No phone? Call this number!



  • My University's ICT department recently decided to make sure our internal staff directory was up to date. To that end, they've threatened that any staff member who hasn't entered all their details will have their email account suspended by the start of the next term. With their usual flair for efficiency and forethought, the following is an excerpt from one of their reminders:

    If you cannot complete a particular field (e.g. you have no phone number) please contact [the ICT Systems Operations Manager] (Tel: 123 456 789) to discuss the best course of action.

    The funny thing about the lack of a phone number is that it tends to go hand-in-hand with the lack of a phone. Thankfully, the aforementioned manager had an up-to-date directory entry, so I was able to find his email address instead.



  •  Obviously they expect you to call from that run-down phone booth behind the train station.



  •  This reminds me of trying to get my phone connected the last time I moved house. I called them from a phone box, and the conversation went something like...

     Me: "Hi, I've just moved in to <address>, and I'd like to get a phone line put in."

    Call-centre guy: "No problem. Can I take your phone number please?"

    Me: "I don't have a phone. That's why I'm calling you. If I had a phone, I wouldn't need one put in, would I?"

    Call-centre guy: "Well, we need a phone number for our records."

    Me: "How about I give you the number of this phone box I'm calling you from?"

    Call-centre guy: "That'll be fine"

     I have no idea if they ever tried to phone me back, or who might have answered if they did.

     



  •  @Wrongfellow said:

    <snip>

    Call-centre guy: "Well, we need a phone number for our records."

    <snip>

    You should have answered something like "one" or "42". That could have been fun!

     



  • Call-centre guy: "Well, we need a phone number for our records."

    Me: "Ok. 1..."

    Call-centre guy: "1."

    Me: "Ok. 2..."

    Call-centre guy: "2."

    Me: "Ok. 3..."

    Call-centre guy: "3."

    Me: "Ok. 4..."

    Call-centre guy: "4."

    Me: "Ok. 5..."

    Call-centre guy: "5."

    Me: "Ok. 6..."

    Call-centre guy: "6."

    Me: "That's it."

    Call-centre guy: "123456. "



  • 123456? That's amazing, I have the same combination on my luggage!

     



  • Give them their own phone number.



  • Nah, give them one of those pay numbers that gives you money for being called.



  •  867-5309?



  • @Daid said:

    Call-centre guy: "Well, we need a phone number for our records."

    FOR 1-5 as X BEGIN

       Me: "Ok. %X..."

       Call-centre guy: "%X."

    END

    Me: "That's it."

    Call-centre guy: "123456. "

     

    +1 humor



  • @Wrongfellow said:

     Me: "Hi, I've just moved in to <address>, and I'd like to get a phone line put in."

    Call-centre guy: "No problem. Can I take your phone number please?"

    Me: "I don't have a phone. That's why I'm calling you. If I had a phone, I wouldn't need one put in, would I?"

    I've had a cell/mobile phone since 1999 and only got my own landline in 2001 (moved out of home and wanted ADSL). Is that what they could be asking for? I know my phone companies always asked for a mobile phone number: one even sent SMS updates. Also, here in Australia if you have a dial tone on a line (even with no account - so you can't make/receive normal calls), you can dial 12722123 and it will read back a number (the one last associated with that line) and providing that number makes the connection a little quicker.



  • This makes me think of the following conversation with a slightly-intelligence-deprived colleague (who actually works on our IT helpdesk):



    Me: "Just so you know, if anyone has trouble with email, its because the server's down. I'm just trying to sort it out now."



    Colleague: "Ok, thanks for telling me. I'll send an email to everyone to let them know"



    And, yes, the server in question was the one we all use... including him.



  • @MeesterTurner said:

    Colleague: "Ok, thanks for telling me. I'll send an email to everyone to let them know"

    Recently someone posted a nice variation on that

    @someone@somewhere said:

    Colleague: "Ok, thanks for telling me. I'll send an email to everyone."

    Mail: "Dear all, the mail server is back online."

     



  • I had a friend who was trying to get his phone number changed. It had taken quite a while to go through, and he'd phoned them a few times to try and hurry them up. Eventually one day he gets a call from an engineer: "Hello, I'm phoning to ask if your number change has gone through successfully." My friend replied with "I don't know, which number did you dial?"


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