Okay, SERIOUS WTF



  • I get email from someone wanting me to do models/textures for his video game.

    I tell him I'm not a modeller or an artist. He insists he worked really hard to look me up when he saw my work on ZBrush Central.

    On what?

    Well, over here, he says:

    http://www.zbrushcentral.com/zbc/showthread.php?t=10884

    Let's ignore the immediate WTF that this guy was trying to look up an artist for his videogame based on a six-and-a-half year old thread, and the accompanying WTF that he thought this image was somehow appealing. After all, de gustibus non disputandum est, ne c'est pas? (WTF #3: Mixing Latin and French consecutively in an ostensibly English sentence.)

    But seriously, people, why is some random artist using my name in 2002?!

    That's my name! My real, legal name! It's not like it's in any way common! WTF is up with that?!

    I believe this is probably the single most incompetent case of identity theft in all recorded history.



  •  Are you sure you don't have a split personality?



  •  Well - someone forgot to add unique key on (firstname, middlename, surname), and world's name storage is corrupted now :(

    But really - is it that hard to find 2 people with the same full name?



  • @CDarklock said:

    But seriously, people, why is some random artist using my name in 2002?!
    Well, you do have a pretty cool name.  If mine were that cool, I would advertise it all over.

    Admit it, you stole an artist's identity to prevent him from getting an important job offer, all in the quest for lulz



  • @viraptor said:

    is it that hard to find 2 people with the same full name?

    If my name were, say, George Alex Cooper - no.

    But Caliban Tiresias Darklock?

    Care to calculate the odds?

    @belgariontheking said:

    Well, you do have a pretty cool name.

    To be fair, I did change it. My parents aren't that weird.

    Yes, it was my D&D character.

    No, I will not fix your computer.



  • @CDarklock said:

    My parents aren't that weird.

    and yet, they bore you



  • @CDarklock said:

    No, I will not fix your computer.

    And I don't want you to.


    1. I can fix it myself.
    2. I don't want you changing all possibly nameable objects to their D&D counterparts.


  • @viraptor said:

     Well - someone forgot to add unique key on (firstname, middlename, surname), and world's name storage is corrupted now :(

    But really - is it that hard to find 2 people with the same full name?

    Depends on how your country assigns surnames.

    USA/UK - Name(s) + 1 Father's surname.

    Latin America (and Spain?) - Name(s) + 2 surnames (father, mother); single-mother children keep only the mother's one if there is no parent.

    Japan - Surname (the most important one) + Name(s)

    China - Choose only one surname from 120. Worst scenario, as it's pretty possible to find a zillion people with your same name/surname combination!!!

    Still, even in the Latin American System I've seen two people with the same surname combination without being brothers, and at least one case where I would find 2 matches for the name/2surname combo. Yipes!



  • @campkev said:

    and yet, they bore you

    If they were weirder, I wouldn't be so bored with them.



  • You actually legally changed your name to match your D&D character!?  Perhaps that persons internet name is also a D&D character belonging to a more sane person :o



  • @danixdefcon5 said:

    single-mother children keep only the mother's one if there is no parent.

    What the fuck is that sentence supposed to mean? Most children only have one mother. And I haven't got a clue how to parse the second part of the sentence.



  • @Flatline said:

    @danixdefcon5 said:

    single-mother children keep only the mother's one if there is no parent.

    What the fuck is that sentence supposed to mean? Most children only have one mother. And I haven't got a clue how to parse the second part of the sentence.

    You failed the Turing test. Humans should be able to understand slightly erroneous grammar or words as e.g. coming from a foreign speaker. The algorithm: indentify the parts of the sentence you have problems with, make a list of possible substitutions, find the meaning which makes most sense.



  • Okay, you newly defined the word geek for me. Good you didn't have a female DND character (or, more confusingly, you could be a girl, using that name... but then again, there are no girls on the Internet).

    However, I have a similar story. My name isn't that extraordinarily strange, but... there are only 2 other families with my surname in Germany (though there are more in the US), and one of their members shares my first and second name.

