Yesterday at the Outback



  • I was eating dinner at the bar at the Outback when an elderly couple (mid 70's) walked in, sat across the bar, and ordered a beer for her and a shot for him. She chugged half the beer while he gulped the shot.

    Me and the guy next to me just looked at each other. We watched them sit and chat for a while. She chugged the rest of the beer. He gulped another shot. This went on for half an hour.

    Don't get me wrong, I'm not knocking the old folks. I just hope I can keep up when I'm that age...



  • Well you were in the outback mate.  You know you can't drink the water there, and the alchohol is the only thing that will kill the rest fo the germs you encounter.

    This isn't the same as sitting in a resturant in America you know.



  • @KattMan said:

    Well you were in the outback mate.
    "The Outback" - The only genuine Oz things in the place come from the wine menu. They don't even sell burgers with fried eggs or beetroot on them, the lamb is from Enzed and even the Fosters is made under license (in Canada I think).



  • @snoofle said:

    Don't get me wrong, I'm not knocking the old folks. I just hope I can keep up when I'm that age...
    Years ago I used to see this couple in their 60's or 70's out dancing salsa every saturday night. Nothing flash, but they were on the dance floor for pretty well every song, and enjoying every minute of it.



  •  I watched one night as a small little asian girl drank my friend under the table.  They ordered two sets of three wise men shots.  One for each.  She drank all three shots in under a minute while my buddy, who is known for pounding drinks and weighs about 250lbs, struggled to get 2 down in 3 minutes.

     

    We also used to have this couple in their 70's show up all the time to death metal shows.  They'd be right up front banging their heads.



  • @galgorah said:

    ...We also used to have this couple in their 70's show up all the time to death metal shows.  They'd be right up front banging their heads.
    At that point I am sure they already have lost most of their hearing so why not.  It might actually come out at a nice decible level for them to hear it.



  • don't make fun of the old folks, you'll be there yourself one day ... karma is a bitch ...

    :ow: my back hurts

    GET OFF MY LAWN

    (nearly 1/2 a century old)



  •  When my mom was 83 she had to quit playing tennis. She was okay with winning one out of three games, but had to quit when her average dropped.

     



  • When a person attains the age of 65 they should be ground into a fine, nutritious paste. They are no longer productive members of society and we dishonor them by making them dependent on us. This will reduce spending on Medicare and Social Security, as well as providing a cheap source of nutritional energy for the indigent. The Alaskan Inuit do something very similar and everybody knows their culture is more authentic and superior to our own.



  • @OzPeter said:

    @KattMan said:
    Well you were in the outback mate.
    "The Outback" - The only genuine Oz things in the place come from the wine menu. They don't even sell burgers with fried eggs or beetroot on them, the lamb is from Enzed and even the Fosters is made under license (in Canada I think).

    And no one flings their pickles on the ceilings... or is that just at Burger King? (trying to remember my aussie folklore from my aussie friend).



  • @tweek said:

    And no one flings their pickles on the ceilings... or is that just at Burger King?

    Pickles on the ceiling?



  • @tweek said:

    And no one flings their pickles on the ceilings... or is that just at Burger King? (trying to remember my aussie folklore from my aussie friend).
    Except that BK is not a brand name in Oz - its Hungary Jack's there, pickles are an merkin introduced obnoxious species.



  • @OzPeter said:

    merkin

    No.

    Hey ShadowMod, can we get some Rosie here whenever some Euro-weenie uses "merkin" for "American"? Because seriously.



  • @OzPeter said:

    @tweek said:
    And no one flings their pickles on the ceilings... or is that just at Burger King? (trying to remember my aussie folklore from my aussie friend).
    Except that BK is not a brand name in Oz - its Hungary Jack's there, pickles are an merkin introduced obnoxious species.

    What the fuck do you have against pickles?



  • @blakeyrat said:

    Hey ShadowMod, can we get some Rosie here whenever some Euro-weenie uses "merkin" for "American"? Because seriously.

    But it's still OK for us non-Euro-weenies to use it right?  And USian?

