Signs you're underqualified: bubble sort on your resume



  • I'm CC'd on some hiring emails. The position being advertised is for a "super-star computer vision engineer". Skills demanded are things like:

    • Image/video processing background
    • Machine learning knowledge
    • Pedestrian detection and tracking

    Among a variety of responses, some more impressive than others, there's a response from a guy whose resume includes "programming projects" such as

    Parallel Sorting Algorithms: Introduce common algorithms that put elements of a list in a certain order such as Bubble Sort, Merge Sort and Quick Sort.

    I mean, I'm not unimpressed with the M.S. in mathematics, and it's not like computer-vision is a math-light field. But that's really the most relevant technical experience I could find on the resume. You'd think someone smart enough to earn a M.S. might just possibly know better? perhaps? too much to ask? ...



  •  I'll come work for you but only if it's in a secret installation inside a volcano and the work I do is for hunter-killer robots.




  • At least he didn't list bogosort.



  • @Sutherlands said:

    At least he didn't list bogosort.

    import java.util.Random;
    

    public BogoComparator implements Comparable {

    private Random rng = new Random();

    @Override
    public int compareTo(Object o) {
    return 1 - rng.nextInt(3);
    }
    }



  • @DOA said:

     I'll come work for you but only if it's in a secret installation inside a volcano and the work I do is for hunter-killer robots.


    Does a Rovio tethered to a rolling plant stand with a life-size theatrical-quality cardboard cutout of a Stormtrooper on top count?



  •  Well, he wrote parallel sorting algorithms, and when studying them, bubble sort looks like a better candidate to start with, then heap-sort, say.

    And merge sort and quick sort are reasonable algos to continue with.



  • Well, if Barak Obabma knows about Bubble Sort, then why shouldn't everyone?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k4RRi_ntQc8



  • @zelmak said:

    Well, if Barak Obabma knows about Bubble Sort, then why shouldn't everyone?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k4RRi_ntQc8

     

    They even know about it Korea:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bw9CALKOvAI

     



  • @da Doctah said:

    @zelmak said:

    Well, if Barak Obabma knows about Bubble Sort, then why shouldn't everyone?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k4RRi_ntQc8

     

    They even know about it Korea:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bw9CALKOvAI

     

    Did they bubble sort the Koreas to determine which Korea was best Korea? That could explain a lot, actually.



  • @fennec said:

    Parallel Sorting Algorithms: Introduce common algorithms that put elements of a list in a certain order such as Bubble Sort, Merge Sort and Quick Sort.

    The word introduce makes it look like he just copy/pasted from a class description somewhere.


  • Fake News

    PROTIP: The more "advanced" the degree, the less reality-based the holder of same. Par exemple: Someone who holds a UChicago MBA can utterly convince himself that 10,000 images can be downloaded in twenty seconds, and it's up to you, you lowly developer with a mere BS in CS, to make it happen, no matter how many physical laws would need to be broken.



    • Image/video processing background

    Hmmm, my eyesight is bad but I use glasses so I'm good there

    • Machine learning knowledge

    I have learned a lot from my computer so ditto here

    • Pedestrian detection and tracking

    I have good periferal vision and I suppose I could tail somebody (never tried) so lets us put average here

    I also have bipedal motion with variable speed, opposable thumbs, among others many many more important skills.

    Contact me if interested



  • @serguey123 said:

    I also have bipedal motion with variable speed, opposable thumbs, among others many many more important skills.

    Contact me if interested

    Sorry, but you don't qualify - you live too far out in the uncharted backwaters of the unfashionable end of the Western Spiral arm of the Galaxy.



  • @flop said:

     Sorry, but you don't qualify - you live too far out in the uncharted backwaters of the unfashionable end of the Western Spiral arm of the Galaxy.

    How dare you discrimate me because of where I live?, my intergalactic EEO attorneys will be there shortly to collect all your money!



  • @serguey123 said:

    Filed under: and probably your left nut!
     

    How dare you discriminate against testicles because of where they live? Now my attorneys are going to go after you and your intergalactic EEO attorneys to collect all the money you collected!

     



  • @fennec said:

    @DOA said:
    I'll come work for you but only if it's in a secret installation inside a volcano and the work I do is for hunter-killer robots.

    Does a Rovio tethered to a rolling plant stand with a life-size theatrical-quality cardboard cutout of a Stormtrooper on top count?

    I'm sorry, but I just don't feel you guys are serious about world domination.

     



  • @fennec said:

    @da Doctah said:

    @zelmak said:

    Well, if Barak Obabma knows about Bubble Sort, then why shouldn't everyone?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k4RRi_ntQc8

     

    They even know about it Korea:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bw9CALKOvAI

     

    Did they bubble sort the Koreas to determine which Korea was best Korea? That could explain a lot, actually.