    Guess how strange it was when someone asked my in ICQ how my girlfriend was. Lol. That's why I removed my name from there.

    Anyway, OP. Don't you think it's possible that one of the guys you used to play DND with liked your name that much that he took it as his online nick?



  • @strcmp said:

    @Flatline said:
    @danixdefcon5 said:

    single-mother children keep only the mother's one if there is no parent.

    What the fuck is that sentence supposed to mean? Most children only have one mother. And I haven't got a clue how to parse the second part of the sentence.
    You failed the Turing test. Humans should be able to understand slightly erroneous grammar or words as e.g. coming from a foreign speaker. The algorithm: indentify the parts of the sentence you have problems with, make a list of possible substitutions, find the meaning which makes most sense.

     Indentify, eh? And it's not 'slightly erroneous grammar', it's the logic that's utterly flawed. But nice attempt at sounding intelligent by using big words. Shame the smaller one tripped you up.



  • @derula said:

    Guess how strange it was when someone asked my in ICQ how my girlfriend was. Lol. That's why I removed my name from there.
     

     Better than what is the case with me. I have a rather unique family name (Jewish name translated to Dutch a few centuries ago) and only share it with a US-branch of the family.

    One of them is/was remotely computer-adept a decade ago and registered the family name. And then put a website there made by frontpage 97 or something like that about the bakery he owned, which carries the family name.

    So up and until this day www.myfamilyname.com points to a frontpage 97-generated site about a bakery. Worse still, it only works in Internet Explorer 4 and is ugly on any other resolution than 800x600.

    I decided to check it and try to remove it +- 3 years ago. Turns out he died in 2001. Guess he forgot to stop the hosting and his family didn't notice the 25 bucks a year that were transferred from his bank account.



  • @dtech said:

    I decided to check it and try to remove it +- 3 years ago. Turns out he died in 2001. Guess he forgot to stop the hosting and his family didn't notice the 25 bucks a year that were transferred from his bank account.

    Let's DDoS it!



  • @viraptor said:

    But really - is it that hard to find 2 people with the same full name?
     

    No.  Not hard at all.

    In fact, I lived in a city with someone with exactly the same name as me (including the middle name and spelling).  Radio Shack, being the morons they are, decided that keying their customer DB against Full Name + City would do.  So every time I visited there, they had to overwrite his info with my info (only the postal code would change).  They asked for that crap every time you shopped there, even for batteries, at the time.  Since it was fun to see how pointlessly frustrating this problem was, I'd give them the info each time.  :-D

     I wonder what would happen if Radio Shack tried to process a return in my name...



  • @Flatline said:

    it's the logic that's utterly flawed
     

    Hey, Flatline. Do what your name suggests: FOAD.

    Danixdefcon5 is from Mexico City (see the part under his avatar that says so?), and as a person who speaks English as a second language does extremely well.

    I had no problem figuring out that what he meant was "single-mother children use their only parents' surname". Sorry that you were unable to do so yourself; doesn't speak well for your intelligence.

    Do everyone a favor, and withhold your posts here in the future until you: a) develop a brain; b) learn to understand that not everyone natively speaks English; and c) develop an actual personality. Thanks in advance.

     



  • @CDarklock said:

    To be fair, I did change it. My parents aren't that weird.

    Yes, it was my D&D character.

     

    Now that is a WTF of epic proportions.  Unless your given name was something like Arseface Bundy McStalin, what was the point?  And more importantly, why admit to doing it?  And even more importantly, why a D&D character?

    I'm guessing this change has not had the desired effect on others' perception.



  • @Flatline said:

    @strcmp said:

    @Flatline said:
    @danixdefcon5 said:

    single-mother children keep only the mother's one if there is no parent.

    What the fuck is that sentence supposed to mean? Most children only have one mother. And I haven't got a clue how to parse the second part of the sentence.
    You failed the Turing test. Humans should be able to understand slightly erroneous grammar or words as e.g. coming from a foreign speaker. The algorithm: indentify the parts of the sentence you have problems with, make a list of possible substitutions, find the meaning which makes most sense.