    Edit: Also, pretty sure you've got the wrong continent there.



  • @locallunatic said:

    But it's still OK for us non-Euro-weenies to use it right? And USian?

    No.

    I will murder you.

    I will also murder you for saying "USian".

    @locallunatic said:

    Edit: Also, pretty sure you've got the wrong continent there.

    Australians are definitely Euro-weenies. So are Kiwis, from my experience.



  • @blakeyrat said:

    @locallunatic said:
    But it's still OK for us non-Euro-weenies to use it right? And USian?
    No.

    I will murder you.

    I will also murder you for saying "USian".

    I'm just wondering why they set you off.  Is it maybe a regional thing?  Cause I definately heard both used where I grew up, so they seem fine to me. 

    @blakeyrat said:

    @locallunatic said:
    Edit: Also, pretty sure you've got the wrong continent there.
    Australians are definitely Euro-weenies. So are Kiwis, from my experience.

    OK, don't have much personal experience in dealing with people from there.



  • @locallunatic said:

    I'm just wondering why they set you off.  Is it maybe a regional thing?  Cause I definately heard both used where I grew up, so they seem fine to me. 

    I call bullshit. I've never heard someone use the word "merkin" to refer to Americans; I've only seen it a few times on this site. I doubt most people would use it because of its primary meaning. As far as USian, I've seen it online but never heard anyone say it. It's still dumb.



  • I've only heard Merkin when someone is making fun of your typical hillbilly, imitating the drawl.  Or imitating Bush.



  • @Sutherlands said:

    I've only heard Merkin when someone is making fun of your typical hillbilly, imitating the drawl.  Or imitating Bush.

    In that case it should be 'Merikin or 'Mer'kin. "merkin" is a pubic wig.


  • ♿ (Parody)

    @locallunatic said:

    @blakeyrat said:
    I will also murder you for saying "USian".

    I'm just wondering why they set you off.  Is it maybe a regional thing?  Cause I definately heard both used where I grew up, so they seem fine to me. 

    I've only seen USian online. It's usually used by Euroweenies and Americans who are both too politically correct to deserve respect and ignorant of geography. The typical justification is that other countries also located on continents with American in their names are slighted by referring to the only country in the world that uses the word American in its name bu using word American.



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    @Sutherlands said:

    I've only heard Merkin when someone is making fun of your typical hillbilly, imitating the drawl.  Or imitating Bush.

    In that case it should be 'Merikin or 'Mer'kin. "merkin" is a pubic wig.

    Thank you.

    Now let's get some Rosie O'Donnell action going.



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    @Sutherlands said:

    I've only heard Merkin when someone is making fun of your typical hillbilly, imitating the drawl.  Or imitating Bush.

    In that case it should be 'Merikin or 'Mer'kin. "merkin" is a pubic wig.

    Ah, didn't know that so I missed the other meaning caused by lazy spelling/capitalization/whatever.



  • @Sutherlands said:

    I've only heard Merkin when someone is making fun of your typical hillbilly, imitating the drawl.  Or imitating Bush.

     

    Who in turn was imitating Lyndon Johnson.

     



  • @blakeyrat said:

    Now let's get some Rosie O'Donnell action going.
    wearing a merkin?



  • @da Doctah said:

    @Sutherlands said:

    I've only heard Merkin when someone is making fun of your typical hillbilly, imitating the drawl.  Or imitating Bush.

     

    Who in turn was imitating Lyndon Johnson.

     

    Ah, LBJ, our drunkest President...



  • @blakeyrat said:

    @OzPeter said:
    merkin

    No.

    Hey ShadowMod, can we get some Rosie here whenever some Euro-weenie uses "merkin" for "American"? Because seriously.

    Euro-weenie??? I'm guessing that the short bus was slow taking you to school today.


  • @OzPeter said:

    Euro-weenie??? I'm guessing that the short bus was slow taking you to school today.

    You'll have to forgive him. Obviously, the correct pejorative for an Australian is "kangaroo-riding, crocodile-wrestling, Fosters-swilling sodomite".