    Either way, the fact remains: mentioning bubble-sort on your resumé is a bad Korea move.




  • @DaveK said:

    resumé

    Wow.  That's the first time I've ever seen it spelled with one accent.  Is that like a résumé that you stopped reading, and then started again later?



  • Bubble sorts are hard..first the bubbles tend to float away, and if you are too rough they simply pop....before critizing the person, get a bottle of bubble mix, create a few dozen bubbles and YOU try to sort them.



  • @Sutherlands said:

    @DaveK said:

    resumé

    Wow.  That's the first time I've ever seen it spelled with one accent.  Is that like a résumé that you stopped reading, and then started again later?

    Well, normally I write it without any accents at all, so this time I decided to compromise half-way.

     

    Actually, no, I was simply wrong.  I wrote it how it's pronounced, or at any rate how I pronounce it, which sounds like "rez-ewe-may" and not like "rays-you-may".  I don't normally bother with the accents, and seeing how it's worked out for me, I probably won't bother again.

    Next time I'll just say "CV".

     



  • @DaveK said:

    @Sutherlands said:

    @DaveK said:

    resumé

    Wow.  That's the first time I've ever seen it spelled with one accent.  Is that like a résumé that you stopped reading, and then started again later?

    Well, normally I write it without any accents at all, so this time I decided to compromise half-way.

     

    Actually, no, I was simply wrong.  I wrote it how it's pronounced, or at any rate how I pronounce it, which sounds like "rez-ewe-may" and not like "rays-you-may".  I don't normally bother with the accents, and seeing how it's worked out for me, I probably won't bother again.

    Next time I'll just say "CV".

     

    Someone will find a way to fault you for improper use of the ligature in Curriculum Vitæ.

  • Garbage Person

    @lolwhat said:

    PROTIP: The more "advanced" the degree, the less reality-based the holder of same. Par exemple: Someone who holds a UChicago MBA can utterly convince himself that 10,000 images can be downloaded in twenty seconds, and it's up to you, you lowly developer with a mere BS in CS, to make it happen, no matter how many physical laws would need to be broken.
    MBAs are advanced degrees? I always thought they were some sort of trumped-up certificate. 



  • @Weng said:

    @lolwhat said:

    PROTIP: The more "advanced" the degree, the less reality-based the holder of same. Par exemple: Someone who holds a UChicago MBA can utterly convince himself that 10,000 images can be downloaded in twenty seconds, and it's up to you, you lowly developer with a mere BS in CS, to make it happen, no matter how many physical laws would need to be broken.
    MBAs are advanced degrees? I always thought they were some sort of trumped-up certificate. 

    He said "advanced" degrees, not advanced degrees.

    If you're really looking for trumped-up certificates, look no further than an Oxbridge MA. They don't even make you turn up to exams for that.



  • @mott555 said:

    @serguey123 said:

    Filed under: and probably your left nut!
     

    How dare you discriminate against testicles because of where they live? Now my attorneys are going to go after you and your intergalactic EEO attorneys to collect all the money you collected!

    In the following investigation it was found that your left and right testicle were guilty of inmigration fraud, your left testicle was deported and the right one imprisoned, after a few month of being butt raped by a fellow inmate called Bubba, it killed itself.


  • ♿ (Parody)

    @sanath123 said:

     I have gone through your problem i came to know that you have the knowledge of projects but you you dont have the exact idea & sequential steps of how to represents it.

    Step one: Avoid writing advice from those who write extremely poorly?



  • @sanath123 said:

    Also it provides a free resume templates samples so that users may choose any one these resume sample and he can use it as a standard Resume format.

    p { margin-bottom: 0.21cm; }</blockquote>&nbsp;</p><p>What a coincidence, my employer is looking for someone experienced in 
    
    
    
    
    p { margin-bottom: 0.21cm; }!</p>


  • @Justice said:

    @sanath123 said:

    Also it provides a free resume templates samples so that users may choose any one these resume sample and he can use it as a standard Resume format. p { margin-bottom: 0.21cm; }

     

    What a coincidence, my employer is looking for someone experienced in p { margin-bottom: 0.21cm; }!

    Spam removed.  I left your replies to him intact though.  Carry on folks.


  • @DOA said:

    @fennec said:

    @DOA said:
    I'll come work for you but only if it's in a secret installation inside a volcano and the work I do is for hunter-killer robots.

    Does a Rovio tethered to a rolling plant stand with a life-size theatrical-quality cardboard cutout of a Stormtrooper on top count?

    I'm sorry, but I just don't feel you guys are serious about world domination.

     

    We're on a budget here! We needed to save some money for helium for our airship.


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