     Indentify, eh? And it's not 'slightly erroneous grammar', it's the logic that's utterly flawed. But nice attempt at sounding intelligent by using big words. Shame the smaller one tripped you up.

    Big words? LOL.

    Where exactly did strcmp get tripped up by smaller words? And really, your picking on the grammar skills of a non-native speaker doesn't say much about you.



  • @shadowman said:

    Where exactly did strcmp get tripped up by smaller words? And really, your picking on the grammar skills of a non-native speaker doesn't say much about you.

    This is TDWTF... it's pretty typical for people to get ripped on.

    I'll feel bad when Mexicans get their customer support calls routed to the US and caucasian support reps with incomprehensible accents and fake Mexican names answer the phones and annoy the shit out of them.



  • @CDarklock said:

    @viraptor said:

    is it that hard to find 2 people with the same full name?

    If my name were, say, George Alex Cooper - no.

    But Caliban Tiresias Darklock?

    Care to calculate the odds?

     


    OK yes thats a good point. So, given the virtual impossibility of that we left with other even more unlikely possibilities being the only possible explanation. Namely, you have a split personality. Given that you changed your own legal name to that of your D&D character, that doesn't seem to beyond the realm of possibility. Ever have blackouts? Wake up on a bus and not remember getting on?



  •  @shepd said:

    @viraptor said:

    But really - is it that hard to find 2 people with the same full name?
     

    No.  Not hard at all.

    In fact, I lived in a city with someone with exactly the same name as me.

    Yup not that weird. I once discovered (on the company intranet) that there was another person with the exact same first and last name as me, and they were also a java programmer *and* they worked for the same company - Reuters. Pretty freaky given that my full  name is Miles Thompson, huh.Admittedly they were on the other side of the planet.



  • @CDarklock said:

    ...After all, de gustibus non disputandum est, ne c'est pas? (WTF #3: Mixing Latin and French consecutively in an ostensibly English sentence.)

    WTF #4 trying to quote in French and getting it horribly wrong, n'est-ce pas?



  • @utunga said:

     @shepd said:

    @viraptor said:

    But really - is it that hard to find 2 people with the same full name?
     

    No.  Not hard at all.

    In fact, I lived in a city with someone with exactly the same name as me.

    Yup not that weird. I once discovered (on the company intranet) that there was another person with the exact same first and last name as me, and they were also a java programmer *and* they worked for the same company - Reuters. Pretty freaky given that my full  name is Miles Thompson, huh.Admittedly they were on the other side of the planet.

    Several years back, I was at a computer show at the Hynes Convention Center in Boston, and someone came up to me, looked at my name tag, and said, "Do you know there's another Rob Freundlich here?  He's over at the SourceControlSoft booth."  Weird coincidence - the *only* reason I was at this show was to go see the folks at SourceControlSoft.  I hurried over, and I had just missed him.  But someone there knew him and gave me his email address.  Turns out he's a second cousin once removed, and neither of us knew about the other.  My father had just done our family tree, and had stopped at his father, so he was pretty psyched to find another leaf.

    Anyway, suddenly various phone calls I'd gotten over the past few years made sense:

     "Hello, is this Rob Freundlich who plays the guitar?"  "Yes"  "This is so-and-so, wanting to see when you're coming back for more lessons."  "I've never heard of you"

     "Hello, is this Rob Freundlich?"  "Yes"  "This is so-and-so, from OrganizationINeverHeardOf.  We'd like to thank you for your help organizing Event last year.  Can we count on your help again this year?"  "WTF?"



  • @vr602 said:

    WTF #4 trying to quote in French and getting it horribly wrong

    WTF #5: Complaining that someone who doesn't speak French can't spell in it.



  • @Morbii said:

    You actually legally changed your name to match your D&D character!?