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @morbiuswilters said:

    What the fuck do you have against pickles?
    In (fast food) burgers they tend to be thinly (laterally) sliced and engorged with vinegar, and rather vile as part of the burger. On my various trips to the states (to establishments that aren't McD's or their brethren,) they tend to be cut into quarters (longitudinally) from the whole pickle, served separately, and are actually edible (at least to the point where I usually got others' pickles since they just didn't like them period.)


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @morbiuswilters said:

    I call bullshit. I've never heard someone use the word "merkin" to refer to Americans;
    It's a play-on-words thing, conflating a contraction of 'american' with the pubic wig. I've heard it in the UK since the 80's (TV/radio). Not that it seems to have gained any traction in the interim - it's only listed as #6 on urban dictionary at the moment.



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    You'll have to forgive him. Obviously, the correct pejorative for an Australian is "kangaroo-riding, crocodile-wrestling, Fosters-swilling sodomite".
    Although that might be true of some Australians, I personally refer to myself as and those I associate with "awesome".



  • @Douglasac said:

    @morbiuswilters said:
    You'll have to forgive him. Obviously, the correct pejorative for an Australian is "kangaroo-riding, crocodile-wrestling, Fosters-swilling sodomite".
    Although that might be true of some Australians, I personally refer to myself as and those I associate with "awesome".

    You're right; I forgot to include "delusional" in there.



  • Leaving aside the nomenclature debate:
    @tweek said:

    And no one flings their pickles on the ceilings... or is that just at Burger King? (trying to remember my aussie folklore from my aussie friend).

    I've never seen this anywhere, so I'd say this bit of Aussie folklore is about as authentic as drop-bears.



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    Ah, LBJ, our drunkest President...
     

    Drunker than, say, Ulysses S Grant?

    I'm afraid I'm going to need a little documentation before I can accept that.



  • @Scarlet Manuka said:

    Leaving aside the nomenclature debate: @tweek said:
    And no one flings their pickles on the ceilings... or is that just at Burger King? (trying to remember my aussie folklore from my aussie friend).
    I've never seen this anywhere, so I'd say this bit of Aussie folklore is about as authentic as drop-bears.
     

    American tourists are the only people who must be wary of drop bears. Especially big white ones drinking rum. They are related to the bunyip, which is related to drinking the same rum.

    BTW I used to get heavy pickles on my Hungry Jacks Whopper. That way one got a fresh one, but now they make it after you order it so it doesn't matter. (Mmm I had a Whopper for lunch).

    I've been to an Outback in Japan: my wife loved/hated the "shiela's".


  • ♿ (Parody)

    @Douglasac said:

    @morbiuswilters said:
    You'll have to forgive him. Obviously, the correct pejorative for an Australian is "kangaroo-riding, crocodile-wrestling, Fosters-swilling sodomite".
    Although that might be true of some Australians, I personally refer to myself as and those I associate with "awesome".

    You should go talk to the "amazing" guy.



  • @boomzilla said:

    @Douglasac said:
    @morbiuswilters said:
    You'll have to forgive him. Obviously, the correct pejorative for an Australian is "kangaroo-riding, crocodile-wrestling, Fosters-swilling sodomite".
    Although that might be true of some Australians, I personally refer to myself as and those I associate with "awesome".

    You should go talk to the "amazing" guy.

     

    It would become a merger: awemazing.



  • Exactly. I still feel like I'm in my twenties. Society expects me to act sensible and middle-aged, but I don't want to.

    I hope I'm lucky enough to be around and feel the same when when I'm in my 70s!



  • @Sutherlands said:

    Or imitating Bush.

    I can't believe everybody missed that, especially after....@morbiuswilters said:
    "merkin" is a pubic wig.

    Sutherlands 1, Everyone else in this thread 0.



  •  You gon' keep necroing, you're gonna have a bad time, friend.



  • @dhromed said:

     You gon' keep necroing, you're gonna have a bad time, friend.

    You're just upset because I'm winning.



  •  Are you, Charlie? Are you?


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