfish, giant venomous spiders, orcs, vampires... be careful.
    Only if you take your children outside of built-up areas or to beaches.



  • @DOA said:

     Congratulations!

      Just keep an eye on them, I hear Australia is a deathtrap. Sharks, tiny lethal jellyfish, giant venomous spiders, orcs, vampires... be careful.

    I'd be more concerned about the women who glow and men who chunder.



  • Congrats, Zemm! Don't know if I could have coped with twins; my three keep me busy enough as it is. Hope you caught up on your sleep, because you're not going to get much for a while...



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    @DOA said:

     Congratulations!

      Just keep an eye on them, I hear Australia is a deathtrap. Sharks, tiny lethal jellyfish, giant venomous spiders, orcs, vampires... be careful.

    I'd be more concerned about the women who glow and men who chunder.

     

    Well the beer does flow, while the kookaburra sits in the old gum tree. I think it's laughing at me.

    DOA forgot the crocodiles, boxing kangaroos and drop-bears. Orcs are over in NZ, so we don't have to worry about them here.

    I've already had to wrestle two different blue tounge lizards away from my son.

    Twins were home yesterday, I got a lovely 4 hours of sleep in drips and drabs. One stops crying and the other starts. Don't expect much from me for the next couple of months.

     



  • Interesting fact is you have three kids, while people in our country are told to have only 2. Government will not pay for third kid. So which country do you live?

    I know it is Australia, but I mean, what KIND OF.



  • @Nagesh said:

    people in our country are told to have only 2

    My country is a steaming pile of WTF but even us don't have that problem, as a matter of fact our population is aging and natality rates are low(1 point something), maybe they'll start encouraging couples to have kids. AFAIK only China (unless you are a minority) and India enforce such measures.

    @Nagesh said:

    Government will not pay for third kid

    You can always sell it to some celebrity looking to adopt, apparently it is a "thing"

    @Nagesh said:

    I know it is Australia, but I mean, what KIND OF.

    Pure death, that is why you need so many children, so that one might survive
    http://www.cracked.com/funny-5997-the-animals-that-make-australia-deathtrap-it-is/



  • @Nagesh said:

    Interesting fact is you have three kids, while people in our country are told to have only 2. Government will not pay for third kid. So which country do you live?

    I know it is Australia, but I mean, what KIND OF.

    A less shitty one than India, evidently.



  • @Nagesh said:

    Interesting fact is you have three kids, while people in our country are told to have only 2. Government will not pay for third kid.

    Hang on... you saying that your govt. actually PAYS for you to spawn?

    Or are you legislated to produce?

    Your ways are somewhat alien to me...


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @Cassidy said:

    @Nagesh said:
    Interesting fact is you have three kids, while people in our country are told to have only 2. Government will not pay for third kid.
    Hang on... you saying that your govt. actually PAYS for you to spawn?
    It happens in the UK too, unfortunately:


    And I'm sure that's not all of them.

    All subsidised by those that don't have children. I've deliberately not included other things like education and health care in that list - those I think should be shared.


  • @PJH said:

    It happens in the UK too, unfortunately...

    Some vitrolic retort that screamed the differences between passive support and active encouragement sprung to mind.

    But then I remembered "Shameless" and sadly realised how right your list was.

    This country's going to the dogs. I gain some measure of satisfaction when I look at Greece and realise our situation isn't as bad, but it's a hollow victory.

    (speaking of victory... take THAT, Munich! Whosa Daddy Nao?)

     



  • @Cassidy said:

    This country's going to the dogs. I gain some measure of satisfaction when I look at Greece and realise our situation isn't as bad, but it's a hollow victory.

    This is how I feel when I look at the UK. It's nice to know you have someone to look down on, too. Surely the Greeks have their own Greece to look down on, like perhaps Cuba.

    Socialism will make fools of us all.



  • @Cassidy said:

    Hang on... you saying that your govt. actually PAYS for you to spawn?

    If you make under $75000 and aren't on parental leave pay, the Australian Government pays you $897.77, then a fortnight later you get another $397.77 for the next 12 fortnights.



  • @Cassidy said:

    Hang on... you saying that your govt. actually PAYS for you to spawn?

    I think they pay you to spawn less, there is an overcrowding issue there.
    @Cassidy said:
    are you legislated to produce?

    Almost all governments try to control population growth, countries with low birthrates will offer benefits for couples with children and others will high bithrates like China and India will try to force you to have only 1 or 2 kids at most.
    @Cassidy said:
    Your ways are somewhat alien to me

    That is why tech support and outsourcing sucks



  • @Cassidy said:

    @Nagesh said:

    Interesting fact is you have three kids, while people in our country are told to have only 2. Government will not pay for third kid.

    Hang on... you saying that your govt. actually PAYS for you to spawn?

    Or are you legislated to produce?

    Your ways are somewhat alien to me...

    Government school education only allowed for first two kids. Third kid will have to stay un-educated or go to privet school.

    Also no tax-credit on 3rd child and I think first two child's tax credit also canceled if you have third one.


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @Nagesh said:

    or go to privet school
    You have schools dedicated to horticulture?



  • @PJH said:

    @Nagesh said:
    or go to privet school
    You have schools dedicated to horticulture?

    We have krishi vidyalaya (Farming collage). Why do you ask? India's # 1 occupation is farming and not call-center as you people in west world, like to think.



  • @Nagesh said:

    @PJH said:
    @Nagesh said:
    or go to privet school
    You have schools dedicated to horticulture?

    We have krishi vidyalaya (Farming collage). Why do you ask? India's # 1 occupation is farming and not call-center as you people in west world, like to think.

    When somewhere around 40% of produce goes bad on the way to being sold, it's not all that shocking Source

  • ♿ (Parody)

    @Nagesh said:

    @PJH said:
    @Nagesh said:
    or go to privet school
    You have schools dedicated to horticulture?

    We have krishi vidyalaya (Farming collage). Why do you ask? India's # 1 occupation is farming and not call-center as you people in west world, like to think.

    If your number one occupation is farming...You might be a third world country.



  • @Douglasac said:

    If you make under $75000 and aren't on parental leave pay, the Australian Government pays you $897.77, then a fortnight later you get another $397.77 for the next 12 fortnights.

    Per child. If my wife was working she'd get paid leave for one and the "baby bonus" for the other. But we are getting two baby bonuses instead. I missed out on paid paternal leave though. It's currently 3am and I have a two-week-old on my chest asleep. He doesn't mind the keyboard tapping and mouse clicking, but if I try and put him back in the cot he'll wake up. Spoilt :-/ His sister isn't as particular.



  • @Nagesh said:

    India's # 1 occupation is farming and not call-center as you people in west world, like to think.

    We only think because every time we ring a call-centre we get someone with an Indian accent. Every time we watch farming shows we don't see Indians.

    Our truth is based upon perception, after all.


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