    Well, there's a story there. When I was a kid, I did a lot of BBS stuff, and the concept of the "handle" was well-established so I could use a fake name. I used my D&D character. Since I go to conventions and ren faires, where handles and nicknames are also common, the people I knew from some BBS or other tended to call me by that name. Fast forward ten years, and I'm a computer professional running his own IT consulting business, so I meet people online and they want me to come do work for them. I go work for them, and they write a check to my D&D character. I have to explain it's not my real name and get them to write another check, which I am convinced made many clients think I was weird and start calling someone else. I register a DBA with the county, so I can do business under the "fake" name, and my bank keeps being snotty about it and complaining that their "legitimate" business customers don't use an "alias". Couple more years, I go to a party - and there are people who know me from the computer and the internet who call me one thing, while people who know me from work and the neighborhood call me something else. This confuses the "normal" people. (The BBS and internet people just think it's cool.)

    As an American, I have every legal right to use whatever name I damn well please, and as many of them as I deem necessary. Unfortunately, as a member of human society, I have certain social expectations and obligations. I had to pick one name and use just that one name, so I picked the one I gave myself.

    No, my father has never forgiven me, but I don't care. My eldest son's name is Logan Scott Darklock. You guessed it, we named him after Wolverine. My youngest son is Conor James Darklock; he's named after the Highlander. And when people question their names, they'll be able to say "yes, this IS the name my massively cool parents gave me!"

    Okay, so maybe they'll heave a big sigh and say "retarded" instead of "massively cool", but it's not like we didn't try.



  • @CDarklock said:

    I used my D&D character. Since I go to conventions and ren faires, where handles and nicknames are also common, the people I knew from some BBS or other tended to call me by that name.
    Reminds me of the time I was in Boston and met up with two members of this forum.  I called one of them Brandon.  The other, morbs.  All day.  I don't remember whether they referred to me as anything but "drunk ass cursing bitch."


  • :belt_onion:

    @belgariontheking said:

    I called one of them Brandon
     

    Brandon Storer?



  • @bjolling said:

    @belgariontheking said:
    I called one of them Brandon
    Brandon Storer?
    Nope.  I would have called him pesto all weekend.



  • @bjolling said:

    @belgariontheking said:

    I called one of them Brandon
     

    Brandon Storer?

    Yeah, right.  Like I'd go anywhere near Boston...


  • @dhromed said:


    2. I don't want you changing all possibly nameable objects to their D&D counterparts.
     

    You mean "My Documents" to "Klal the Destroyer's Diary of Pain" and "My Computer" to "Gizmit's Sparkly Silicone Thingamagig"?



  • @bstorer said:

    @bjolling said:

    @belgariontheking said:

    I called one of them Brandon
     

    Brandon Storer?

    Yeah, right.  Like I'd go anywhere near Boston...

    This is why I make you wear a paper sack over your head. 



  • @astonerbum said:

    @dhromed said:


    2. I don't want you changing all possibly nameable objects to their D&D counterparts.
     

    You mean "My Documents" to "Klal the Destroyer's Diary of Pain" and "My Computer" to "Gizmit's Sparkly Silicone Thingamagig"?

    Damn! Does that mean I now have to throw d20 hitrolls each time I want to delete a file?

    Oh, and I'd have to rename all IM clients to "Pallantir" as well.



  • @danixdefcon5 said:

    Damn! Does that mean I now have to throw d20 hitrolls each time I want to delete a file?

    Oh, and I'd have to rename all IM clients to "Pallantir" as well.

     

    What? No you got to hope that you roll 60 on a 3d20 or Klal is formatting your hard drive.

    And already all my IM contacts have been automatically renamed to monsters I have to kill. My wife is a Harpy, my friends are all Goblins, and my co-workers are dragons. It works rather well.



  • @astonerbum said:

    all my IM contacts have been automatically renamed to monsters I have to kill

    I was once forbidden by management to blog about my co-workers by name, on the grounds of confidentiality. So I said "can I use code names?" - they couldn't come up with a reason why not, and they agreed that would be just fine.

    So the next time I wanted to blog about my job, I pulled up the Wikipedia entry on the cast of Naruto...

     

     



  • @CDarklock said:

    @Morbii said:

    You actually legally changed your name to match your D&D character!?

    Well, there's a story there. When I was a kid, I did a lot of BBS stuff, and the concept of the "handle" was well-established so I could use a fake name. I used my D&D character. Since I go to conventions and ren faires, where handles and nicknames are also common, the people I knew from some BBS or other tended to call me by that name. Fast forward ten years, and I'm a computer professional running his own IT consulting business, so I meet people online and they want me to come do work for them. I go work for them, and they write a check to my D&D character. I have to explain it's not my real name and get them to write another check, which I am convinced made many clients think I was weird and start calling someone else. I register a DBA with the county, so I can do business under the "fake" name, and my bank keeps being snotty about it and complaining that their "legitimate" business customers don't use an "alias". Couple more years, I go to a party - and there are people who know me from the computer and the internet who call me one thing, while people who know me from work and the neighborhood call me something else. This confuses the "normal" people. (The BBS and internet people just think it's cool.)

    As an American, I have every legal right to use whatever name I damn well please, and as many of them as I deem necessary. Unfortunately, as a member of human society, I have certain social expectations and obligations. I had to pick one name and use just that one name, so I picked the one I gave myself.

    No, my father has never forgiven me, but I don't care. My eldest son's name is Logan Scott Darklock. You guessed it, we named him after Wolverine. My youngest son is Conor James Darklock; he's named after the Highlander. And when people question their names, they'll be able to say "yes, this IS the name my massively cool parents gave me!"

    Okay, so maybe they'll heave a big sigh and say "retarded" instead of "massively cool", but it's not like we didn't try.

     

    As far as I can see you haven't achieved anything except having outed yourself as being self-conscious, insecure and socially inept. Strike one, two and three - you fail!



  • @cklam said:

    As far as I can see you haven't achieved anything except having outed yourself as being self-conscious, insecure and socially inept.

    That's because you don't know me. I'm freakin' awesome.



  • @CDarklock said:

    @cklam said:

    As far as I can see you haven't achieved anything except having outed yourself as being self-conscious, insecure and socially inept.

    That's because you don't know me. I'm freakin' awesome.

    Let me add "Bordering on MU-BWA-HA-HA-HA" to the list ... :)



  • @CDarklock said:

    I go work for them, and they write a check to my D&D character. I have to explain it's not my real name and get them to write another check, which I am convinced made many clients think I was weird and start calling someone else. I register a DBA with the county, so I can do business under the "fake" name, and my bank keeps being snotty about it and complaining that their "legitimate" business customers don't use an "alias"
     

    Couldn't you have just registered a trading name? I used to accept cheques and direct transfers to my trading name: In fact once one of my clients made a typo on my account number for a transfer and my bank picked up the error, deposited it into my account and posted me a personalised letter letting me know!

    (I let my business go so I could work for someone else and get some "real" experience)



  • @Zemm said:

    Couldn't you have just registered a trading name? [My bank accepts those.]
    @CDarklock said:
    I register a DBA ["doing business as" name] with the county, ..., [and my bank doesn't accept it.]
    And that's why Delaware invented Limited Liability Companies, which, if a sole proprietorship, can be treated as a Disregarded Entity for tax purposes.



  • @Flatline said:

    What the fuck is that sentence supposed to mean? Most children only have one mother. And I haven't got a clue how to parse the second part of the sentence.
     

     I LOL'd. A lot.



  • @cklam said:

    Let me add "Bordering on MU-BWA-HA-HA-HA" to the list ... :)

    Bordering? I say that all the time. Well, not all the time. Sometimes I say other things. If that was all I ever said, I'd never get anything done.

    Although it would be almost as fun as International Talk Like A Pirate Day... when I also don't tend to get anything done. And meetings are quite interesting.


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